Stairwells and Steering Wheels
by Vix23
Summary: He let out a long, heavy sigh and crossed his arms over his chest. "I just can't figure her out! She's all mixed signals and mysterious smirks. The girl should come with a manual." --- A series of moments between Sam and Freddie during their Junior year.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly and I am not profiting off this story. Just an avid fan that enjoys exploring where the characters might go...

*

Prologue

August 19 - 1:00 am

Freddie fell into a fitful and angry sleep, which was not ideal but certainly beat out the alternative emotions he had to select from. He couldn't get the image of them together out of his head. She was all sarcasm and long blonde hair and he was all tall and _winky_. He felt like an idiot, obsessing over her for the last several months, turning every little interaction into an epic of hidden signs, and meanwhile, she was off finding her next boyfriend.

He hated her. He had hated her before, he could certainly hate her again. He just had to remind himself of all her faults. She was mean, she was sarcastic, she was emotionally stunted and immature, she was violent, she was gross----dirty----loud----obnoxious---demanding----aggressive----impossible. That is what it all really came down to. She was impossible. They were impossible.

His dreams were erratic and disconnected. Real memories and fantasies combined to create an impossible illusion within his mind.

He could smell her hair, he could hear her whisper his name, he could feel her tugging at him insistently ---

"Sam?" The darkness of the room and her hood obstructed the majority of her expression, but she was standing with one shoulder hitched and her hands in her back pockets, a posed and practiced indifference expertly projected.

She nodded her head towards the hallway. "Come on." He couldn't tell if her voice was hoarse or if she was simply attempting to whisper.

He sleepily followed her out into the hall and through the large window to the fire escape. Rain was falling in sheets around them and the sky lit up every few minutes followed immediately by resounding booms of thunder. "The storm is right on top of us." He spoke just to have something to say, a way to break up the deafening silence between them.

She just nodded and shrugged as she pulled her bright hoodie a little closer around her damp body and fell haphazardly into the camping chair she had marked as her own in the months prior. He mimicked her actions with the identical chair beside hers, again, he thought, just for something to do.

Usually, in better times, they would both have slung their legs on the shared ottoman, crossing them over one another's, tangling their calves, feet, and toes, but tonight Freddie pushed the ottoman away with the ball of his bare foot, and kept his feet firmly planted on the cool concrete. She had her hands buried deep within the over-sized pockets on the hoodie, and had folded her entire body into the chair in a way that left one knee exposed through a rip in her jeans and her face completely turned to face Freddie.

They sat there, settling themselves in, listening to the rain and the thunder, before Freddie finally turned to her. "What are you doing here?" Disgust and anger dripped off every word as he looked her square in the eye.

She cocked her eyebrow at his tone, but apparently selected to ignore it, or accept it, because she simply shrugged. "You're the one that insisted we have to talk." She dropped his gaze for a moment to look around the fire escape. "I figured this was the most appropriate place to discuss _everything_."

*

**A/N: This will be a 9 chapter story following Sam and Freddie during the end of their Junior year and the summer before their Senior year. I have all of the chapters written but I am a perfectionist so I am still working on edits. The prologue is an excerpt from the last chapter. Chapter one will be 6 months prior to this moment.**

**Any reviews throughout the story are appreciated. I have spent a lot of time trying to figure this out so I hope you enjoy it!**


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly and I am not profiting off of this story in any way...just exploring.

Chapter 1

February 3 - Six Months Earlier

The slight vibration in his pocket served as warning a split second before _A Whole New World_ came blaring out. Twenty-plus high-schoolers of various ages all turned to stare at Freddie, who fumbled gracelessly as he attempted to extract the offending PearPhone from his jeans. The sound of the Disney classic became increasingly louder as the phone was finally freed and a group of sophomore girls by the door started to snicker in Freddie's direction. Freddie quickly clicked 'ignore' as he silently cursed Sam, whose smirking image was still flashing on his screen.

She was in the middle of an extended prank that involved downloading embarrassing ringtones on his phone and then calling him at optimal times of humiliation, such as now, in the middle of 7th period study hall. He had thought he had put an end to the long game a few weeks ago after a particularly poorly timed "I'm Too Sexy" ringer had interrupted his Pastor's Sunday sermon. He had refused to talk to her for three days until she finally apologized in her own way with a peace offering of Fatcakes and a smirk. "Move on Freddie. At least now all the church ladies know you're too sexy for your pants." He smiled slightly thinking back on it. Afterward, there had been no further incidents. He frowned - _until now, that is._

His PearPhone interrupted his thoughts as it vibrated again in his hand. He clicked Sam's waiting text message ominously.

_I got you something…_

His body tensed as he clicked on the thumbnail image attached to the text but his expression and stance instantly relaxed and he smothered a laugh as an image of Kevin Hunt, the captain of the football team and Freddie's personal nemesis, flicked onto the screen. Kevin appeared to be passed out in some type of parking lot. He was surrounded by empty beef jerky wrappers and multiple crushed beer cans. His shirt was half open and missing several buttons and his jeans were on backwards and pulled down in a haphazard way to show off a good portion of his left upper thigh without going so far as to be indecent. The flash of the camera reflected magnificently off the sticky pool of drool that clung to his face and the asphalt. Pink lipstick was smeared across his lips and Freddie couldn't be sure but it appeared he was wearing eye makeup. The best part of it all was that Kevin's "lucky" American flag boxers, which the entire school knew he wore every game day, were hanging from his mouth.

His phone vibrated again and he let out another muffled laugh before clicking away from the image to read the new text message.

_Meet me out front_

Freddie's smile faded as he quickly typed back the obvious response.

_No._

_Why not? Come on dork, live a little._

_I'm in class!_

_Study Hall is not class. Plus, your teacher isn't even there._

Freddie looked up to the empty desk at the front of the room and pondered the omniscience of Sam. He flipped his phone through his fingers as he considered the potential fallout for following his delinquent friend's lead. Before he could properly form an opinion, the phone shook again in his fingers.

_I can show you the world...shining, shimmering, whatever_

Freddie smirked as another message instantly flashed on the screen.

_Come on princess._

In a split second decision Freddie shoved his phone in his pocket and stood up. He quickly packed up his books and ignored the two senior boys in the back of the room who began to deliver a very bad rendition of the Aladdin duet. He ducked his head and exited the classroom, mumbling about not feeling well. It wasn't until he was free and clear in the hallway that he realized it appeared he was fleeing the classroom with his tail between his legs due to his own humiliation. He groaned but knew there was no turning back so he made his way quickly through the hallways.

As soon as he was out the heavy double doors located at the front of the school he was greeted by a blast of frigid February air. He tucked his hands up in his sleeves and jogged over to Sam, who was kneeling by the flagpole with something bright hanging from her mouth.

"Hey." Freddie shuffled quickly from foot to foot attempting to regain feeling in his legs.

Sam spun around, shock and guilt contorting her features momentarily before she visibly relaxed. "Oh. It's you." She smirked as she dropped the red, white, and blue fabric from her mouth and into her hands. "Skipping class, Freddork? What would mommy say?"

Freddie rolled his eyes. "Study Hall" he clarified as his teeth began to violently chatter and the shuffling morphed into hopping. He looked closer at what Sam had just dropped into her hands and he grimaced in recognition.

"That's not…?

She smiled as she stood up and brushed off her ripped and faded jeans. "Mmmmm hmmmm."

"How did you…?"

"No time for details Fredward, help me attach them to the flagpole before school lets out."

She tossed the boxers in his direction and turned back to the flagpole. Freddie took a tentative step forward as Sam began to prepare the clips attached to the line. He caught the boxers between two fingers and grimaced at the shiny fabric.

"No gross. You take them." He tossed them back at Sam. Unfortunately, he completed this action as she was turning around to direct him in his assistance and the boxers landed unceremoniously on her face. Sam peeled them off and glared angrily at a wide-eyed Freddie.

"Really?" She growled. He took a tentative step back and she hardened her gaze. After a few cold and silent seconds, she let out a long sigh. "Just come over here and help me lift the line." He eagerly stepped forward and assisted Sam in pulling the thin rope. Once the boxers were at full mast, both teens stepped back simultaneously to admire the effect. The satin sheen on the fabric caught the afternoon sunlight as the boxers gently waved with each new gust of cold air.

"It seems a little traditional for you."

She nodded. "Sometimes you don't mess with a classic."

Freddie shoved his hands further in his pockets and nudged Sam's hip with his own. "Okay. Another day, another crime. Let's go inside now."

He turned on his heel and managed one step towards the brightly lit school entrance, which promised warmth and shelter, before Sam roughly grabbed his arm.

"Ahhh no Jasmine. You don't return to the scene of the crime."

Freddie's face fell as his teeth again began to chatter. "What-do-we-do-then?" He asked between violent shivers.

Sam rolled her eyes and assumed a classic Sam expression which could be described as something between amusement and frustration. "Come on." She tugged a shaking Freddie towards the junior parking lot. Freddie let Sam lead him through the numerous cars and couldn't help but notice that each windshield had a copy of the Kevin Hunt photo snug beneath the wiper blades. He smirked at the back of the blonde head in front of him and admired the audacity of this prank. Kevin Hunt was not one to be toyed with lightly.

Sam stopped in front of Freddie's old Volvo station wagon in its usual spot and looked back expectedly at her friend. "Keys?" she demanded. He wordlessly grabbed the silver ring of keys from his pocket and placed them in her awaiting hand. Sam swiftly unlocked the driver's door, climbed in and reached over the spotless console to release the lock on the passenger side. She looked up at him and nodded her head towards the seat opposite her.

With the promise of warmth, Freddie came to his senses. He raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "Ummm no." He pointed to the passenger seat and Sam let out a heavy sigh as she clumsily climbed over the center console. Freddie slammed the driver's door shut behind him and quickly turned the car on.

"Are you _ever_ going to let me drive?" She asked, accentuating her exasperation.

"When you get a drivers license."

"I can't help it if the DMV has it out for me." She reached to adjust the heat and shifted the vents to maximize the amount of air hitting her body. Freddie slapped her hand away and turned off the heat.

"Let her warm up." He said as way of explanation as he caressed the dashboard lovingly.

Sam let out a half grunt, half moan and rubbed her arms vigorously before settling back into the cold and cracked leather. They sat in a chilly but comfortable silence for several minutes as their breath crystallized in clouds around them.

"Let's go to Inside Out Burger and get some food." Sam leaned slightly forward in her seat as she broke the quiet and turned towards Freddie. He shot her a look.

"What? I didn't get lunch." She explained as he reached to turn the heat back on.

"Okay – and Carly can just walk home then."

"Oh right." Sam let out a heavy sigh and her stomach audibly growled.

Freddie leaned into the back seat and returned with a small insulated lunchbox. He tossed it to Sam.

She let out a squeak of delight before hurriedly unzipping the soft box and dumping its contents onto her lap.

She ripped open a bag of cheese curls with her teeth and munched happily as she hummed.

Freddie looked over at her in frustration. "You're welcome."

She cocked an eyebrow and looked over at him before lazily puffing up her cheeks and pushing air through her lips, spraying orange cheese dust all over the car and Freddie.

"Ewww, Sam!" Freddie reached across her and into the glove compartment for the wet wipes secured there. He wiped the car and his face while glaring at Sam. She cracked a cheesy smile and stuffed several more cheese puffs in her mouth.

The car grew uncomfortably warm as the heat blasted out full force from all of the vents. Freddie watched silently as Sam finished her snack and shoved the rest of the food back into the lunchbox. She then squirmed around in her seat as she removed her navy military style coat and tossed it in the back. In the process, the layers of t-shirts she was wearing rode up her ribcage and her loose jeans slipped down a few inches on her hips, and for a moment Freddie caught a glimpse of the smooth expanse of pale skin along her side and the top of her simple black underwear sitting low beneath her sharp hip bone. She fixed her sleeves and pulled down her top before finally looking towards Freddie.

"What?" She asked, clearly confused by his expression.

He shook his head and attempted to forget the image and the hormone induced thoughts it had triggered. "Nothing." And it was nothing. He was a teenager boy, he couldn't help it if girl skin and black underwear were distracting. It didn't mean anything.

She continued to stare at him quizzically and a strange tension settled between them. Sam finally opened her mouth to reply but music rushed out of Freddie's pocket, effectively cutting her off.

Freddie fumbled with the phone as Sam doubled over in laughter at the familiar song.

He shot her a glare as he picked up the phone and cut off the chorus. "Hello."

"It's Carly."

Hey Carly." Sam stopped laughing abruptly and started to wildly gesticulate beside him.

"I'm standing in front of the school? Where are you guys?"

"Oh yeah, we are already outside in the car, I ummm, I got out of class a little early" Freddie stared at Sam in confusion as she mimed and mimicked some urgent message he was not receiving.

"And Sam?"

"Yeah, she's with me." Sam shook her head vigorously and began slashing her hand across her throat. Freddie shrugged his shoulders in response as he continued his conversation.

Carly's voice was tense and angry. "Did you see what she did?"

"Yeah I saw it." He peered over at Sam who had abandoned her attempts at communication and was now sulking into her seat.

"I can't believe it! Kevin Hunt! Do you know how in the world she got his boxers?"

"No. I don't know how she got the boxers, but that's a very good question." Freddie shot Sam a look, cocking his eyebrow to punctuate the curiosity reflected on his face. She half rolled her eyes and stared back at him.

Carly was panting frantically. "If she's caught, she could be suspended, or she'll probably be expelled! At this rate, we'll never get her through to graduation. Did she consider the freakin' consequences Freddie? Did she?"

"Carly, I don't think Sam ever considers the consequences."

"Well I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind. Open the door."

"Huh?"

"Unlock the door!"

"Oh, okay." He reached behind him and pulled up the lock on the backseat door.

"SAM!" Carly shrieked as she climbed into the car and threw her cell phone on the seat beside her. "That picture is _everywhere._"

Sam smirked and turned around to face her furious friend. "Pretty badass right?"

"SAM!" Carly screeched again. Sam flinched. "Kevin Hunt? Are you crazy?"

She waved off the concern airily. "He had it coming. Plus, who wears American Flag boxers?" Freddie began to nod his head in agreement before catching Carly's terrifying gaze in the rearview mirror. He gulped and reached down to move the gearshift into reverse, hoping movement towards some unknown destination would calm everyone down. Sam's hand instantly covered his own, grabbing at his fingers. The shock of the sudden contact caused him to jump slightly, and his hand began to reflexively pull back before he forced it to settle.

"We can't leave yet." Her warm fingers lingered between his own, coating his knuckles with sticky cheese dust. He looked up at her right as she looked down at their hands and their current precarious position. She quickly pulled away and cleared her throat. "3:15. We can leave at 3:15."

"Why?" Freddie asked, shaking off the moment and attempting to compose himself for the second time that afternoon.

"Just trust me Fredward." Sam took a large bite out of an apple that had appeared out of nowhere and propped her feet on the dashboard. Carly had settled in a discontented huff in the back.

The three sat in silence for several minutes, and Freddie was about to demand an explanation for the delay when Carly spoke up.

"So, I guess it is safe to assume that your date with Kevin last night didn't go so well."

Freddie spun to face Sam in shock. "What!?"

Sam ignored him. "Oh I'd say it went extremely well." She smirked and took another messy bite out of her apple.

"You went on a date with that…with that… douche bag?" Freddie stammered as he closely examined the blonde beside him. She was spinning her apple core slowly, searching for the best remaining bites. He attempted to catch her eye but Sam stubbornly refused to look up from her Granny Smith mission.

"A necessary evil in my master plan." She finally replied as she rolled down the window a crack and tossed what was left of the apple outside into the cold.

Carly sighed in the backseat. "A date with the captain of the football team, and you do _this_." Carly leaned forward and shoved an 8x12 print of the picture between her two friends.

Sam glanced down and looked admiringly upon her handiwork. "Yeah." Pride welled up in her voice and she got a far off look in her eyes before turning her attention back to the lunchbox in her lap. She extracted a string cheese and quickly unwrapped it

Carly leaned back in frustration. "How did you pull it off anyways?"

"Beef jerky, cheap beer, and my feminine wiles." Sam automatically replied as she shoved the entire stick of cheese in her mouth. When no one responded she finally looked up at her wide eyed friends. "What?" she mumbled through a mouth full of mozzarella.

"Sam!" Freddie and Carly both cried simultaneously.

"Oh, get your panties out of a twist. It was all perfectly innocent." She swallowed the cheese and cocked her head in consideration. "Well… for the most part."

Carly sputtered in the back and began mumbling about social suicide and possible expulsion and other things Sam pretended not to care about.

Sam ignored her and trained her eyes on Freddie who sat silently beside her, staring straight ahead. She reached over and shoved him, breaking his reverie. He slowly turned to face her, wearing a composed look but his knuckles, still dusted with artificial cheese, had turned white against the steering wheel.

"Did you…you know…?" Freddie choked on the rest of his words as Sam smirked at him, clearly enjoying his evident discomfort. He nervously pulled his hand through his hair. "How did you get his boxers?" He finally asked, feigning calm.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Magic" she replied flatly.

Freddie let out a nervous laugh and Carly gaped. Sam looked at her watch and back up at her friends, pointedly ignoring the incredulous stares she was receiving from the both of them.

"It's almost time." Her phone rang to help deliver her point and she quickly flipped it open.

"Yeah. Uh-huh. Sounds good. Cool. Bye." She flipped her cell phone shut.

"Lets go." Her legs fell from their perch on the dashboard and she buckled her seatbelt, denying Freddie the chance to demand it of her. "Onward and upward Fredward." She pointed ahead of her, directly at the car parked opposite of the Volvo. Freddie sighed, put the car in reverse, and carefully backed out of the spot.

"Great. Now we have to wait in traffic." He mumbled as he pulled the boxy station wagon into the long waiting line of students, teachers, and parents attempting to exit the Ridgeway parking lot.

The corner of Sam's mouth quirked but she said nothing as she reached down into her red and black bag and extracted Freddie's handheld camera. In a few swift movements she had the camera on and directed towards the center quad of the school where the flagpole stood tall and Kevin Hunt's boxers waved lightly in the breeze.

Freddie looked at her in horror. "Hey! That's my camera! How did you get--"

"Bup." Sam abruptly interrupted him with the obnoxious noise and a wave of her hand. Before Freddie could object further, she was counting down "and in 5-4-3-2-"

The air around them immediately erupted into mayhem, as a remixed version of "America the Beautiful", featuring beat boxing and an electric violin, erupted through Ridgeway's outside speakers. Right as the music started, half a dozen hoodlums in ski masks came bursting out of Ridgeway's doors. Each of the masked strangers wore American flag boxers with satin sheen. Two wore them on their heads, one had fashioned a t-shirt of sorts, what looked to be a girl was wearing them over her pants, what was clearly a boy wore only the boxers, and the final teen was mock flying around the entire scene with the boxers serving as his cape. They were flipping and break dancing and just creating mayhem in general. A few of them began to set off fireworks as what appeared to be half of Ridgeway's faculty chased the delinquents around. Finally, after a long minute of antics and chase, all six teens disappeared in separate directions, leaving panting and furious teachers in their dust. Ms. Briggs was waving her arms frantically, and though her words drowned in the loud music, it wasn't hard to guess their meaning as she angrily pointed to the boxers that had been the center of the entire scene. As she made her way over to the flagpole, presumably to remove the offending evidence, the music suddenly stopped. There was a split second of stunned silence before resounding booms and bangs announced the fireworks exploding from somewhere behind the flagpole. Sparks of various different colors filled the sky as the boxers spontaneously combusted to ashes that fluttered down into the mayhem.

Sam's smile stretched over her entire face. She spun around to gauge the reactions of her two open mouthed friends.

Freddie moved his lips up and down but no words came out. He finally met Sam's eyes. "Subtle."

Carly's shocked voice came from the back. "Imagine if she used her powers for good."

* * *

Freddie dropped Carly off at the art gallery where Spencer was attempting to install a complex standing sculpture involving wax, ribbons, and light bulbs. He had demonstrated the genius of the design to the three teenagers the week prior, when he unveiled the complicated structure and deftly clicked a switch sending thousands of watts of light onto the oversized candle, wax immediately beginning to pool and drip down the ribbons until he turned the switch off. "I'm calling it 'Karate Kid' – get it wax on" he flipped the switch again "wax off" he flipped the switch back and laughed loudly in his excitement. Freddie, Sam, and Carly had stared at him and the sculpture skeptically, clearly not appreciating the concept in the same way Spencer had intended. Sam had pointed at him "did you do all the electrical wiring for that thing?" When he nodded reluctantly, she grabbed the bowl of chips off the table and looked at her friends. "We should prepare to evacuate."

"You sure you don't want us to help Carls?" Freddie made eye contact through the rear view mirror and watched Carly gather her things.

She looked up and glanced pointedly at Sam, who was currently drawing faces on each of her knuckles.

"I'm sure Freddie."

"I could drop off Trouble here and come back?"

Sam stopped her makeshift attempts at creating knuckle art and looked over at him sullenly. "Ehhhh" she whined in protest.

He stared at her flatly as Carly laughed from the backseat. "No – its fine. It shouldn't take too long anyways, and Spencer promised me cheeseburgers and milkshakes afterwards."

Sam spun around quickly in her seat just as Carly slammed the door behind her with a smirk.

"I think we should stay." Sam nodded her head firmly as she spoke but Freddie was already pulling back out onto the street. "They clearly need us!"

"You just want to stay in hopes of getting a free burger."

"No I'm _trying_ to be a good friend."

He scoffed. "Haven't you been banned from that particular gallery?"

She waved her hand flippantly. "A simple misunderstanding."

He rolled his eyes. "I'll take you to get a cheeseburger Sam."

She smiled brightly beside him "_and _a milkshake."

* * *

He swatted her hand away roughly as she reached for the fries laid out carefully over a napkin in his lap. Her face immediately morphed into a comic scowl at the rebuff and in rebuttal she lobbed her balled up cheeseburger wrapper at his head.

Freddie ducked, an autopilot reaction due to her tendency to throw things at him, and ignored her as he partitioned out half of his remaining fries onto a fresh napkin and handed them over. He knew he wasn't going to be able to let it go, and he was childishly hoping that an offering of salt and grease would soften her up. "So – you and Kevin Hunt?"

She dumped his gift of fries unceremoniously into the remainder of her milkshake and began a nauseating blending process with her straw. "Huh?"

He quietly bit into a fry and drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, seeking out a better approach. "Most girls think Kevin is pretty good looking."

She was now using the straw to spoon out the lumpy fry and milkshake mixture into her mouth. "Most girls are idiots."

He sighed but plowed forward as if she hadn't spoken. "I bet they would be _pretty_ _jealous _of you right now."

This seemed to finally catch her attention as she turned towards him in confusion, chocolate smeared over her lips. "What? Cut the crap Benson and let's pull up to the point you are trying to get at."

He sighed and turned towards her. "How did you get his boxers?"

She let out a half laugh and rolled her eyes. "Are you still caught up on that? Come on Fredders, I know you're an innocent and all but even you should be able to work this one out on your own."

He let his head fall against the steering wheel. "You and _Kevin Hunt_." He spat out the other boy's name in disgust.

From the way she shifted in her seat it appeared that she was finally becoming fully aware of the bizarreness of this conversation. "What's the big deal – I know you hate him but it was a prank, it's not like the dude is going to be holding my hand at iCarly rehearsals."

"It is a big deal!" The words rushed out before he could catch them, and as he watched Sam try to contemplate their meaning, he wished that he could reach out in the air and grab them back. After a long awkward pause, she opened her mouth to deliver what he could only assume would be some insulting quip that would rip away the awkwardness and reestablish their normal behavior but he rushed to interrupt her. "I don't know why I need to know – I just need to know."

Sam sighed from beside him and turned to him in a business like fashion. "Listen – I don't know why I'm telling you this, except that this conversation is weird and I want to end it as soon as possible, but Kevin Hunt and I did not do anything that your dorky and prudish mind wouldn't approve of."

He bit the inside of his cheek to prevent the wide smile that threatened to pour over his face. He nodded once and started the ignition.

Sam pushed her seat back so she could better prop her feet up on the dashboard and shoveled more milkshake fries into her mouth. Chocolate dripped on her chin. "That's the last time I try to do something nice for your birthday."

**A/N: There you have it. Chapter 1. It's a doozy. Not all of the chapters are this long but this one sort of took on a mind of its own and I couldn't find a satisfactory way to edit it down. I actually debated not inluding it at all but I would have had to edit the other chapters to get rid of referenes, etc., etc., and in the end, it is hard to throw out 5,000 words you spent hours writing. So - if you like it, I would really appreciate reviews. All of the reviews I have received so far have been great. **


	3. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Still don't own iCarly - if only....

Chapter 2

February 19

Sam kicked the wall in the stairwell a few times and let her head fall back against the opposite wall as she lazily examined her favorite pair of sneakers. They were special edition chucks featuring a design by a famous graffiti artist from New York. Freddie had given them to her for her 17th birthday. It had been the perfect gift and it bothered her slightly that somehow in the last few years he had come to know her better than she would have thought possible. She let out a sigh and pressed her bent legs against the wall. More and more things about Freddie were bothering her lately, or more precisely, her relationship with Freddie. She pushed the uncomfortable train of thought to the back of her mind and instead opted for one of her favorite activities. Sleep. She grabbed her backpack from its perch a few steps down and propped it beneath her head. The soft whir of a vacuum lulled in the background and within seconds she was dozing peacefully.

About half an hour into one of the best naps of Sam's life, a lingering presence began to skirt the edges of her consciousness. Someone had joined her on the steps and was attempting to make their presence known with swift and consistent _nudges (_aka kicks) to her shoulder. She grunted in half sleep but refused to open her eyes. As the foot prepared for another attack, Sam's hand shot out from beneath her makeshift coat blanket and grabbed the familiar sneaker mid stride.

"Sam!" Freddie's voice was high and whiny and had the unmistakable tones of annoyance.

The blonde briefly considered using her strategic hold to bring him to the ground in a painful and humiliating fashion but something about his tone prevented the action and instead she dropped her hold and lazily opened her eyes.

She looked pointedly up at Freddie, who stood a few steps above her perch. "Careful fudgeface, the lamb should not kick the lion in the shoulder."

He rolled his eyes. "Well maybe if the _lion_ wasn't a useless lazy blob the _lamb_ wouldn't be forced to resort to physical blows."

"The lion is the king of the jungle! The lamb should be thankful the lion doesn't eat it." She jabbed a finger up at him for effect

"Well! The lamb---" Freddie paused "actually, can we please stop referring to me as a lamb? It's emasculating."

Sam quickly opened up her mouth to reply when he quickly interrupted her.

"Don't!"

She rolled her eyes but held her tongue. He settled in a direct reflection of her position on the step above her. He crossed his arms tightly over his chest and glared at her from across the stairwell.

She remained nonchalant. "So, I take it from your feeble attempts at violence and insults, you're mad at me."

"You think." The sarcastic anger in his voice was unmistakable.

"You should get over it." She replied flatly.

"Not until you apologize!"

"Seriously?" He nodded. She waved her hand dismissively. "Oh, it's not that bad."

He locked his eyes with hers. "Do you even know why I'm mad at you?"

She narrowed her own blue eyes in consideration. "_Well_ there are a few possibilities."

His anger was briefly replaced with confusion. "What do you mean?"

She ignored him and began a calculated guessing game. "Does it involve the Internet? Or perhaps, I don't know, an online dating profile created for you on the Butch-but-Loving website?"

His eyes widened slightly. "No! Did you create an online profile for me on Butch-but-Loving dot com?" She waved off the question and racked her brain for other likely causes of anger. Freddie was turning slightly pink and spluttering. "No wonder that steel worker from Yakima keeps emailing me!"

"Is this about the missing keys on your laptop?"

"No! But I would appreciate it if you would return a, e, i, o, u, and y."

"_Sometimes_ y."

"What?"

"Never mind. Does it involve your cell phone?"

"No." He was worriedly examining his phone which he had extracted from his pocket following her vague question.

"Your locker?"

"What? No! What did you do to my locker?"

Again she ignored him, and after a brief pause she smirked and pointed at him. "Hair removal?"

His eyes grew wide and he gaped.

"A garden hose and chocolate milk?"

"No! Sam!"

She threw up her arms in her frustration and blew a long breath of air through her teeth. "Well I give up."

Freddie glared at her. "You don't recall somewhere you should be right now?" he asked, mimicking her frustrated movements in his own way.

She looked at him with a slightly confused expression as she moved her jaw back and forth; tracing her memory for the mysterious appointment he was referring to. After a long moment she wrinkled her nose. "Nope, can't say I do."

"You were supposed to meet me at the mall to help me pick out a gift for my mom." He was still slightly flushed, but his anger seemed to be subsiding somewhat as he stared back at his irresponsible friend.

Sam scoffed. "What? That's crazy talk. No way I would agree to do that."

One look at his face and Sam knew the anger was back. "We talked about it yesterday!" Freddie's voice was rising slightly as Sam continued to stare him down in mild disbelief. "Remember – you demanded I buy you a smoothie and I said I would only buy you one if you would help me pick out my mom's birthday gift and you said '_whatever'_ and then I bought you a smoothie--?" He said _whatever_ in what she could only assume was a sad attempt to mimic her, and she frowned when she realized he had actually made his voice lower.

"Hmm." It did sound vaguely familiar but Sam shook her head slowly. "That wasn't me."

"Sam! It was you!"

"Are you sure?"

"What, you think I was hanging out with some other overly agressive blonde that demands I buy her beverages?"

"Claudia Jones was in town yesterday, it could have been her."

He looked at her skeptically. "The supermodel?"

"The resemblance is uncanny. I can understand the potential confusion."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm pretty damn sure it was you."

"How can you be sure?" She was playing with him now, and enjoyed the game thoroughly.

He let out a long breath, loaded with frustrated impatience. "You were wearing a striped top with a fish necklace and those black jeans – with the red threading on the--" He trailed off and looked down at his bent knees. Sam stared at his folded head intently. She could barely remember what she was wearing today, and here Freddie was relaying minute details of the outfit she wore yesterday. And the red threading on that particular pair of jeans was on the back pockets, which generally were on her butt. She frowned and opted to break the awkward moment by ignoring it completely.

"Not ringing any bells" She shook her head and her voice was slow and teasing. He abruptly lifted his head and opened his mouth to object but she quickly cut him off. "What did you get your mom?"

"Nothing! I spent an hour at the mall entrance waiting for _you_ and then I came back here to find you and yell at you."

She smirked, but her lips flattened quickly at the intense and cold glare he was directing at her from across the stairwell. "Ok, ok – chill out. I'll go with you tomorrow."

"My mom's birthday is tomorrow." He spat out the words.

She removed her legs from their perch on the opposite wall and leaned forward, preparing to get up. "So we'll go now. I can't take anymore of your whining."

He narrowed his eyes. "It's Sunday. The mall is already closed."

She frowned and settled back into her previous position. "Oh. So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know!" He roughly rubbed his head, mussing up his hair in an adorable way and she couldn't prevent the smile that spread across her face. He immediately misinterpreted it. "I'm glad to see that my dilemma is so amusing to you!"

She rolled her eyes. "Calm down. We can fix this." She pursed her lips for a long moment before her eyes lit up and she snapped her fingers comically. "I know. You can give her a homemade coupon book. You know, with stuff like _One hug from Fredward Benson._"

He shook his head. "I already gave her that." She gaped at him and he quickly qualified his statement. "When I was five years old."

"O-k. What about you wrap up some cleaning supplies? Your crazy mom would go apeshit for a little Mr. Clean with a bow on it."

"No Sam. This is my mother we are talking about. I need to get her something good." His voice had moved on from frustrated and was taking on tones of despair. Sam frowned as she tried to squash the unfamiliar feelings of guilt that were threatening to rise up in her stomach.

They sat in silence for a long moment, their knees touching in a familiar way, as Sam tried to come up with a viable idea to bail Freddie out of his current problem.

"What about a magazine subscription?"

"Paper cuts." Freddie sighed and let his head fall back against the wall.

Sam bit back the harsh comment that immediately came to mind and instead moved her knee to gently nudge Freddie. He looked over at her with a mixture of expectation and frustration painted on his face.

She let her knee settle back to the intimate position against his and met his gaze. "What about a class?"

He quirked his eyebrow in questioning.

"You know – like mother-son ballet classes or some nonsense like that."

To Sam's surprise, Freddie nodded his head as he considered the idea further. "She has been going on about this Mother-son scrapbooking class at the community center."

Sam clapped her hands together in relief. "There. Problem solved. You can thank me by buying me a smoothie."

He rolled his eyes to the ceiling but a smile played at his lips. "I have no idea why I still hang out with you."

She gently moved her knee against his, making the connection between them more apparent, and he moved his against hers in response. "Oh please - your life would suck without me" she responded playfully.

He shook his head and let out a short chuckle. "Probably."

Sam reached up and started playing with the hem on his jeans, letting her fingers briefly graze the bare skin on his leg before looking back towards him. She couldn't begin to read his expression, so she dropped her hand and cleared her throat. "So, Fredwardo, how 'bout that gratitude smoothie?"

"Fine." He smiled as he slowly got to his feet and reached down to help her up. In an uncharacteristic Sam move, she accepted the proffered hand without any antics and grunted lightly as she moved to an upright position.

"What are you doing in the stairwell anyways?" He finally asked, subtly failing to let go of her hand.

She shrugged. "Spencer saw a dandelion today and declared that it was time for spring cleaning. Officially I am vacuuming the studio right now."

His thumb gently rubbed her knuckles in what seemed to be an absent-minded reflex as he looked at her in confusion. "Huh?"

"I turned the vacuum on and fled. No one uses the back stairwell so I decided to hide out here until Spencer realizes its February."

"Ahhh." He smiled and gently swung their connected hands so that they bumped against his thigh.

She rolled her eyes, and began bounding up the steps, not dropping his hand for some unknown, confusing reason, and instead dragged Freddie along behind her. "Come on. We'll sign you and your mom up to create cheesy memories together and then you can buy me that smoothie."

He laughed breezily behind her, but pulled her to a stop before she could enter the hallway that led to the iCarly studio. "Wait. I have to ask – what the hell did you do with chocolate milk and a garden hose?"

*

**A/N: I have a confession. I told everyone that the whole story was written and I was just caught up in the editing process...this was true, but the editing process required me to add a completely new chapter 2. After reading chapter 1 and the previous chapter 2 (now chapter 3 - coming soon) again, I decided that there needed to be a transitional chapter between them - hence, the brief (but hopefully enjoyable) chapter above. My crazy nature urges me to hold on to this chapter for a few weeks, so when in a few days I all of a sudden think "Oh! Sam should say this instead..." I will be able to finagle the chapter until it feels right, but after all of the great comments I have received so far, I find myself excited to post new chapters and see what y'all think, so I am fighting my urge and posting this after only being in my possession for one day. If you enjoyed it, review and let me know your thoughts.**


	4. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: No ownership of iCarly.

Chapter 3

March 2

Freddie concentrated on the road as Carly beside him stared aimlessly out the window, watching the twilight kissed scenery coast by at a steady speed of 15 mph. She let out a heavy sigh and Freddie caught her movement out of the corner of his eye as she turned to face him.

"Freddie. That old woman with the walker just passed us. Do you plan on us actually getting to the carnival tonight?"

Freddie refused to turn his eyes away from the road as he flipped his turn signal on exactly 20 yards prior to his intended turn.

"I think we are putting ourselves in enough danger tonight Carly, no need to add reckless driving to the mix." He decreased his speed to a steady roll and eased into the right turn.

She huffed in mild annoyance. "Don't you think its time that you put aside your irrational fears of carnivals?"

"Irrational? I almost lost a finger!"

"She was a two foot tall 70 year old woman!"

"She was scary!" He let out an involuntary shudder at the memory.

She waved her arms and rolled her eyes. "Well, I'd be scary too if I was the shortest woman on earth and I lived in a cage with little boys poking at me all day!"

"She bit me! Do you know how many shots my mother gave me that night?"

Carly smirked but kindly remained quiet. She returned her gaze to the window and appeared content to watch the quaint colorful houses lazily pass by. Freddie cringed thinking about the night ahead of him. Growing up the son of Marissa Benson did not come without its side effects, one of the main ones being an overwhelming fear of---well of _life_, he admitted halfheartedly to himself. He sat up a little straighter in the driver seat. But he had good reason to fear carnivals. Carnivals were like the incestuous backwoods cousins of circuses – instead of ringleaders and tigers they had the world's fattest woman and the world's tiniest horse. His face morphed into a scowl - he blamed Sam for his current predicament.

Carly suddenly jerked up from her daze interrupting his thoughts. "Where are you going?" She asked.

Freddie's eyes flashed toward her face in confusion before quickly returning his attention to the road. "Ummm, to pick up Sam?" The confusion carried from his face to his voice.

"She doesn't need a ride. She told me she talked to you about it."

"Well, she didn't." Freddie stated matter-of-factly as he continued in the direction of Sam's house.

"Well, turn around. The carnival is on the other side of town." He could tell her exasperation was growing as she glanced at the time.

Freddie refused to meet her eyes or her tone. "We are almost there. Plus, Sam's not getting out of this. This whole iCarly carnival bit was her idea."

"She's _coming_ to the carnival."

Freddie's cocked his head and his features folded over one another as he attempted to fully comprehend the situation. "But…wait, what?"

Carly took a long breath before facing her clueless friend. "She is coming to the carnival. She just doesn't need a ride. She went with Cameron earlier."

"Oh." Freddie looked ahead silently for several seconds. "Cameron Hanson?" He finally asked.

"Yeah." Carly examined Freddie for a long moment but to his own dismay she refused to offer any further details.

"Like on a date?"

She shrugged. "I guess. Who knows? I mean, its _Sam_. Her last date ended with semi-pornographic photographs and stolen undergarments."

"Yeah." Freddie locked his gaze on the road ahead as he swiftly made a U-turn, an illegal move that was not part of his usual driver repertoire, and made his way back towards downtown Seattle. He attempted to settle his anger. It made no sense to be so angry about this. So he drove a few miles out of his way -- Sam did this kind of stuff all the time. In fact, in the grand scheme of Sam issues, this was relatively harmless. But he was angry. Seriously angry. _Cameron Hanson? Cameron-freakin-Hanson?_

"Are you okay?" Carly finally asked after watching Freddie's expression grow angrier with each passing second.

"Yeah, I mean, it's just, Sam's so selfish!" He slapped the steering wheel for effect.

Carly rolled her eyes. "Yeah but you know, same leopard, same spots."

He grunted, trying to ignore the stinging in his palm. "I guess."

The rest of the car ride was spent in an uncomfortable silence. The old blue Volvo finally pulled into the carnival gates and Freddie parked on the farthest end of the lot. Carly got out quickly and he silently followed her to the carnival entrance as his camera bag bumped against his hip.

She looked around nervously and scanned the crowds of laughing families and over-pierced teens for several minutes. Freddie watched her, slightly confused but still too preoccupied by his inexplicable anger with Sam to fully concentrate on anything else. Finally, she turned back to face him. She bit her lip and looked up at him cautiously. "Sam was supposed to meet us here. I guess I'll call her and find out where she is."

"Of course." Freddie kicked an empty popcorn box in frustration. "We'll just wait around for _Sam_."

* * *

After hours of excitement and noise and crowds, the late night air was surprisingly cool and quiet. Sam shoved a piece of fried dough in her mouth and powdered sugar settled on her lips. She collapsed her head on Freddie's shoulder as they made their way through the parking lot.

"So tired." She mumbled through a mouthful of sweet dough.

Freddie shrugged her off and quickened his pace. Sam stared after him for a moment in confusion. He had ignored and insulted her all night. At first she thought it was just a slightly harsher version of their usual banter but the current sinking feeling in her stomach was leading her to believe that this situation was not going to just slowly creep away in between their countless jabs. She rolled her eyes and quickened her pace to match Freddie's long stride.

"What's with you?" She grabbed Freddie's arm and forced him to look at her.

"Nothing." He spat out in reply.

"Oh come on, you've been in a tizzy all night. Is it your time of the month?"

"Sam!" Freddie looked over to Carly for help, but she had settled against a car with her own funnel cake and was clearly just going to lean back and enjoy the show. He spun to face Sam, anger stretching out the veins in his neck and flushing his face. "You expect me and Carly to just be at your beck and call all the time! I am not your personal chauffeur!"

Sam took a half step back and crossed her arms over her chest. "I offer to drive." She replied in a bored tone.

"Not the point! You didn't even have the decency to tell me you didn't need a ride tonight."

"I told Carly! I figured you two would, oh I don't know, _communicate_" Sam swung her arms wildly between the two as she attempted to control her own growing anger. She looked up at Freddie "and I still don't see why you're getting so worked up Freddork. I have done way worse chiz than this."

Carly gave a little nod and grunt in agreement from her perch.

Freddie ignored both of them and continued yelling. "And then, after Carly and I drive all the way across town for no reason whatsoever, _you_ don't even meet us when you said you would, and surprise, surprise, you forgot to charge your cell phone, so we have to search all over the carnival for you - amongst all the freaks and hicks, and your other kin!" Sam watched wordlessly as Freddie began to angrily pace in front of her. She hadn't seen him like this in a long time, but for the life of her she couldn't figure out why _this_ had set him off.

"Freddie…"

"And why do we go through all of this? Because _you_wanted to spend some more time with _Cameron Hanson_ so he could win you a stuffed alien at the freakin' ring toss!" He stopped pacing and stared back at her.

"Is that what this is all about?" Sam half laughed in disbelief. "You aren't mad at me because I'm irresponsible and selfish…"

"Yes I am!"

"You're mad because I was hanging out with Cameron Hanson!"

"No, I'm not!"

"You are so stupid."

"I'm not mad that you went out with that tool."

Sam lifted her eyebrows skeptically. "Tool?"

"Yes! Tool! Have you seen the walls in the boy's bathroom at Ridgeway? He tortures people via sharpie!"

Sam rolled her eyes and waved away his anger nonchalantly. "You're just mad because he said you were a mama's boy in ninth grade."

"No! He didn't _say_ anything, he _wrote_ 'Freddie Benson still breast feeds' on the bathroom wall – every week – for the entire year!"

Carly perked up. "Is that why people made suckling noises at you all the time?" She asked curiously.

Freddie briefly turned his attention to the brunette and Sam attempted unsuccessfully to choke back a laugh.

Freddie spun on her, steam practically billowing out of his ears and his eyes bulging out of his head.

"OH! So it's FUNNY! We'll see how funny you think it is when your precious _Cameron_ writes about you on the bathroom wall. I can just see it now _Sam Puckett is an insecure skunk bag who gives it up for fried chicken!_" Freddie mimed writing out his words in the air between him and Sam.

She glared at him, the situation had quickly intensified and she was forcefully trying to hold herself back but Freddie was seriously toeing the line.

She narrowed her eyes and shoved her hands in her pockets, her half eaten funnel cake forgotten on the cool pavement beside her. "Is that really what you think Benson?" The words were said in a harsh and somewhat sarcastic manner to disguise the intensity behind the question.

He smiled in a taunting way and shrugged one shoulder. "Like mother, like daughter."

Sam stared at him in a stunned silence. Carly, sensing the change in the mood, quickly and wisely abandoned her perch against the warm hood of the car and moved between her two furious friends. Sam couldn't think, she couldn't breathe. The only thing she knew was that she was furious, and she wanted to continuously punch Freddie until his words stopped ringing in her head.

"Sam…" Tones of warning and caution tainted Carly's voice as she firmly placed a hand on Sam's arm to prevent any sudden attacks.

Sam didn't respond. She just stared straight ahead at the soon to be black and blue boy who was smirking victoriously in front of her. She was going to remove that smug look from his face and replace it on his butt.

Right as she attempted to shrug Carly off, a family of five casually strolled by the three teenagers, blissfully unaware of the escalating situation. One of the children dropped their stuffed basketball and it rolled over to rest by Sam's beat up converse sneakers. It took a moment to register, but eventually she picked it up and tossed it back to the kid.

The innocence and charm of the interruption seemed to have curbed her murderous intentions, and all that was left was the complete nausea of hurt. She stared at Freddie for a minute longer, and even though the smirk had faded, looking at him was only making her feel like she was going to lose the two funnel cakes and countless other fried foods she had indulged on that much sooner. She shook her head slowly and spoke just as she saw Freddie begin to open his mouth hesitantly. "You're not worth it." And with that, she spun on her heel and walked back towards the carnival, away from Freddie and Carly who stood in a stunned silence behind her.

* * *

Freddie drummed his fingers on the steering wheel nervously as he mentally practiced his speech in his head. _Sam, I'm sorry. __I don't think you're a skunk bag and I know that you wouldn't give it up for fried chicken. And your mom is lovely._ After a few moments, he groaned and dropped his head in his hands. There was no point in speeches. As soon as Sam saw him she was going to throw her infamous right hook in his direction and he would be out for the count. He groaned again and debated leaving for the hundredth time. He went so far as to turn the car on and shift it into drive. He was sure that Sam would be more receptive of his apology if she had a couple days to cool down. Plus, at school on Monday there would be witnesses, and Sam wouldn't _kill_ him in front of a bunch of witnesses. At least, he hoped not.

He sighed as he threw the car back in park and switched off the ignition. He knew he had to do it tonight. He looked towards the slightly run down house as a cat lazily swatted at a moth in the tiny patch of grass out front. All the front windows were lit up, but covered by various forms of shades, curtains, and blinds. He glanced up at the large window on the second floor he knew was part of Sam's bedroom. Slants of soft light creased out from the bent blinds and he imagined her in there plotting some evil genius revenge against him or mutilating a Freddie doll. Freddie let out a guttural moan as he laid his head against the cool steering wheel. He called her an insecure skunk bag, and according to Carly's rant on the way home earlier, he had implied that she and her mom were both "_harlots". _Insulting Sam's mom after calling her insecure _and _a skunk bag was like calling up a hit man and personally ordering your own demise. Freddie groaned again and rubbed his head. He needed to figure out a better speech.

Suddenly the passenger door swung open and the blonde in question climbed in. She shut the door behind her, cranked down the window, and propped her knee out into the cool night air before finally facing a shocked and frightened Freddie.

"Is stalking a favorite past time of your's Benson?" She asked coldly.

"I was just about to come in and talk to you." He mumbled in reply, shocked by her sudden proximity.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I guess you have been just about to come in and talk to me for the last two hours. My mom was ready to call the police. She was convinced you were this inmate she has been dating online."

Freddie shot her a questioning look.

"Don't ask."

He nodded and turned his attention back to the steering wheel. They sat in silence for a long and awkward minute as Freddie tried to figure out where to start. Neither of them looked at the other. Finally, Sam cleared her throat.

"Well, this has been fun and all, but I have a burrito in the microwave, so if you'll excuse me…" Her knee fell out of the window and she reached for the handle.

"Wait!" Freddie took a deep breath and attempted to control the volume and tone of his voice. "Just give me a minute; I want to talk to you."

Sam stared at him.

"Please?" He added.

She shrugged and settled her knee back into its previous position. The cool night air from the open window drifted through the car and Freddie let out an involuntary shudder.

He was nervous but he was encouraged by the fact that she had stayed, and the fact that he currently remained unharmed.

"I'm sorry for, you know, for what I said." He stumbled over his words and stared down at his hands.

"You mean for calling me an insecure skank bag?" Sam asked sharply.

"Skunk bag actually…" Freddie trailed off when he caught Sam's eye. "Yeah, for that."

"Whatever." Sam replied flatly.

"I shouldn't have said it."

"You implied that I would hook up with a guy for a drumstick. And that my mom was a hussy—and that I was just like her." She spat out, still refusing to look up at him.

Freddie pushed his hair off his forehead and turned away from Sam's hurt tone to look out at the abandoned street. He gathered his thoughts and his nerves and turned back to her bent head. "I didn't mean for it to come out like that, I didn't mean it at all, it's just…"

Sam finally looked up at him.

"I really hate that guy!" Freddie bit the inside of his mouth and attempted to find the right words that would effectively express his frustration without further angering the hotheaded blonde beside him. "I hate that _you_were with _him_ tonight."

Sam's angry and set jaw twitched as she seemed to consider his words. Finally, she sighed and looked over at him. "I know" she replied.

"You do?" He was surprised, shocked, flabbergasted. He didn't fully understand what was going on himself, where these feelings and frustrations emerged from, but she was saying she already knew?

"Yeah, I was in the boy's bathroom a lot in 9th grade- for various good causes- and I knew that Cameron wrote that stuff about you." She picked at a strand of her long blonde hair aimlessly. "That's why I didn't tell you about tonight."

"Oh" Freddie looked momentarily relieved "but you told Carly you forgot to tell me."

She waved off his reasoning. "Yeah. I lie --- do you not know me at all?"

Freddie let out a small laugh before the car settled again into silence.

"I really am sorry Sam."

She looked at him, studying him for several seconds before sighing heavily. "Whatever Freddork. Let's just forget it."

He nodded quickly in relief and drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "So --- how was it?" He gulped back his nausea and attempted to portray something approximate to sincere curiosity.

"The date?"

He nodded.

"Meh, it was cool, I guess. I mean I got a stuffed alien head out of it, which I find freaky but strangely charming."

"You would."

Sam smirked. "It's weird; I think he might actually like me."

Freddie gulped lightly at the poorly disguised elation in her voice before returning her smirk and nudging her arm. "It's not that weird."

She shrugged casually. "He still has to pass the test though."

"You still do the test?" Freddie shot her a flat look. "I thought Carly said she wouldn't do it anymore."

She narrowed her eyes. "Oh, she'll do it. I continuously imply that the only reason she won't do it is because she secretly thinks the guy will fail until she finally gives in."

He shook his head in disbelief. "That is so twisted."

She huffed in offense. "The test has saved me from multiple bad relationships."

"_One_ bad relationship Sam. Only one guy has ever failed your little test."

"_Two _guys dorkface."

"You can't count Jonah, officially he never even took the test."

"Jonah is the whole reason for the test. Jonah is the founding father of the test, so yes Freddie, I can count Jonah."

Freddie let out a heavy sigh and rolled his eyes.

"Well I think the test is stupid and unfair, plus isn't it entrapment?"

Sam shot him a look. "Do you think I know what entrapment is?"

"Entrapment is making all of your potential boyfriends pass some absurd fidelity test using your best friend as bait."

Sam nodded slowly. "Then yes. It is definitely entrapment." Freddie rolled his eyes and cocked his eyebrow but opted not to further comment in favor of preserving the thin peace they had somehow discovered. They settled back into a comfortable silence, both relieved that the earlier tensions seemed to have dissolved.

Sam eventually broke the silence and rolled her head over to face Freddie. "So what about you?" She spoke in a flat tone and pursed her lips.

He returned her gaze with a questioning look. "Me?"

She rolled her eyes, frustrated somehow by his inability to read her mind and at being forced to say the words outright. "Yeah. Which lucky lady will receive your stuffed alien head?"

Freddie turned back to the road and tried to hide his discomfort. "I don't know."

She punched him, not hard enough to cause pain, but not light enough to be considered completely playful. "Come on – we're friends now." She wrinkled her nose and her pupils drifted to the side in consideration. "Well sort of."

He lightly shoved her back. "We're friends" he insisted with a short laugh. She rolled her eyes and smiled but refused to speak, letting her previous question hang uncomfortably in the air between them. After several moments of silence she raised her eyebrows in expectation and shot him a look.

Freddie let out a long, shallow sigh. "There really isn't anyone I like right now." She scoffed and he looked back at her in frustration. "I'm serious."

Her face slowly changed from one of mocking disbelief to one of thoughtful consideration. She nodded twice and broke out in a smirk. "Well, you'll let me know when your next obsession starts? I like to give the girl fair warning before she's bombarded with dead roses and computer laden poetry."

Freddie frowned playfully. "I never left anyone dead roses – and Julie Beck said that me calling her my motherboard was the most romantic thing she had ever heard."

Sam smiled and lightly shook her head. "Keep telling yourself that stud."

They settled again in silence.

After a few minutes, Sam let out a long yawn. "Well, my burrito is not going to eat itself."

Freddie began nervously gripping and re-gripping the steering wheel. "Yeah, I guess it is kind of late." He looked over at Sam who was pulling herself into an upright position in anticipation of soon exiting the car. He debated asking her to stay. "See you tomorrow?"

Sam yawned again as she stretched out the kinks that had worked their way into her muscles. "Yeah." She opened the door and got out of the car. Freddie reached down and turned the key in the ignition.

As she exited, Sam shifted her weight and rested her arm on the open door and she leaned back into the Volvo. "You know, in 9th grade, there were some pretty heinous things written about Cameron on the girl's bathroom wall." Freddie stared back at her in shock. Sam smirked in her infuriating way and with a slam and a dash of blonde hair, she was gone.

**

**A/N There you have it - chapter 3, formerly known as chapter 2. Sorry it took a little longer than usual to update. I had it uploaded and ready to post on Thursday night, but then I re-read it for the hundreth time and it just didn't seem right, so I held onto it. To be honest, it still feels slightly off, but I couldn't figure out why, so therefore I couldn't fix the problem, so I decided screw it, and posted it anyways. If you enjoyed it or have any feedback, please review. **


	5. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: iCarly is all Schneider's and Nickelodeon's.

Chapter 4

March 31

Sam shoved her books in her locker, attempting to shake the lingering smell of formaldehyde and forget the last hour and half of her life. She loved dead pigs - in the form of bacon, ham, and other delicious pork products - but she did not love dead pigs when they were laid out on a lab table in front of her, staring up at her accusingly with blank, glassy eyes. She never thought she would be one to get squeamish during the dissection lab, but she couldn't deny the heavy nauseous feeling settling in her stomach. She shuddered as she slammed her locker and looked around the hall for some form of a distraction. It was at this point she realized she was completely alone – the tumbleweeds rolling past and crickets chirping type of alone. Sam frowned in confusion as she reached into her pocket and retrieved her cell phone. Glancing at the time confirmed what she already knew. Lunch was set to start in three minutes. The hall should be crammed with juniors fetching their ham and cheese sandwiches and cup of noodles while meeting their friends before heading to the cafeteria. But there wasn't a single person in sight. Sam headed to the double exit door to determine whether or not she had somehow missed a fire drill when a flash of dockers and hair gel came crashing into her.

"Gibby." Sam growled as she surveyed the maze of limbs entangled with her own.

Gibby's eyes grew wide as he registered what he had hit.

"Sam. You're – ummm – you are looking well." He cowered and ducked his head beneath the arm which wasn't pinned beneath the simmering blonde.

"Get. Off. Of. Me." Sam threw out a few elbows and felt deep satisfaction when she felt the familiar connection with soft nose tissue.

"Oooof! I dink you boke mibe nose." Gibby spluttered as he clutched his face in pain.

"Don't run in the halls Gibby." Sam snapped in reply as she stood up and brushed off her black jeans.

Gibby slowly stood up as well and leaned his head back in a misguided attempt to curtail the bleeding. "I wub running because ub the fight."

Sam's face lit up and she grabbed Gibby's shirt collar and pulled him towards her. "What fight? Where?"

"Outdide deh gym."

Sam dropped him back to the floor and quickly made her way to the exit.

"Don't forget to tell the nurse it was an accident Gibby!" She yelled behind her as she made her way across the quad and over to the massive four story gym. From a distance she could already make out the crowd of students surrounding the fight. She scanned the backs of the heads hoping to spot a familiar one. In a few seconds, she was approaching Carly who was standing on the outskirt of the crowd, biting furiously at her nails and occasionally jumping up and down in an attempt to see over the countless other heads in front of her.

"What's up?" Sam clutched her red and black backpack tightly and anxiously took a step towards the mayhem. "Who's fighting?" She shot Carly a big smile as she took another step forward, ready to abandon her friend momentarily in order to get a better view of the action.

"Freddie!" Carly's face contorted in fear and shock. She abandoned the sad remains that used to be her nails and was now gnawing on her knuckles.

"What?!" Sam looked back towards the crowd with a new found respect for the situation. "Did our dork go off to Oz and get himself some courage?"

Carly spun around furiously to face her. "The wizard clearly hasn't gotten around to your heart yet!"

Sam took a step back, letting the insult deliver the invisible punch it intended.

"Woah - Carls, I…"

"He's fighting to defend your honor!"

"What? Why? Who?" Sam looked back at the crowd and could only imagine what type of condition Freddie was in. Freddie was a lot of things, but a fighter was not one of them. And why for the love of cheese would he fight for her? I mean Carly was the type of girl that needed a boy's protective urges. Sam Puckett? Not so much. "He's such an idiot." She mumbled.

Carly ignored her comment and instead looked down at the ground and began wringing her restless hands together. "He's fighting Cameron – ummm we heard him in Physics talking about hooking up with Missy Wetherington last night."

Sam stared in confusion at the top of Carly's bowed head. "So? That's Missy's problem - among other things, like the fact her name is _Missy_."

Carly jerked her head up to meet her eyes. "Sam, you don't care that your boyfriend was cheating on you?" She asked incredulously.

"Cheating? What?" Understanding slowly dawned on Sam's face as she looked between the crowd and Carly. "Oh crap."

Sam spun on her heels and shoved her way into the crowd. It took several seconds to make her way through the screaming and cheering teens, and one particularly dense section surrounding Ripoff Rodney proved extremely troublesome, but she eventually emerged right behind Cameron. Cameron was facing off against some hulk like blob that was formerly known as Freddie Benson. Freddie's shirt was ripped and blood was smeared across his right cheek. He held his fist clenched by his side and Sam could see the scattering of cuts and yellowing bruises. She grabbed the person nearest to her.

"How long has this been going on?"

The scrawny freshman boy shrugged. "I have been here for 15 minutes but they were already going at it when I got here. Someone told me a bunch of Cameron's teammates are distracting the teachers."

Sam groaned as she again surveyed the scene. It appeared that Freddie and Cameron were taking a mutual break, but neither of them relaxed their stance. Her mind reeled as she looked around, hoping for some ingenious plan that would allow her to extract Freddie from the present situation with the least amount of damage to his face and ego. Her eyes rested on the beefy wrestler to her left, who was taunting the two motionless boys in the circle. His face was red and the veins in his over muscled arms bulged alarmingly.

Sam scooted closer to him and attempted to whisper in his direction. Considering the noise level surrounding them, the whisper ended up more like a yell.

"Is that Cameron Hanson?"

He turned toward her excitedly. "Yeah!"

Sam cringed as spit and sweat flew in her direction. She attempted to subtly wipe off her face as she continued to whisper/yell conspiratorially towards him.

"From the soccer team?"

He didn't turn from the scene in front of him but he nodded to acknowledge and answer Sam's question.

"That other one must be a wrestler then, right?" She asked.

This caught his attention and he turned his thick neck to look at Sam in mild disbelief. "Him? Hell no."

Sam held his gaze. "Really? Huh. I just assumed because Cameron is always mouthing off about how he could take down anyone from the wrestling team - anyplace, anytime." She threw a few punches into the air for good measure.

The veins bulged. "What?"

"Yeah, he says all he would have to do is wave something shiny and point and the rest would be like taking candy from a baby."

Sam had turned her attention back to the two boys, now circling each other in tribute to some horrible movie cliché. One look at Cameron's face told her that the ceasefire was not going to last much longer. She turned back around to the wrestler, who appeared angry and confused.

"Huh?"

Sam willfully prevented her arms from swinging up in exasperation. "He says you're stupid and ugly and weak!" She shouted, and suddenly it was like the oversized ogre next to her was actually an oversized toy, and she had just pulled the string and sent it into action. He leapt into the circle and swiftly took Cameron to the ground. The crowd was stunned into silence for a fraction of a second as people gaped at the change of events. Sam briefly caught sight of Carly's bobbing head as she frantically screamed "what happened?" Ripoff Rodney was bellowing orders to the betters surrounding him as Sam swooped into the circle and grabbed Freddie's stunned hand.

"Time to go tiger." She pulled him through the crowd and frantically searched for a viable hideout. She considered the gym, but then she considered the gym teacher who was most certainly enjoying his lunch in his office right in site of the front doors. She could try and get Freddie back to his car, but that was on the other side of the school and she would have to pass back around the crowd of cheering teens in order to get there. Sam sighed. The shock advantage was rapidly wearing off and Freddie was beginning to grunt in delayed protest as he feebly attempted to pull her back towards the fight. She clutched his hand tighter and quickly made her way behind the gym. She shoved Freddie through the outside door to a rarely used staircase and pulled out her phone to dial the familiar numbers. Carly's frantic voice carried through the speakers and Sam held the phone away from her to preserve her eardrums.

"Where are you!? What happened? Is Freddie all right?"

"I'm in the gym's back stairwell. Use the outside entrance." She yelled aimlessly at the distant phone before looking down at the pathetic lump slumped up against the wall. "I have Rocky with me." She added before she hung up and sat down on the step beside Freddie, who had begun to groan.

Sam reached out a tentative finger towards the yellowing skin surrounding his left eye and he instinctively flinched away from her touch.

"You're gonna have a black eye." She smirked "Chicks dig black eyes."

Freddie examined the rip in the bottom of his shirt. Several buttons were missing and a half of the hem was hanging on by threads. "Well there's the silver lining I was looking for." He replied without emotion before wincing in pain.

Sam nudged him gently. "What were you thinking Fredward? A weakling like you - you could have permanently damaged that babyface of yours." He rested his head in his hands and groaned again. Finally, he looked up and opened his mouth to respond as the door in front of them flung open.

"Oh my god! Freddie! Are you okay? You don't look okay." Carly paused to catch her breath. "You're bleeding! Get up, we need to get you to the nurse." She leaned down to offer Freddie her arm for support.

"We can't take him to the nurse Carly."

"What? Why not? He needs medical attention!"

"Okay then lets take him to the nurse, and she'll lovingly repair his black eye _and _his split lip _and _his cracked knuckles with ointment and lollipops and then she'll turn right around and call Principal Franklin and Mrs. Benson."

Freddie paled. "She can't call my mom."

"Fighting is a strict no-no, and for _that_ epic scene, Freddie will likely get suspended."

Freddie looked up at Carly with fear and pleading. "My mom will kill me. And then she will kill herself. It will be a homicide/suicide! We'll be in the papers."

Carly threw up her arms in defeat. "Fine! Then what are we supposed to do?"

Sam suddenly took control. "Go get some ice from the cafeteria. And a couple plastic bags – they're in the drawer next to the oven – and a dishcloth from the bin next to the walk-in, and the plastic first aid box next to the cutting board and-- what's today?"

Carly was mentally repeating Sam's instructions. "Thursday" she replied automatically.

"and 4 corndogs from the serving dish on the back counter- you got it all?"

"I got it!" Carly disappeared through the door and Sam turned back to Freddie.

"I might not have lollipops, but I can get your fried meat on a stick."

Freddie cracked a half smile and then cringed as his lip began to bleed.

"Hold on, I'll be right back." Sam quickly got up and ran up the stairs two at a time. She emerged on the second floor of the gym and expertly made her way to the old girl's locker room that was only used by away teams during basketball season. She grabbed some old paper towels and doused one with cold water and one with warm water. She hurried back to the stairwell and flew down to the first floor landing where Freddie was grimacing in pain.

Sam plopped down beside him and reached for his chin. Freddie again flinched from her touch and half turned to face the wall.

"I need your face Freddie. And trust me, it pains me to utter those five words." Freddie cracked another half smile despite himself and when the blood began to drip down his chin he grunted and turned to face Sam.

She gently grabbed his chin and scooted closer to him on the low step. She dabbed his lip with the cold wet paper towel.

Freddie's jaw flexed in shock and pain. "This is so humiliating."

Sam narrowed her eyes, half in concentration and half in frustration. "For me too dork, I'm the one licking your wounds." She leaned in and gently smoothed away the dried blood surrounding the cut. Her soft and steady breaths brushed the downy face hairs that outlined his jaw. She considered for a moment how close they were, how with just a slight turn of her head and one more little scoot forward, she and Freddie would be in a seriously intimate situation. She found her body begin to involuntarily make the movements when Freddie's voice suddenly demanded her return to reality.

"You should see the other guy."

Sam smiled and scoffed softly as she shook off her dalliance with insanity and examined the freshly cleaned cut. She dabbed it again with the cold paper towel and gently blew on Freddie's lip. She felt him tense beside her and wondered briefly if he also was uncomfortably aware of how her knee was nestled between his and her lips were inches from his own. She switched out the now blood covered cold paper towel with the clean warm one and set to work on the dried blood on Freddie's cheek.

"You're such a badass now." Sam swiped gently against his face with the paper towel, folded it over on itself and repeated the action.

Freddie attempted to roll his eyes but had trouble tearing them away from Sam's intent face. He settled instead for a scoff. "Right."

"Seriously. I feel like we should play 'Eye of the Tiger' and you can run up and down these stairs a few times."

Freddie let out a low laugh that vibrated in her hand which still cradled his jaw. She completed cleaning his cheek and had revealed the source of the blood as a shallow but long cut beneath his eye. She stroked her thumb across it gently and met Freddie's serious gaze. She didn't move back, but the hand holding his chin dropped down by her side. She kept her thumb on his cheek and was moving it gently back and forth.

When she finally spoke, her voice sounded gravelly and unsure. "Seriously Benson, what the hell were you thinking?"

Freddie's gaze fell for a second before he retrained it on Sam. He took a deep breath and she moved to remove her hand from his face but he reached up for it and held it in place. After a silent and tense moment, he gently grasped her hand and moved it away from his cheek and into his lap. He examined her fingers and rubbed circles across her knuckles.

"He's cheating on you."

Sam gently pulled her hand away and looked towards the door. She attempted to determine how long it would be before Carly returned. She figured at most a couple more minutes. She felt Freddie's worried eyes burning a hole in the side of her face and she assumed he was misreading her silence as some semblance of sorrow over the blow he just delivered. Sam hated pity.

"He didn't cheat on me, you idiot."

Freddie remained silent for a long moment until Sam was finally forced to look back at him.

"Sam, Carly and I both heard him talking about it in Physics. He was telling Kerry Shore about how he was with Missy Wetherington last night, and I know you may not want to hear it, but…"

"We broke up Freddie."

Freddie's mouth hung open and he stared at Sam in confusion.

"Wait, what? When?"

"I don't know, a few days ago." She shrugged. "I don't remember the exact date."

"And you didn't tell me?" Hurt and anger mixed to morph the smooth features of Freddie's battered and bruised countenance.

"I didn't think about it. I didn't think you would go all Schwarzenegger on his ass." Sam lamely punched the air and attempted a half smile to smooth out the intense situation.

"You didn't think about it?" He kicked his foot against the wall in anger.

"Come on Fredwad, I didn't tell Carly either, I mean we only went out for like a month, it really wasn't a big deal."

Freddie glared at her, clenching and unclenching his jaw in anger and frustration.

"You just don't get it, do you?"

Sam's half smirk quickly flattened as she stared quizzically at Freddie. "Don't get what?"

At that exact moment Carly burst through the door, her hair a bit mussed and her arms full.

"I got everything!" The crazed look in her eye switched from Sam to Freddie and back to Sam again.

Sam turned from Freddie and examined Carly closely, thanking the powers above for the perfect timing of her friend. "Where are the corndogs?"

*

**A/N: There you have it. Let me know what you thought!**


	6. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: You know the drill - I own nothing.

Chapter 5

April 11

Freddie walked into the studio and was surprised to find it devoid of its normal activity. A quick glance around confirmed his suspicions and he wondered idly where the two regular occupants were.

Suddenly, the door swung open behind him and Sam slumped in, she grunted in his direction before throwing down her bag towards the pile of beanbags in the middle of the floor and settling herself in the center seat of the car in the corner. She slumped over the frame of the car and moaned dramatically. Freddie frowned and slowly made his way towards her. He settled himself in the seat beside her.

"Sam."

"Ehhhhhhh." She whined and remained motionless.

He quirked an eyebrow and poked her in the side. "What's wrong with you?"

Suddenly she sat up, blonde hair flying behind her in every direction. "Carly is in the shower."

Freddie's already quirked eyebrow perched higher on his forehead as he shot her a questioning look. Sam sighed and continued "she has been in the shower for the last hour."

His lips formed a small circle in understanding. "Oh."

She nodded her head slowly before letting it fall back carelessly against the red leather seat. "We're fighting."

Freddie remained silent as Sam crossed her arms and looked around the crowded studio. After a long moment she finally turned back to Freddie. "Are you going to say anything?" she asked impatiently.

He shrugged. "What are you fighting about?"

She rolled her eyes. "Nothing----everything. I don't really know." He chose not to comment on her vagueness and waited for her to continue. She finally let out a long sigh and looked down. "_Maybe_ I'm being difficult."

"Nooooo." He drew out the word, giving the sarcasm sufficient time to fully sink in.

"Yeah, yeah." She nudged him hard with her shoulder before settling against him. He suddenly became completely aware of how close they were. Her sharp shoulder against his seemed to contradict, so he instinctively lifted his arm and placed it around her, half propping it against the back of the bench seat and half leaning it against her body. As an immediate effect of his move, her body shifted to comfortably fall in the nook of his arm.

Her expression changed slightly and his boldness dissipated and was instantly replaced with fear and stress as he watched her for further reaction. But her eyes were unfocused and the worried expression on her face was distracted away from the current situation. He gathered a deep breath as he tried to concentrate on the situation at hand and _not_ on the way she felt against him.

She stared down at her hands. "It's just---everything's changing."

He folded his face in confusion. "What do you mean?"

She sucked in her breath and looked up at him in frustration. Freddie frequently got the distinct impression that Sam wished she could communicate without words. "I don't know Freddork – I mean just look at----" she stared up at him for a second, flitting her gaze for the first time over their new position, her eyes crinkled with indecision as she trailed off. She looked down suddenly and seemed to change her direction. "Carly wants to change the night we air iCarly."

Freddie coaxed down the butterflies in his stomach and pasted a confused expression on his face. "What? Why?"

Sam sighed. "Take a wild guess."

"Peter?" he asked incredulously, naming Carly's longtime boyfriend.

"Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding, tell the nub what he's won Johnny!"

He ignored her antics and bit his lip in confusion. "But why does it matter what night we air iCarly?"

Sam rolled her eyes. "It doesn't matter now – but next year…"

Freddie nodded in sudden understanding. Carly would want to be able to visit Peter during weekends when he was at college next year. "Ahhh." He let silence fall around them before finally continuing his thought. "But why do you care so much?"

She shot a cold glare his way. "I don't!" He returned her cold glare with a calm and skeptical gaze. She sighed in mild frustration and threw up her arms. "Is it too much to ask for a little stability in my life!"

Freddie frowned and sought out the deeper meanings in her words. Sam never talked much about her home, and they often joked about her crazy relatives, but it was a well established fact that Carly, Spencer, and Freddie were more of a family to her than anyone else in her life.

"Sam---" He said her name softly, gently even, so needless to say he was slightly shocked when she elbowed his side - hard - and steadied her own steely blue eyes on his.

"I'm not trying to have any deep, emotional self revelations Fredward, so move on."

He sighed, letting his own exasperation finally peek through. "Well, what then?"

She pushed at her bangs and extracted herself from the car, his arm falling lamely at his side in her absence. "Nothing." With that she looked over at the studio door. She bounced on her feet for a moment before turning back to Freddie with a mischievous glint reflected in her eyes. "Let's blow this joint."

He frowned. "And go where?"

Sam steadily strolled around the car and towards him. She roughly grabbed his arm to wrench him out of the small car, ignoring his painful protests. "Who cares? Let's just get in your soccer-mom-mobile and drive."

He whined at her tugging. "We're not Thelma and Louise Sam."

She briefly halted and looked back at him "Bonnie and Clyde would have been a much cooler reference Fredward. Especially considering both Thelma and Louise were chicks." He frowned in brief contemplation and she used the moment to gain significant ground with her tugging.

Freddie attempted to prevent her from dragging him out of the room by digging his heels into the floor. "I'm not letting you drive Sam."

She rolled her eyes and continued to pull at him. "Yeah, yeah. You're a stickler for the license thing, I get it. You drive, I'll DJ."

Freddie gave a hard tug and prevented the small but surprisingly strong blonde from pulling him any further. "Stop it Sam."

She did stop, to what appeared to be their mutual surprise, and she turned to face him stonily. "What?"

Freddie took a deep breath and steadied his nerves before looking the angry girl in the eyes. "Listen – I know you have all these walls or whatever, but it's clear you're hurting right now and I think it would be best--"

In two long strides she was across the room with him in a headlock and her hand firmly over his mouth. "Seriously dude – I will punch you." The words came out more as a growl and left no room for doubt of their intention.

He squirmed and attempted to protest but her hand was tightly preventing any intelligible communication making its way through. Finally he gave up any pretense of maturity within the situation and licked the length of her palm. She immediately pushed his face away and furiously wiped her hand off on her jeans. He stumbled back before standing upright and quickly began spitting and spluttering in a way to match her own disgust. After he completed his part of the charade, he looked up to see her standing silently across from him, hands tightly folded and partially obscured by the long sleeves of her striped shirt. She silently challenged him in her expression and her stance and Freddie readied himself for the oncoming battle. This was what they did after all. This was _normal_ – sitting in cars thinking about the smell of Sam's hair and how good she felt against him – _not normal_; racking his brain for plausible verbal ammunition against her – _normal. _He mentally sorted through the collection of insults he had and ultimately decided to go for the unclean angle. Perhaps not the most original tactic but certainly the most pertinent to the current situation, and he cringed to himself slightly when he actually considered the relative cleanliness of the hand he just licked. She smirked at him from her position and he knew from her look that she was well aware what he was thinking. That was the problem; Sam was always one step ahead.

Freddie sighed and stored away the insults he had been automatically composing and opted instead to stroll purposefully past her, enjoying immensely the brief but total shock reflected on her face. When he reached the door he turned to her. "Coming?" he asked calmly.

She looked suspicious. "Where to Benson?"

He mirrored her earlier smirk and reply. "Who cares?"

* * *

Freddie tapped nervously against the steering wheel. Okay, driving aimlessly through Seattle may have _seemed_like a good idea, but in reality, he wasn't so sure. Sam had remained unsettlingly quiet throughout the entire half hour, clicking away at his PearPod and pointedly avoiding looking in his direction. The song drifting out of the Volvo speakers abruptly changed after less than a minute and Freddie glanced over at her in frustration.

"Most DJs I know let a song play all the way through."

She scoffed and didn't look up from the task at hand. "You don't know any DJs."

He shook his head. "Why don't you just pick a playlist and let it play?"

She looked up at him briefly. "Because Freddork, I can't find a playlist that doesn't include numerous selections from boy bands from like ten years ago."

"Carly made those playlists" he mumbled in reply.

She laughed but chose to remain relatively silent, though he did make out some incomprehensible mumbling about 'hair gel'.

She finally did set the PearPod down between them, efficiently tangling the attached cord to the tape deck, and instead concentrated on the passing scenery out the window.

"So-" Freddie searched his mind for a safe topic of conversation. "Your 18th birthday is coming up – any plans?" He, of course, knew that the day would be spent with him and Carly and thirty of their other closest friends in the Shay apartment. They were throwing her a jailbait themed surprise party. From the look Sam shot him, he had a sneaking suspicion that she might be aware of this as well.

She didn't give anything away though, and instead shrugged and jutted out her lower lip in an expression of teasing nonchalance. "I dunno – I figured I would pawn any of the lame gifts I get so I can buy cartons of cigarettes and lottery tickets." She stretched languidly before continuing in the same flat tone. "Then I figured I would finally admit my undying love for Spencer and seduce him in a hot tub full of pudding."

Freddie gulped as suddenly unwanted images filled his mind. He laughed awkwardly as she rolled her eyes and turned back to the window, effectively cutting off any further attempts at conversation.

Finally, after working his way up the curving and deserted roads of the Parkway, he pulled over into a small patch of dead grass.

Sam looked up, pursing her lips in confusion. "Why are we stopping?"

"Because---" he pushed against the steering wheel and stretched out in his seat. "have you seen fuel prices lately?"

She rolled her eyes and mumbled "whatever" before picking up his PearPod and again shuffling through it.

He leaned back against his door and examined her for several minutes, before she finally looked back at him and shot him a frustrated and questioning look accompanied by an incomprehensible whine he assumed was meant to portray something along the lines of "what the hell do you want?"

"I know it goes against everything in your nature, but you could try to be slightly less rude considering I am driving your butt all over town."

"Yeah, I don't think so." She shrugged and looked at him. He refused to drop her gaze and instead narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. Finally she rolled her eyes to the ceiling and fell back into her seat. "I'm still a little wound up."

He snorted less than graciously in response. She practiced ignoring him and instead steadied her gaze on the vast forest that lay to the right of the car as the first familiar notes from a popular song began to fill the silence.

"Now _this _is a good song." She nodded her head and a smirk played at her lips as she began bobbing her shoulders and loosening up her arms.

Just as the chorus began, she was hopping out of the car, and within an instant, she was tugging open his door, and leaning across his lap to spin the dial on the tape deck to maximum volume before grabbing the PearPod and presumably repeating the same action. Freddie tried not to splutter at the sudden rush of action and _contact_. "Excuse me!" Sam seem less than bothered though as she pulled herself up and tugged at his arm to join her.

He half fell out of the car as she began to crazily move all around him, her arms waving wildly and her feet never settling on the ground for more than half a second. He was still motionless when he caught a mouthful of her hair as she jerked her head up and down in front of him.

"Come on Freddie!" She had to shout slightly to be heard above the rush of loud music. "We're dancing it out!"

Freddie pursed his lips and crossed his arms in defiance. "I don't have anything to dance out!" He shouted in reply. Whether or not she heard him was unknown, but it was clear she was not going to listen when she grabbed his arm and spun him around her, jerking him awkwardly as she jumped up and down.

Finally he sighed and rolled his shoulders. He threw up his free arm in defeat and immediately began moving with her - mimicking her wild movements to the best of his ability. She dropped her head back and let out a loud laugh before flipping it back upright and smiling brightly at him through the crazy curls obscuring her face. She clutched his attached hand a little tighter and wildly spun into him, lining her back against his chest. He grasped her around the waist, continuing to chuckle and jump before he realized she was motionless against his bouncing form. He tapered off his movement and looked down at her, their sudden lack of movement a stark contrast against the still booming background music. Her chest was moving up and down in heavy gasps as she tried to collect her breath. Their eyes stayed trained on each other's and Sam was smirking, but her eyes reflected some other emotion. Confusion? Nerves? Fear?

In a decision that seemed to require no actual thinking, he began to lean his head down towards her, eyes briefly leaving hers to focus on her slightly damp lips. Her lips parted ever so slightly as she took in a sharp breath, and when he was less than an inch from contact, she let out an unintelligible sound as she dropped their joining hands and collapsed backwards, her arms flinging out carelessly above her head. He managed to catch her weight with his grip around her waist moments before her head crashed against the trodden ground. She laughed, her chest moving up and down with the motion and her long hair collecting dead grass and dirt all along its curled ends.

Freddie re-situated his arm to better support her dead weight and bent down further to add his other arm around her. With a slight grunt he lifted her back to her feet and she stumbled half a step against him. Freddie again was face to face with the infuriating blonde, and he was about to say something about her insane action when he was silenced by her steady gaze. She was smirking and biting her lip, producing a mixed expression of confidence and nerves. She didn't move her arms around him but left them dangling loosely by her sides, leaving his firm grip around her waist as the only strand keeping them tightly connected to one another. The song had ended moments earlier, and it appeared no other song was automatically set to follow, leaving a deafening silence surrounding the two teens. She narrowed her eyes slightly, as if trying to come to terms with something, and then with the tiniest of gulps and the slightest of shoulder shrugs, she titled her face towards his, wide eyes trained on his and filled with mischief and nerves. Just as Freddie was moving to meet her movements, allowing his own eyes to flutter shut and licking his lips in anticipation, a shrill tune filled the air.

After the loud music, and the loud accompanying silence, the song coming from the phone was a relatively quiet and cruel twist of fate, but it had been enough to interrupt the developing scene, and Sam had immediately jumped back and out of his arms. She shuffled awkwardly for half a second before letting out a strangled half laugh and stepping forward again to punch Freddie sharply in the shoulder. He shot her a frustrated look and rubbed his shoulder as he moved towards the car and the demanding ring of his cell phone.

"Was violence really necessary?" He struggled to keep his voice light and normal. She shrugged and skipped over to her side of the car.

"Is it necessary for you to be such a dork?" Freddie couldn't tell if it was a struggle for her to accomplish the light and teasing tone that was her trademark, but she had definitely succeeded. She opened her door and shot him a look from over the top of the car. "Mozart? Really?"

He climbed into the car and reached for his phone which was currently producing docile and classical tones. "It's Tchaikovsky, and it reminds me of a simpler time."

She leaned back in the seat and turned to face him. "Fredwina, it's like you strive to prove my points."

He shook his head and picked up the phone, if only to escape from the current conversation.

"Hello.

"Hey Freddie – it's me."

"Hey Carly." He watched Sam slump further into her seat and turn to the window.

"Where are you, I thought you were going to come by to watch a movie?" She sounded slightly dejected and Freddie tried to push down the accompanying guilt he felt with her tone.

"I came by but you were in the shower – I just figured we were postponing."

"Oh – did you see Sam here?"

"Uh-huh."

"Did you see her leave?"

"Yeah." He attempted to divide his attention between the chattering girl across town and the silent girl right beside him.

Carly let out a heavy sigh into the phone. "Did she say where she was going – I need to talk to her." She paused briefly before continuing. "We're fighting."

Freddie fiddled with the loose seatbelt. "Yeah I know. She's-ummm-actually she's here with me now." He turned slightly to gauge Sam's reaction and though her body tensed slightly, she didn't divert her attention away from the window. Her sudden quiet and stillness was such a vast contrast to all the wild movement and laughter she was only minutes earlier.

"Oh." The one word carried confusion and taints of anger and Freddie inwardly groaned. "Why are you with Sam?" He took a long pause and tried to determine the best way to explain the situation in terms that would appease both girls, but Carly interrupted and saved him the trouble. "You know what – it doesn't matter. Can you just put her on?"

He breathed out a sigh of relief. "Hold on." He covered the phone with the palm of his hand and turned towards Sam. "She wants to talk to you" he directed at her rigid back. Her shoulders lifted and fell and she reached out blindly to request the phone, not allowing Freddie even the slightest glimpse of her hidden expression.

"Hello." She mumbled out the greeting. He watched in amazement as her rigid frame began to slowly relax at the mysterious words coming from the other end of the conversation. She finally shifted her weight to face the windshield and her expression was light and happy. "Yeah, I'm sorry too. We should really never fight dude – it forces me to hang out one-on-one with Freddork." He rolled his eyes as she shot him a teasing smile. "Yeah, I know." She slid forward in her seat and perched her bent knees against the dash. "No – you know maybe I was a little quick to shoot the idea down. Changing iCarly's air date isn't a bad idea." She let out a short, happy laugh and nodded her head. "Yeah – well" she glanced slyly over at Freddie who met her look with a questioning gaze and in response she rolled her eyes and played absentmindedly with her shoestrings "maybe change isn't so bad."

Freddie tuned out the remainder of the conversation to explore his own jumbled thoughts. He knew something was….happening?...with him and Sam, but the question was, did _she_know it. Had she almost kissed him? He spared a glance for his PearPhone out of the corner of his eye and frowned at the technology. Stupid interrupting Tchaikovsky. He knew Sam would act like nothing had happened, and he wasn't going to challenge that. They were good at the forgetting and ignoring part and he didn't trust himself to alter the formula.

In some crevice of his brain he registered Sam's telephone conversation and recognized the tone accompanied with goodbyes. Almost on cue, she stuffed the phone into the cup holder and turned to Freddie.

She smirked happily. "Okay Thelma. To Casa de Shay."

*

**A/N - So, as I mentioned earlier, Chapter 5-10 are my favorite chapters, I hope y'all enjoy them as well.**

**Reading everyone's reviews has been really encouraging and great, so please continue! Let me know what you think...what you like...what you hate...I wanna know the whole shebang.**


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Nothing has changed in the last few days. I still don't own iCarly nor am I profiting from this story.

**A/N - I am saying that the fire escape (from iKiss) is attached to Freddie's apartment. Whether or not that is the case, I don't know. But this is my story, so yeah.**

Chapter 6

May 7

Sam had to mentally encourage herself to climb the last flight of hot metal stairs. It was tempting in the evening heat to just collapse on the 7th landing and take a breezy nap for just a few hours. In the end, it was the cat staring straight at her from the 7th floor window, in a creepy knowing way, that convinced her to put all of her effort into the last twenty steps. She was going to start working out tomorrow – definitely – well, maybe – eh, probably not.

When she reached the desired landing she collapsed into the vaguely familiar camping chair. She took a moment to relax her panting and then stared up in frustration at the window a few feet away – in her current state the distance felt impossible. She rummaged through her short pockets and emerged with an old yo-yo, 3 bottle caps, a pack of sugar, a bottle of white-out, and her cell phone.

She threw the pack of sugar towards the window, and it pathetically plopped against it with the daintiest of sounds. She stared at it in mild disgust before reaching for the bottle caps. She threw each of them in a perfect arch and they clanged resolutely against the window, echoing lightly as they then fell along the sill. She waited. Nothing happened. She let out a sigh of frustration as she considered the yo-yo and the white-out. The strain of trying to determine which was more valuable to her took its toll and eventually she just chucked both of them simultaneously towards the window. They crashed loudly, and for a second, Sam thought that the window had cracked, but upon further inspection she realized that the white-out had opened up midair and a thin line of white paint was now splattered across the large glass pane.

She waited again, and again nothing happened. Now she was beyond frustrated and tinkering on the edge of seriously pissed off. She turned her cell phone over in her hands and considered what kind of damage the window would do to it and vice versa. After a moment, she shrugged and worked her arm back into her best pitching stance when suddenly the window flung open.

"Sam? What the hell."

Freddie climbed out onto the window sill, slightly damp and in a messier than usual ensemble. He aptly avoided the spilled white-out and picked up two of the bottle caps before he settled in the corner of the sill and looked over at Sam across from him in his chair.

"You couldn't just knock?"

Sam smirked. "Too tired – soooo many stairs."

Freddie rolled his eyes and flipped the bottle caps between his fingers.

They sat in silence, Sam still too tired to really put much of an effort into conversation. She began to comfortably doze off, blanketed within the warm May evening air, when Freddie loudly cleared his throat. She rolled her head over to face him and shot him a look with hooded eyes.

"What?" She asked, and as she took in his fidgeting she realized that he did not find the silence as comfortable as she had. She narrowed her eyes in brief consideration before he quickly interrupted her thoughts.

"So, what's up?" He drew out the so, as if to imply there were additional questions loaded into those three words that she should be aware of and answer.

Sam looked at him flatly. "The ninth floor."

Freddie narrowed his eyes. "Ha. Ha. I mean, why are you here?"

Her chin jutted out slightly. "Carly kicked me out. She is planning some romantic anniversary dinner for Peter, and apparently, having me there ruins the mood."

Freddie nodded. "Two years right?"

"Yup." She waved her hand as if to bat away any further discussion of Carly's love life. "And my mom is having this dude she's been seeing over for dinner tonight and I'm pretty sure her rambunctious teen daughter on the scene will not help seal the deal. He owns a hotdog stand so I _really_ want things to work out."

Freddie shook his head in disbelief but shot her a half smile. "So, I'm the lucky winner?"

She stretched out her arms above her head. "Yep. You get a fun filled evening of Sam Puckett because everyone else has deserted me to pursue their own selfish needs."

Freddie let out a short laugh and turned his face downward to examine the bottle caps in his hands. Neither of them spoke as the distant sounds of Seattle traffic filled the air around them. He looked everywhere but towards her, and she kept her eyes trained on him, trying to decipher the new, weird tension that seemed to always settle between them whenever they were alone together. When he finally looked up he seemed relatively surprised at her nonchalant examination of him, but he attempted to play it off by returning her smirk.

"You could have used the front door you know."

"No offense Fredward, but your mother is kind of the bane of my existence. Last time I was here she tried to cut my hair and rub some smelly cream all over me."

His lips quirked up slightly in a sly smile. "She's not here."

Sam stared at him in mild shock for a moment before looking meaningfully over at the eight flights of stairs leading back to the pavement. "Well, damn."

Freddie shifted his position slightly. "So actually, we can go inside if you want. I just got a new sound editing software on my laptop. It edits sound into units of nanoseconds."

She wrinkled her forehead and studied him for a long second before shaking her head slowly and scooting her chair forward so she could prop her feet up on the window sill beside him. "As stimulating as that sounds, it's actually kind of nice out here."

He played with the shoestrings on her ragged pair of sneakers and nodded in consent.

Sam looked down at the arm of her chair, some distant memory from years ago being tugged forward in her memory. "Do you leave this outside all the time?"

Freddie looked up and she gestured towards the chair so he would understand. He nodded and pursed his lips. "Yeah."

She smirked. "Didn't your mom teach you not to leave your valuables out where anyone can take them? I'm sure she has some lame rhyme and everything."

"Actually she does. _Keep things of value to you and me firmly under lock and key._" He lifted his eyebrows. "I guess my old camping chair doesn't qualify."

"I don't know Fredward. Someone could just climb right on up here and steal it."

He shot her a look. "You're going to steal it now aren't you?"

"Probably."

"You're such a delinquent."

"And you're such a dweeb."

"An odd couple." The words seemed to come automatically, and he flushed soon after he realized what he said and turned his eyes down awkwardly.

She looked at him quizzically for a split second, before gently nudging his thigh with the toe of her shoe, forcing him to look back up at her.

She smirked "Yeah, I guess on some level it works."

His face lit up briefly, before he cleared his throat and seemed to regain his cool demeanor. He rested his hand on her bare shin, and Sam resisted the urge to move her legs, to try and extinguish this weird, unstoppable change occurring between them.

"I can't believe it's already May. It feels like yesterday we just started our junior year."

She smiled brightly as she threw her arms up and yawned widely. "Yep. Only a few more weeks of school and then three full months of total senselessness."

"I'm pretty sure you're living a life of total senselessness now."

She shrugged. "I try, but school tends to get in the way. This summer it will be uninhibited senselessness Fredward."

He rolled his eyes and looked down at the bottle cap in his hand. "So --- what are your plans --- for this summer?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, I guess just the usual."

"You know Carly is spending a month at the University of Washington for that gifted students program."

Sam looked over her shoulder and became enthralled with a pigeon perched on the edge of the fire escape. "Yeah, she told me. They won't let her leave campus even though she lives in Seattle." She shrugged slightly. "Lame."

"So what are you going to do while she's gone?" Freddie seemed tentative, but he pushed on with the topic of conversation.

Sam stared at the pigeon for a while longer, and in her silence Freddie began to fidget.

She finally turned to him, and nonchalantly raised one shoulder. "Dunno, this seems good."

He looked back at her in confusion. "What? Hanging out on my fire escape?"

She nodded. "Beats hanging out with my cat."

Freddie clutched at her knee and shot her a toothy grin. "I should probably get another chair."

She narrowed one eye and returned his grin with her own lopsided smile. "You should probably get two. I don't think this one is going to be around much longer." She paused for a moment before adding with a point of her finger "and I expect to be fed."

He laughed and continued to hold her gaze, his smile reflected in every feature of his face. After a minute, she grew slightly uncomfortable and looked away. Her eyes became fixed on the pigeon again, and she watched it for some unknown span of time before Freddie finally interrupted the quiet.

"Well, we still have a month of school left. I have a load of finals to study for."

She ended her staring contest with the pigeon, declaring herself the winner, and scooted her chair forward another few inches in order to be able to drape her legs over Freddie's lap. "Sucks for you."

He seemed to ignore her as he wrapped his arms around her legs, trying a little too hard to seem casual in the movement. "And of course there's prom." He glanced up at her as he said it, some unreadable meaning tainting his expression and tone.

She smiled widely and nudged at his stomach with the toe of her sneaker. "That reminds me Freddork - Carly told me Jessica Ferguson asked you. I think that girl must be experiencing problems of the mental variety, because she is way too hot for a total nub like you." She smiled as she said it but Freddie looked down awkwardly.

"I haven't said yes."

Sam removed her legs and abandoned her stake on the chair to quickly and gracelessly plop down beside him on the wide ledge. She punched his leg. "Why not? You better not wait too long or she is going to remember to take her medication."

When he didn't reply, she nudged him over gently and rearranged herself so she leaned against the opposite wall from him and her legs were once again sprawled across his lap.

He again settled his arms over her bare calves. They sat in silence for a few moments, Sam desperately trying to understand the situation.

She crossed her arms over her chest. "What's the deal Fredward?" Her questioning tone expressed the extent of her confusion and frustration.

He looked up at her and wrinkled his nose as he bit the inside of his lip. "Carly told me you didn't have a date to the prom, and it wouldn't be the same if we weren't all three there, so I thought maybe you and I…" He trailed off and looked straight at her, his lips quirking up slightly at each side as he waggled his eyebrows playfully, trying to portray some casual confidence.

Sam smirked and reached forward to ruffle his hair. "Don't you worry your pretty little head about me. You can only ride the iCarly fame train so long and you'll never have the chance to go out with someone like Jessica Ferguson again – trust me." She shrugged. "Besides, Shane asked me yesterday after school."

Freddie's expression shifted to surprise. "Elevator shaft Shane?"

She let out a snort. "Yeah. I was shocked too, but his bones healed, and I guess some boys just can't get enough of little ole me." She half sang the last part of her statement and bobbed her shoulders up and down in her signature dance move, trying to keep things playful, but he just nodded slowly and didn't acknowledge her attempt at humor so she stopped and again concentrated on some fascinating invisible object in the distance.

"You seem to be dating a lot of different guys lately." She shot him a look and lifted her brow, almost daring him to continue. "Kevin, Cameron, Shane---" He trailed off, looking to her for some sort of reply.

"I can't believe you just included Kevin on that list."

He shrugged. "You went on a date with him." She shook her head and rolled her eyes but waited to see where he was going with this. "So---what's the deal?"

"Is it so weird for me to date?"

He shrugged again. "No---it's just lately it's been weirder than usual."

She examined him, seeking out all of the double meanings in his words before returning his shrug with one of her own. "I don't know. I have all these men in my life yet somehow I keep spending all my time with _you_." She meant it to be an insult, or at least she thought she meant it as an insult, but the brief change in his expression confirmed that Freddie was taking it as anything but. She looked down and mumbled "you nub" for good measure before turning back to the railing and silently wishing the pigeon would return for a rematch to provide her with a proper distraction.

After a few minutes of silence, Sam was undecided on whether or not they qualified as awkward or not, she lazily lifted her arms above her head and sighed. She gripped the ledge and leaned her head back against the brick. "I'm hungry."

Freddie looked up and smiled. "Shocker."

She kicked him lightly and then swung her legs over to the ground. She brushed off her shorts and stood up, turning to look down at him expectedly.

"Coming?"

"Where?"

"You're making me dinner." She cocked an eyebrow and shot him a challenging look.

He fixed his eyes on hers and finally shook his head slowly. "You're impossible."

"That's what my permanent record says." She reached down to offer him a hand and he graciously accepted it.

In true Sam fashion, she pulled him up roughly, hoping to startle him. He stumbled into her and gripped her waist to steady himself. She somehow found her hand clutching the front of his t-shirt.

He huffed and looked at her sarcastically. "Thanks."

She was too aware of how their noses were only an inch apart, and his hands were still wrapped around either side of her waist. They had been in similar precarious positions far too often over the past few months and she wasn't sure yet how she felt about it. It's Freddie - this should feel _weird _she reminded herself harshly.

She rested a cheek against her own shoulder as she half shrugged and looked up at him through her bangs in what she hoped was nonchalance. "Don't blame your clumsiness on me. I _tried_ to get you to take mother-son ballet classes."

"Right." He spoke sarcastically but his face was reflecting some other quality and his eyes remained locked with hers. The time to let go of each other and play off the incident had long past. She lifted her head and smirked as she automatically leaned in closer to him, letting her cheek briefly graze his as she spoke.

"Save me a dance at prom, dork?"

She moved her face back a few inches so she could see his eyes. He was flushed but he quickly nodded and she laughed. She squirmed out of his hold around her waist but kept her clutch on his t-shirt so she could drag him towards the window. "Come on. I'm in the mood for pork chops."

*

**A/N 2: So there you have it. I'm not exactly sure why, but I really love this chapter. I think because I can picture the entire thing in my head so clearly. Also, I think this chapter really solidifies how I picture their friendship in this story, if that makes sense. Please make sure to note that larger spans of time are lapsing between the chapters. The next chapter is over a month after this one, and it's a doozy - loaded with Seddie.**

Oh and **caalan** - Sam does fall back on purpose in Chapter 5. It is never intended to look like an accident. It is an insane and impulsive and definitely deliberate act to avoid the "Freddie situation" (as I imagine she calls it in her head), but when he pulls her back up, she is again face to face with the "Freddie situation", and well, you know what happens then...

and **SquishyCool -**the Spencer/hottub remark was _maybe _a minor poke at Spam shippers, but all in good fun. I'll read a good Spam fic with the best of them. The way it came up is I was thinking of things that came along with turning 18 and being a 'legal' adult, and I immediately thought "well, Sam could legally be with Spencer", then my brain went off on a tangent, imagining an absurd love triangle between Sam and Spencer and Freddie, and then I reigned myself in and condensed the entire imaginary flirtation to one line about seduction in a hottub full of pudding.

**Thanks again everyone! I look forward to reading your comments.**


	8. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: As much as I enjoy playing with his characters, iCarly is all Dan Schneider's

Chapter 7

June 15

"Remind me why we have to be the ones to drive to Spokane?" Sam rolled her window down and let the warm June air lift the ends of her hair.

"Because Spencer needs this thing for his sculpture."

"I know why Spokane, but the question was _why us_."

Freddie rolled his eyes and stole a glance at his passenger, who after two straight hours in the Volvo, had grown restless. Countless wrappers of various brands of junk food were scattered around her seat. She had listened to the newest Cuddlefish album twice, and covered her entire right arm in black ink doodles, as well as a portion of Freddie's right thigh before he finally convinced her that it was impossible to concentrate on driving while she was leaning over his lap and drawing on his leg. He bit down on the inside of his mouth as he recalled exactly how uncomfortable that had almost been. He shook off the memory and stole another glance at the blonde beside him. It only took a brief examination to know that extreme boredom had set in, and an extremely bored Sam was as delicate as a landmine.

Freddie chose his words wisely. "Spencer needed to work on his sculpture today. The buyer is coming tomorrow night."

Sam let out a heavy sigh coated in discontent but she did not challenge Freddie's reasoning.

"What about Carly?"

Freddie held back a discontented sigh of his own. He knew that Sam was already well aware as to why Carly had not accompanied them on this little adventure. In a few days their friend would be off to the University of Washinton until mid-July. "She had to finish packing – and she has her goodbye dinner with Peter tonight."

Sam sighed again and turned her attention to the window and the passing scenery coasting by at a steady 65 mph. She remained silent for several minutes. Finally she turned back to Freddie. "You think Carly and Peter will make it? I hear your freshman year of college is like a never-ending segment of _Girls Gone Wild__." _Though she spoke in sarcastic tones, Freddie could tell there was serious curiosity behind her inquiry

At first he was taken aback by the sudden turn in conversation, but he considered her question carefully.

"I don't know." He finally answered honestly. A quick glimpse at Sam from the corner of his eye told him that she was not satisfied with his reply.

She rolled her eyes. "Come on Fredward, I know you lay awake at night thinking about it."

Freddie's mouth and eyes shifted in confusion. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You can't tell me that the fact that in a few months Carly Shay might be single for the first time since freshman year hasn't weighed heavily on your dorky obsessed brain."

For the first time since they departed Seattle Freddie completely turned his attention from the road and directed it to the girl beside him. "Seriously Sam?"

"Yes, _seriously_ Benson. Don't forget that I was with you during the formative years of your life while you made Carly and Freddie photo montages and creepily plotted her first husband's fatal freak accident."

Freddie reigned in his growing anger. _Landmine_ he reminded himself. He was going to be in a small enclosed space with Sam for at least another two hours and he preferred to keep things as peaceful and amiable as possible. He took a deep breath.

"I was 13 Sam."

"Um 15 – and are you implying that you have matured since then? Because I have photo shopped wedding pictures and cheesy mixes that suggest otherwise." She was wearing her trademark smirk now and he felt the anger begin to slowly tighten in his chest. "Carly has a box with all the shit you gave her. She doesn't think I know about it. It's labeled _Never Gonna Happen._" She spoke lazily and with a condescending tone.

A flush was working its way up Freddie's neck and he bit the inside of his lip in order to prevent himself from lashing out. The car sped up to a careless 72 mph but all he could think about was how he needed to get out of this car and far away from the stupid, clueless blonde sitting next to him as soon as possible.

"I haven't given Carly anything like that in years." He spoke slowly and firmly.

Sam twirled her finger in the air. "_Since_ she started dating Peter, which nicely brings us right back to my original question."

He clenched his jaw. "Let's just drop it." He spoke through his teeth as he switched over to the left lane to pass a particularly slow minivan in front of him with a "Baby on Board".

She opened her mouth as if to object but seemed to finally notice the change in mood and driving patterns so instead she angrily turned back to the window and silently stewed.

Silence encompassed the interior of the station wagon for several miles. Sam's forehead was pressed against the passenger window and her face was completely shielded from Freddie by her long curtain of untamed hair. The prolonged silence was growing uncomfortable, and Freddie found himself hoping that Sam would fall asleep so he could be alone and able to fully immerse himself in his confused and jumbled thoughts. Each time he was convinced that this was indeed the case, she would make some subtle but undeniable movement that would confirm her position in the land of the conscious. She tucked her hair behind her ear. She skipped a song on the PearPod. She checked something on her phone. She let out a heavy breath loaded with some unknown meaning.

And after each movement Freddie would try and convince himself to speak, to break the awkward silence and tension with some witty anecdote or another. But each time he opened his mouth he closed it again without success. Whenever he was nauseous, the only thing he could think about was food, to his own dismay. He was in a similar situation now. The only things he could think to say were stories or statements loaded with Carly. He knew it would be like dribbling a basketball carelessly around the landmine, and each time opted instead for the uncomfortable but relatively safe silence.

The good news was they were making excellent time. Freddie had set the cruise control on the station wagon (against his mother's fervent commands) and they were coasting on the interstate at a comfortable pace 7 mph over the posted speed limit. Freddie thought for a moment about how pleased Carly would be with his uncanny new found ability to ignore the law of the road, and he opened his mouth to express this to Sam, before he quickly snapped it close again. He shook his head in mild disbelief. It was like hugging the toilet and imagining lasagna.

Just as they passed a sign announcing "Spokane: 47 miles", the traffic suddenly slowed drastically. Freddie attempted to peer up ahead to see what the hold up was, but all he saw in the distance were brake lights lined up one after another as he coasted to a stop.

From beside him, Sam looked up briefly from her current project, which involved making some sort of crown/tiara out of her fatcake and beef jerky wrappers, and mumbled some incomprehensible expletives before returning to her transfat glory.

Freddie removed one hand from the steering wheel and leaned it against the driver door. He bowed his head into his hand and pushed the hair off his forehead as he kept his foot firmly on the brake and stared straight ahead.

Within an instant the familiar tones of Tchaikovsky filled the car. Freddie looked over at his phone, as it vibrated slightly from the middle cup holder. He looked up at Sam.

"Can you get that?" The words seemed heavy after such an extended silence.

Sam scoffed and didn't look up from her half complete crown. "Last time I checked you had two working arms." It sounded like she mumbled "for now" under her breath but between the incessant ringing and the honking and shouting coming from the traffic he couldn't be sure.

"Come on Sam. I can't talk on the phone while I am driving."

Sam finally looked up and stared at him in disbelief. She gestured towards the numerous stopped cars surrounding them "We're in traffic, you nub. I don't think you are in any great danger if you talk on your cell phone while we sit idle here on the interstate." She huffed and continued to stare at him as the phone rang for a third time and Freddie began to panic that he was going to miss the call.

"I signed a contract with my mom!"

Sam laughed coldly and rolled her eyes but finally reached for the phone.

She looked pointedly at Freddie as she answered it. "Thank you for calling Dorkatopia, our emperor, Fredward, is unable to come to the phone because he is off searching for his balls."

Freddie winced but remained silent as he waited to see who was on the receiving end of Sam's humiliating efforts.

"Spencer? No, it's the Queen of Sheba, of course it's Sam." She propped her feet up on the wide dash and began curling a piece of her long blonde hair around her index finger distractedly. "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Nope." She looked at Freddie and smirked. "But I'll tell him to keep up the search, there's always hope I suppose." Freddie leaned back in his seat but refused to drop her smirking gaze. "I couldn't agree more, but you know our Fredward, always livin' on the edge." She dropped the piece of hair and arched an eyebrow and Freddie could hear a muffled Spencer rambling on about something or another. "Yeah, we're stopped now. Chickens? Seriously? How long?" Sam leaned back into her seat in defeat. "Damn the man. Yeah, that's fine I guess. Hold on." She looked over at Freddie and made the universal mime for a pen. He nodded and leaned over her propped legs, gently nudging them down with his hand as he pulled open the glove compartment and retrieved the small pad of paper with the attached pen that he kept there. She rolled her eyes as he handed them to her and she removed the pen with her teeth and flipped open the pad and began to scribble. Freddie's hand rested for a second longer on her thigh and he looked up at her from his precarious position but her attention was fully engrossed in writing down some unheard instructions coming from the phone.

After she finished writing, Sam let her head fall back into the headrest and Freddie quickly removed his hand and up righted himself into his own seat. "Yeah, I got it. What kind of convention?" Sam let out a half shudder, half laugh. "Well that explains the chickens. And ask for who?" She smirked and let out a half laugh as she scribbled some more before tossing the pad and the pen back into the glove compartment and slamming it shut. "Okay cool, thanks Spencer. Later." She clicked off the phone and tossed it back in the drink holder before returning to the folding and weaving of her crown without a word to Freddie.

Freddie stared at her with wide eyes. After several seconds of silence, he finally spoke up, his voice loaded with impatience. "So…?"

She looked up in minor frustration. "What?"

Freddie let out a huff and stared at her as if she was crazy. "What did Spencer say?"

"Oh. Well he hopes you find your balls. And he also wanted me to tell you that playing with your balls while you're driving is dangerous. They tend to bounce." Sam attempted to keep a straight face but after a few seconds she couldn't suppress her smile any longer. Freddie rolled his eyes and blushed but laughed with her, appreciative of the fact that it appeared the phone call had diluted the previous tension.

"Anything else?" He looked pointedly at the glove box.

"Oh yeah, a chicken truck flipped a couple miles ahead and apparently there are hundreds of chickens loose on I-90 so we are going to be here for awhile."

Freddie's face fell as he stretched his neck to look straight ahead as if able to confirm or deny this information visually. "But, the store closes at 5 - we'll never make it in time."

Sam looked down and played with the edge of a wrapper sticking off her crown. "Yeah. Spencer got us a hotel room. Apparently it was no easy feat considering there is a Future Farmers of America convention taking over Spokane for the weekend, but he managed to call in a favor from a friend of Socko's and got us a room at some swanky hotel in downtown Spokane." Sam shrugged her shoulders as she reached into the glove box. "The Davenport?" She read off the pad, looking at Freddie quizzically.

Freddie shrugged his shoulders in response.

"Well, apparently we are supposed to find Jim." Sam looked towards Freddie with a knowing look. "He works in the hotel gym."

Freddie laughed as the traffic crept a foot forward. "Of course."

"And we are not officially checking into the room, just keeping it warm over night."

Freddie groaned, but the playful and nervous look in his eyes remained trained on Sam as he considered the implications, and opportunities, that lie await in the night ahead of them.

* * *

They ended up in traffic for over three hours. Five o'clock came and went. Eventually Freddie felt obliged to turn the car off considering they were burning fuel and not traveling anywhere. Sam whined briefly as the leather interior quickly grew hot beneath the high afternoon sun, but for the most part she remained in high spirits. To pass the time they played "What am I thinking." Sam pulled Freddie's camera out from his backpack in the backseat and propped it on the dash. "For iCarly" she explained. She put on quite the show but eventually Freddie refused to play any longer after Sam guessed all of his things within 5 questions (pistachio, loofah, and a wallaby) and he was unable to guess any of hers within the allotted 20 (porcupine, door hinge, and the letter K).

Around hour two Sam again became restless and in one fail swoop she grabbed the camera and hurdled herself out of the car. Freddie stared at her empty seat for several seconds before frantically looking up and searching for her along the jammed interstate. When he caught sight of her long blonde hair weaving through the traffic he saw that she was pulling people out of various cars and recording them. People were showing off double joints, crazy scars, and breaking out their favorite dance moves. A couple in their mid-twenties started to salsa along the dashed white lines of the highway, twin brothers from Omaha began to break dance on top of their minivan, and some dreadlocked hippies from Portland started playing music on an old acoustic guitar and some bongo drums. Freddie laughed appreciatively at the mayhem that was currently happening on I-90.

He decided to seize the opportunity of being alone to call his mom and explain the situation. After several minutes of reassurances and promises, he hung up. His mom had expressed her concern about driving at night, hotel food, and the bird flu ("chickens?! Did you say chickens?!"), but not once had she seemed concerned about the idea that her 17 year old son was going to be sharing a hotel room with his female best friend. Freddie felt this probably spoke psychological volumes about his relationship with his mom and/or his relationship with Sam, but he was too tired to try and interpret further meanings.

He looked back out on the interstate and re-evaluated the growing scene around him. He watched an old man belly dance and an Asian girl do a series of flips and handsprings before he turned back to seek out the instigator of it all. He finally found her sitting on the tailgate of the hippies' truck drumming wildly on one side of the bongos while the former guitarist trained the video camera on both her and the dreadlocked drummer. She must have felt his gaze because after a few seconds she turned towards him. She waved her arms in the air around her as if to say "look what I created!" and Freddie nodded in response, unable to control his smile.

* * *

The sun had already set and twilight had settled over the state of Washington when traffic finally began to move forward at a slow but steady pace. Sam's seat was pushed back as far as it would allow, despite Freddie's safety precautions, and she was snoring softly. Freddie followed his PearPhone's point to point directions and was immersed in downtown Spokane before Sam finally stirred beside him. She sat up, let out a bear of a yawn, cracked her neck, and returned her seat to its upright position.

Neither of them spoke, letting the exhaustion and excitement of the day settle between them in a comfortable silence. Sam took in the sights out the window and Freddie tried to figure out exactly how to navigate through the one way streets and dead ends to find the hotel.

Suddenly, Sam shouted out in excitement and grabbed Freddie's arm. "JumboMart! Pull over!"

He jumped and then took a long breath to settle his nerves. "Sam, car rule #53 clearly states 'do not make any sudden movements or exclamations that may startle the driver' this includes screaming at me and grabbing me."

She rolled her eyes. "Just pull over dork."

Freddie automatically obeyed and pulled over into the JumboMart parking lot, which consumed an entire block of downtown, and found a space.

They made their way to the lit up store entrance and Sam grabbed his arm as she galloped beside him. "You have 53 car rules?" she asked incredulously.

He shot her a look. "129 actually. I gave you a copy."

"Oh yeah. I don't read anything in binder form." She dropped Freddie's arm to enter the store without giving him a chance to respond.

He pushed down his sudden disappointment at the lack of contact and followed her in.

"Why are we here?" He finally asked.

Sam ignored his question and instead grabbed a cart and shot off towards the racks of clothing in the middle of the store. She looked over her shoulder at him. "Go get the necessary toiletries. I'll meet you in the snacks." And with that she was gone.

Freddie debated for several minutes over what toiletries would be necessary for a girl for a single night stay. Finally he had filled his arms with 2 toothbrushes, a jumbo tube of toothpaste, extra-strength gingivitis fighting mouthwash, dental floss, 2 types of deodorants, a pink bottle of shave gel, a pack of pink razors, shampoo and conditioner, hair gel, body wash, Q-tips, face wash, body lotion, jumbo cotton balls, face lotion, bubble bath, nail polish and nail polish remover, three loofahs of varying colors and sizes, hair barrettes with tiny flowers on the them, and tweezers.

He carefully made his way over to the food aisles, shuffling slowly and balancing all of the items with his chin. When he finally found Sam, he made his way over to the cart and gratefully unloaded his arms. Sam turned towards him as she tossed two bags of chips on top of their growing pile of merchandise.

"What size boxers do you wear?"

Freddie spluttered and immediately flushed crimson.

Sam's mouth quirked up into a lopsided grin at his embarrassment and she dug through the cart to grab a multi-pack of white v-neck shirts and a multi-pack of dark blue boxers. "I got medium and there are three to a pack. I figure that way we can both wear them tonight to sleep in." She tossed them back in the cart and began inspecting the multitude of items Freddie had just deposited.

Freddie composed himself and cleared his throat. "I wear a large." His voice was scratchy and slightly deeper than usual and he folded his arms over his chest in an attempt to better assert his manliness.

Sam looked up at him and cocked an eyebrow skeptically. She stared him down for a few seconds and he finally acquiesced. "Medium's fine." His arms fell back to his side and he turned towards the snacks aisle to decide what he should contribute to the growing pile of sugar and fat in the cart.

"Freddie, can't you go one night without exfoliating?" Freddie turned around in confusion. Sam stood by the cart and was holding up the tweezers, bubble bath, and nail polish. "And what exactly are we going to do with tweezers and bubble bath?" She smirked as the red tones already covering his face deepened. "And am I suppose to paint my nails for it?"

"I didn't know what you needed." He attempted to explain.

She shook her head and removed the majority of the toiletries he selected from the cart. "It's like you don't know me at all."

* * *

When they finally pulled up to the hotel, the bellhops and doormen stared at the beat up Volvo with undisguised disgust and dismay. Freddie and Sam probably did not help the situation when they climbed out of the car loaded down with JumboMart bags, Sam sporting a tiara made up of beef jerky and fatcake wrappers. When they finally made it up to the room, after an awkward CIAesque mission with Jim from the gym that involved 2 elevator rides and 14 flights of stairs, Sam dropped everything and collapsed on the bed.

"I want a shower and bed." She mumbled through the layers of crisp white cotton and down feathers.

Freddie placed his load of bags on the small table by the door and surveyed the room. He bit his lip and glanced over at an oblivious Sam when he realized that the large king bed was the only viable sleeping place. There was some type of leopard print lounge chair in the corner, though it appeared it was constructed more for style than comfort. He shuffled awkwardly from foot to foot before he made his way over to the bed and gently sat down next to the collapsed blonde.

"Do you want to shower first?" he asked, beginning to reach down to place his hand on her back but not able to fully complete the unfamiliar action. Instead he let his hand hover above her for a moment before clenching it and returning it to his side, grateful her face was deep within the feather bedding.

Sam groaned in reply and mumbled "duh".

Freddie got up and began to empty their bags. He extracted the packs of boxers and t-shirts as well as the shampoo, conditioner, body wash, shave gel, and razors. He went into the bathroom and began to meticulously set everything up in a beleaguered attempt to settle his nerves. He folded a pair of boxers and a t-shirt on top of the vanity, he hung two towels on the low bar outside the shower door, and he placed the necessary toiletries on the shelves in the large standing shower and mentally tried to determine what order would be most suitable. He rearranged them all multiple times, before he finally turned around. He let out a tiny gasp, which he hoped sounded less wussy than it felt, when he saw Sam, leaning in amusement against the door frame, a toothbrush hanging out of her mouth.

She smirked and moved back out to the sinks outside the door to finish brushing.

Freddie approached her tentatively. "Everything's set up."

She shot him a wry smile and looked at him through the mirror as she rinsed the toothbrush off and shook out her long hair.

"Yeah I saw. We really need to work on your weird and dorky tendencies." She shot him another unreadable smile as she moved towards the bathroom and shut the door behind her. Freddie went to work on his own dental hygiene, brushing twice, flossing, and rinsing with mouthwash. When he was done, he perched himself on the sink and waited for Sam to get out of the shower.

He heard the water shut off and he waited a moment. "Sam."

"Yeah." Her voice was muffled through the steam and door.

"Do you think we will be able to get extra blankets and pillows from the front desk – I mean, considering we are not supposed to be here?" Freddie bit his lip and gathered his nerve when she didn't reply. "Because, you know, I'll sleep on the floor so you can have the bed."

Again, no response from the bathroom. Freddie decided that she probably couldn't hear him when the door suddenly flung open and there stood a scowling and damp Sam. She was toweling her hair off and the white v-neck t-shirt was clinging to her wet curves and the boxers were rolled over and sat low on her hips and oh geez, he needed to look away.

"Are you gonna be a total nub about this?" She finished toweling off her hair and gathered it on top of her head securing it with the hair tie off her wrist.

Freddie gathered his senses and forced himself to look back at Sam. "No…I just didn't know--"

She cut him off. "I don't care about sharing a king size bed Fredster, but if you are worried about your virtue…"

"I don't mind either!" His voice was a bit too excitable to be cool and he shifted his eyes away from her in embarrassment. "I should shower." He mumbled as he hopped off the sink and made his way into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind him.

Sam was sitting Indian style on the bed when Freddie finally emerged from the bathroom. She held the remote in one hand and a pack of fatcakes in the other. Her eyes scanned Freddie's ensemble critically before she looked down at her own matching sleepwear.

"If you ever tell anyone that we wore matching pajamas, I will make it my life's mission to find new cruel and unusual ways to cause you pain."

Freddie laughed awkwardly and pushed at his still damp and messy hair. Sam had turned her attention back to the television and was flipping through the channels between bites of fatcake. With a final bite, she clicked the television off and turned back towards Freddie who had not moved an inch.

"Nothing's on. I'm going to bed." She tossed the remote towards him and he stood motionless as it fell noisily on the floor beside him.

Sam looked at him, her face set in some unreadable expression. "You're being weird." She cocked her head. "Weirder than usual - which I didn't think was possible, but you have exceeded my expectations." She spoke slowly, and the insult was laced with curiosity. Freddie urged his legs to work. Urged his mouth to work. He should really say something witty, something normal, insult her, convince her that nothing was weird about this, he could be just as nonchalant as her, he didn't have butterflies in his stomach, he didn't suddenly feel like he was going to vomit.

"Lasagna." He blurted out before snapping his mouth shut in horror.

Sam narrowed her eyes. Her face morphed instantly from bewilderment to confusion to anger to amusement and finally back to the infuriating nonchalant expression she had been wearing since they entered the room. She let out a short laugh and shook her head in a show of exasperation, flicked off the lamp, and turned her back to Freddie who was mentally berating himself for his own stupidity. "Too easy" she muttered as she settled herself into the layers.

After several minutes frozen in the same spot, Freddie was finally able to urge his legs into action. He walked around to the other side of the large bed and stopped at the edge of it. It appeared Sam had fallen asleep in the few minutes it had taken him to spring into action. He let out a heavy sigh and switched off the second lamp to emerge the room in total darkness. His feet remained planted in the lush carpet and he began to shuffle the pillows around awkwardly. He moved to climb in a few times, but never made it past the initial intention before returning to his original position. He settled his stare on Sam's sleeping form.

He blamed her for this. Freddie considered himself a pretty astute guy. He had grown up surrounded by females, and was generally pretty good at figuring out the necessary cross-gender translations. But _she_ was not like other girls, and just when Freddie figured out one part, she threw another curve ball at him. Maybe he really was just imagining the tension, the…potential. Otherwise, how could she spend a night in a hotel room with just him and act like it was just any other night-

"Ooof!"

Freddie's frantic thoughts as he stared aimlessly at Sam's form were abruptly interrupted when a not too soft, not too hard pillow came crashing against his jaw.

"Sam!" He rubbed his jaw gently, glaring at the lump beneath the covers who had flipped over to face away from him.

"Stop just standing there and staring…you're wigging me out." Her words were muffled by cotton and sleep.

Freddie let out a petulant sigh and climbed into the bed beside her, slightly comforted by the fact that a few feet still separated them. He stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, waiting for Sam's breathing to become rhythmic and steady so he could ease his own panic. When her breathing finally settled, he flipped onto his side and stared at her back. Her waist curved perfectly into her hips and a narrow band of skin was visible between the bottom of her t-shirt and the top of her boxers. Freddie smiled as he considered how both of them wore the exact same clothes, but filled them out so differently. The thick duvet was bunched around her waist and her arms were seemingly curled in front of her. He thought for a moment how innocent her sleeping form looked – so much less intimidating than the conscious, upright version.

Suddenly her weight shifted slightly and Freddie held his breath as she scooted over closer to him, clearing away the inches between them until her body was flush against his. She let out a small content sigh and gently nudged her own smooth leg between his. He was motionless, afraid the slightest movement would startle her to her senses. He lightly removed his arm from behind her back and rested it across her waist, still supporting the weight of it on his own. Sam let out a slight grunt and reached for his hand with her own, forcing his arm to settle comfortably over her waist. She intertwined her fingers with his and began to drum her fingers lightly across his knuckles. He was suddenly struck with the knowledge that these were not the actions of the unconscious.

Now he was really nervous, and nauseous again. Images of throwing up all over Sam's head flashed through his mind and he wondered exactly how she would extract her revenge for that type of behavior. He gulped back his nerves and bit his lip as he tried to figure out what to do with his other arm, which was quickly loosing all feeling in its tight spot between his chest and Sam's back. He gently unwedged it, and tried to find a natural spot for it to rest, but somehow ended up palming the back of Sam's head awkwardly.

She let out a heavy sigh, released his hand and quickly flipped over to face him. Their faces were inches apart, and her eyes were trained on his face, slowly examining his features in that bored but penetrating way she had about her. Freddie stared wide eyed and Sam's eyes rolled as her mouth smirked upwards.

"Can you try to tone down the dorky?" Her voice was soft but still held her trademark mocking tones.

Freddie gulped and slowly nodded. Sam's lopsided smile grew slightly. Freddie expected her to turn over so they could resume their previous position and he was desperately trying to figure out what to do with that damn extra arm when she surprised him by nuzzling her face into his neck and shoulder and curling her body up next to him. He could smell the shampoo they both used as her damp curls lay haphazardly all around him. He took a deep breath and repeated her earlier move by nudging her legs apart so that he could entangle his own with hers. He then lay his arm across her waist and pulled her closer into him. A soft happy purr came from her throat as she burrowed her face a little deeper. Within a few minutes, her breath was steady and even, and it appeared that for all intents and purposes, Sam Puckett had fallen asleep, totally wrapped up in Freddie Benson.

Freddie let out a deep sigh into the blonde hair as he too began to drift off. Maybe some curveballs weren't so bad.

*

**A/N: So, I have received a few reviews expressing confusion over Sam's behavior in previous chapters. I debated whether or not to respond, because I want people to draw their own conclusions, but I feel I have to say Sam is not meant to be portrayed as clueless or idiotic or unaware or uncaring. She is aware of the growing "Freddie situation" to an extent, but I imagine her feelings about it are a mixture of confusion and denial with a dash of insecurity, but you know, in a cool 'Sam' way. **

**Also, I know it seems drawn out, and I will admit that the fic was never meant to be 10 chapters. When I started writing this, my thinking was "what if Sam and Freddie kept having these tense/flirtatious moments, but neither of them were able to bite the bullet and admit their feelings, so they just continue on in this weird limbo?" I was thinking of 5-6 chapters, each covering a different moment. Clearly, things got a little out of control, but I'm still trying to work out the perfect fanfic formula. I don't know if that makes anything clearer, but you know...hopefully. **

**Anyways, on a completely different note, I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! The next three chapters are all slightly connected, and work together to wrap things up, so I feel like we are coming down the home stretch. Also, some of the details from the prologue will make a lot more sense after the next chapter. I truly appreciate and love all of the reviews and critiques, so let me know what you thought of Sam and Freddie's road trip!**


	9. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I can't claim any ownership of iCarly

Chapter 8

July 19

Carly burst through the apartment door, excitement emulated in her every move and expression. "Spencer!" She yelled loudly, frantically almost, as she tossed her oversized duffle bag onto the patterned couch and ran over to the bottom of the stairs.

"SPENCER!"

Suddenly, her older brother tumbled down the stairs, waving his arms wildly and looking around in alarm.

"What?! Is something on fire? I told Gibby not to microwave the Chinese cartons!"

Carly waited patiently for her brother to settle his gaze on her.

"Carly! You're back!" He jumped off the steps towards her and gathered her up in his arms, squeezing her as he lifted her off the ground.

After several seconds she dropped her arms and wheezed as he continued to grip her. "Can't---breathe."

Spencer dropped her back to the ground but kept his hands on her shoulders.

"Look at you. Last time I saw you, you were only this big." He dropped one hand to indicate a height about 4 feet off the floor and a good 18 inches below where Carly currently stood.

She rolled her eyes. "Spencer, I wasn't even gone a full month."

"It felt like foooorrrevvverrr." He exaggerated his movements and his features.

She smiled. "I missed you too."

He grabbed her arm and pulled her over to the kitchen. "I should make something to celebrate! I know!" He dropped her arm and clapped his hands together in boyish delight. "Pina Coladas!" He pursed his lips and considered a moment, mentally pulling a recipe from the vast vault that was his mind. "Minus the rum" he added as an afterthought.

"Also known as pineapple-coconut smoothies."

He considered her reasoning. "No. I am sure there is a distinction."

She laughed and settled herself on the stool. "Where's Sam? I figured she would be here."

"We didn't think you were going to get home until later. She is probably over at the Bensons."

Carly cocked her head in questioning. "Freddie's? What is she doing at Freddie's?"

Spencer shrugged his shoulders as he randomly assembled various ingredients on the counter and Carly frowned slightly when a kumquat was added to the pile. "She's over there a lot. I haven't really seen her since you've been gone. But I was in the parking lot last week and got hit by a balloon filled with chocolate pudding so I'm pretty sure she's around."

Carly pursed her lips and nodded before gesturing to the growing pile of ingredients. "Spencer, there are no kumquats in Pina Coladas."

Spencer jerked his head up and down in childish frustration. "I know! But I bought this at the market last week and if I don't use it soon it's going to go bad."

"And why did you buy a kumquat?"

"Because it's just so fun to say! _Kum-quat_. The seller was like 'G'day sir, would you like to buy this here kumquat?' and you try to say no to a British man in Seattle selling kumquats! It's impossible!"

Carly rolled her eyes. "You're a loon." She watched as Spencer threw the ingredients into the blender and wondered lightly about why her rambunctious best friend would be spending her cherished summer days at the Bensons.

Suddenly she jumped off the stool and headed towards the door. "I'm going to go find Sam. I need to talk to her about something that happened while I was at UW."

Spencer spluttered as she hurried through the door. "What about Kumquat Coladas?"

Carly waved in apology but shut the door behind her and hurriedly knocked on the door located directly across the hall. She shuffled her feet impatiently as she waited for a reply. After a few minutes, she swallowed back her frustration and knocked louder. Maybe they weren't there? Or maybe they were, but they didn't want to come to the door? She quickly pushed back the uncomfortable thought and pulled out her cell phone and dialed Sam's familiar number.

It rang four times before finally a surprising voice answered. "Carly?"

"Freddie?" Carly glanced down to confirm that she had indeed dialed the right number.

"Yeah – Sam's napping."

"Where are you?"

There was a brief pause and Freddie cleared his throat. "At my apartment."

Carly hesitated in her confusion. Sam was napping in Freddie's apartment?

"Oh. Ummm okay – well I am outside your apartment door. Can you come let me in?"

Freddie let out his breath and his voice seemed to brighten significantly. "Yeah. I'll be right there."

Suddenly the apartment door flung open, abruptly interrupting Carly's thoughts, and Freddie stood there with an enormous smile spread across his face.

"Welcome back!"

Carly pushed away her concern and lunged forward to hug her friend. "It's so good to see you!"

Freddie laughed into her hair. "You too! Come on, Sam is going to freak out." He pulled her back to his bedroom. His laptop was laying haphazardly across his bed and a text document was flashing on the screen. "I was in the middle of finishing early action applications." He explained.

Carly nodded and looked around the room before turning to Freddie in confusion. "Where's Sam?"

Freddie smiled and nodded towards the large open window barely visible in the hallway. "On the fire escape. Go on out, I am going to finish up this last app real quick."

Carly smiled and made her way over to the window.

There was Sam, sprawled out on some kind of deluxe camping chair. Her bare feet were propped up on a large upholstered ottoman that sat between her chair and an identical one beside it. A small fan was clipped to the window sill, and the cool blast was fluttering her blonde curls gently back, her eyelids were closed and her cheek was pressed hard against the fabric of the seat. Carly surveyed the rest of the set-up. In addition to the camping chairs and ottoman there was a PearPod propped into large speakers perched on the steps, in the center of the landing sat an inflatable pool filled with clear water, various toys, and other pool paraphernalia, and to top it all off a mini fridge/freezer combo was resting against the window sill, a long orange extension cord connecting it to the depths of the apartment. Carly laughed gently before nudging her friend awake.

"Mmmmmm." Sam mumbled sleepily and batted Carly's hand away.

"Sam." She spoke softly and nudged her again. When the blonde still didn't budge, Carly let out a heavy sigh and crossed her arms across her chest. "Sam!"

Sam jerked up in her seat. "Ehhhhh." She whined as she pushed back her hair. She finally looked up at Carly and her face lit up in surprise and delight.

"Carls!" She leapt to her feet and gathered her friend in a bear of a hug, lightly lifting her off her feet. "Good to see you kid! I thought you weren't going to be back until later."

Carly laughed and Sam released her. "I couldn't wait so I grabbed an early cab and here I am!"

Sam's smile was wide and bright as she nodded her head. "Good thinkin' Shay. We were all going through some major withdrawal. I was getting the shakes." They smiled at each other a moment longer. "Well, have a seat dude, tell me all about it." Sam settled herself back into her camping chair and indicated broadly to the one beside her.

Carly hesitantly settled herself on the edge of the unfamiliar seat before she slowly leaned back, her face quirking in pleasant surprise. "Hmmm. Not too shabby." She propped her feet on the ottoman next to Sam's dirty toes.

"I know- right." Sam proudly spread her arms out. "Welcome to my hangout."

Freddie's muffled voice shouted from inside. "_Our_ hangout Sam!" He emphasized the 'our' and Carly was suddenly seized by a weird feeling.

Sam smirked in response and leaned over to her conspiratorially. "He provides refreshments, so I allow him his delusions."

Carly let out an uncomfortable chuckle and avoided the other girls gaze, instead settling on a slow perusal of the complete setup from her new viewpoint. The upholstered ottoman appeared to have a separated top, and along the window sill there were wood panels which extended out to make table tops for each chair. The makeshift table seemingly designated for Sam's chair was cluttered with two root beer bottles, a couple of unused balloons, multiple sticky popsicle sticks, random playing cards, and a paper airplane. The table designated for Carly's seat had a few condensation rings, but was otherwise empty.

The quiet grew briefly uncomfortable before Sam chimed in. "Want something to drink?" she reached behind her and opened up the small fridge. "We have sodas, water, juice-" she shut the fridge and opened up the small freezer "and popsicles."

Carly nodded. "Got peppy-cola?"

Sam smiled and again opened the fridge. "You know it." She tossed Carly a chilled can of her favorite beverage before she turned her body back around and rummaged through the tiny shelves. After a brief search, she emerged with a small pack of carrots with a tiny cup of ranch dressing attached. She nonchalantly peeled back the plastic, dipped a thick short carrot into the creamy dressing and popped it into her mouth.

Carly gaped at her, her peppy cola frozen in the air by her lips.

"What?" Sam mumbled through crunchy bites "you want one?"

Carly's eyes grew wider. "You're eating –_vegetables_?" The last word came out as more of a gasp.

Sam rolled her eyes and shrugged off Carly's shock. "Yeah. The dork hides all of the good snacks and won't let me have them until I have at least one serving of vegetables a day."

Freddie's voice again came from inside, proving that even though he may not be visible, he was still present in the conversation. "You're 18 and you have high cholesterol!"

Sam scoffed. "Says you" she yelled back through the window before turning back to Carly. "I made the mistake of letting him run a bunch of tests on me a few weeks ago using his mom's monster of a first aid kit."

Carly's lips twitched up and she looked at her friend in amusement. Thought it was all very weird, she couldn't resist the joke. "So you two have been playing doctor?"

Sam kept a straight face but tossed a carrot at Carly's head. Freddie's laughter carried clearly from inside.

Sam finally smiled despite herself. "Yeah, yeah." She didn't address Freddie or Carly specifically and instead concentrated on selecting her next carrot. Finally she looked back up at Carly. "So how was it? Did you learn tons of pointless nonsense that you can brag about on your college applications?" She grinned and bit noisily into a carrot.

Carly flushed excitedly and grabbed Sam's arm suddenly. "I almost forgot! I have big news!"

Sam's flat expression morphed into one of shared excitement and curiosity. "So" she started impatiently "spill it!"

Carly grinned and leaned slightly towards her best friend. "When I was at UW the Dean of Admissions asked to meet with me. And apparently he is a big fan of iCarly – I mean he asked for my autograph and everything."

Sam laughed. "Heh, I love it when old people get all pumped up about our show."

"Yeah – well this old guy was definitely pumped. He wants me to come to UW and continue iCarly throughout college. And he is offering me a full scholarship!"

Sam smiled brightly and excitedly hopped in her seat. "Carly! That's awesome! You would still be here in Seattle!"

"I know! And that's not even the best part. He wants you to come too! They are prepared to offer you early acceptance and a full scholarship also!" Carly bounced up and down as she delivered the news and Sam fell back into her seat in shock.

She considered for a long moment before pointing a finger to Carly in suspicion. "They've seen my grades?"

"Yes! And from what they were saying, they aren't as bad as you make them out to be. They insinuated that you had decent scores all throughout junior year, and apparently your SATs were in the top 10 percentile."

Sam still looked suspicious. "Have they seen my discipline record?"

Carly sighed. "Yes. And he said he could tell you were 'a high-spirited young lady', but he has faith that by college you will have 'matured past all the shenanigans'." She changed her voice and used the requisite finger quotes at the necessary parts to mimic the dean.

Sam scoffed and Freddie contributed from inside once more. "Fat chance!" Sam carefully aimed a ranch covered carrot through the window and Freddie yelped slightly. She turned back to Carly and smirked. "So this is really happening? I might actually go to college?"

Carly felt relief and excitement that her friend seemed to be finally getting it. "Yes! With me!"

They both sprung out of their chairs simultaneously and gripped each other in hugs. They jumped up and down shrieking in excitement. Carly began to quickly rush out all of the plans she had been considering since the dean told her the news a few days ago. "They want us to host a special show on the campus station too, which will be awesome experience for my resume. We can room together freshman year, and then maybe we can get a little apartment off campus – or maybe we can just stay here with Spencer, I mean our studio is here and we have the spare bedroom and its not like he's going to try and impose strict rules or anything."

Sam just nodded stupidly and Carly laughed. "It's not for another year but I have to admit I was dreading going off on my own! And this way we will be together! And if Peter and I stay together he will only be a couple hours away." Carly collapsed back down in her seat, exhausted by the sheer joy of it all. "It's perfect."

Sam followed her lead and collapsed down beside her. "It is."

Suddenly Freddie crawled out of the window, juggling three pints of ice cream and three spoons.

He made his way over to the steps and sat down, smiling widely at the girls. "I heard the news, and I figured it calls for a celebration. Ben and Jerry here agree." He tossed a pint of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough at Carly who yelped in excitement as he playfully hurled the container of Cherry Garcia at Sam who caught it in one hand and shot him a knowing smile. He kept a pint of Mint Chocolate Cookie nestled between his knees. He passed out the spoons and smiled as he peeled off his lid.

Carly and Sam did the same, and Sam began to eagerly dig her spoon into her treat, her carrots abandoned now on the crowded table, before Carly hollered out. "Wait!"

Sam whinnied but didn't move her full spoon to her lips.

"This calls for a toast." Freddie and Sam continued to look at her expectantly. "To iCarly – and to friendship – and to our future, whatever it may hold." She smiled brightly and Sam rolled her eyes ever so slightly but lifted her spoon in the air and gave a "here-here" in agreement. Freddie and Carly both lifted their own spoons as well and as the three flavors connected, Carly couldn't help but notice that Sam and Freddie were sharing some look she couldn't begin to understand.

They all sat in comfortable silence for quite some time, enjoying their ice cream in the dense summer heat. Freddie had settled on the stair closest to Sam, and she would frequently lean over to dig her own spoon into his carton.

Freddie finally broke the sugar induced trance. "I can't believe you are both going to be at UW next year." He pointed to Carly with his spoon. "I thought for sure that you would go to an Ivy."

Sam looked over at her in mild curiosity. Carly had never talked about her college plans with Sam, knowing that she and the blonde were never really on the same page when it came to their academic futures. Carly shrugged. "I thought about it, but they are all really expensive, and really far away, and when it comes down to it, iCarly is what makes me happy – not calculus or physics or economics."

"Amen." Sam leaned over and dug a piece of cookie dough out of Carly's pint.

Carly suddenly felt stupid and inconsiderate as she looked over at Freddie. "Freddie – of course they want to offer you the same deal as well. I just didn't think that much about it because I know you have been set on Berkeley since – well, forever."

Freddie's smile widened slightly, and he turned to examine his ice cream to hide the sudden inexplicable flush on his face. Carly watched in amazement as he glanced up at Sam, who was smirking at him with her spoon hanging from her mouth. "Yeah well, plans change" he said softly and Carly jerked her head back in surprise.

Before she had time to work out her reply, Freddie nudged Sam and pointed to his watch. "It's almost three o'clock."

Sam moaned but removed her feet from the ottoman and stretched out her arms as she leaned up in her chair. "Yeah, yeah – I know."

Carly looked between them in confusion. Freddie looked over at her to explain.

"Sam got a summer job." He smirked.

Carly gaped and looked over to Sam for confirmation, but she was looking lazily around her chair for the missing lid to her ice cream.

"What? You're working?" Carly couldn't disguise the total disbelief in her voice.

Sam shrugged. "Only because I found a job that pays me a ton of money to sit on my butt – _and_ I'm allowed to eat whenever I want, _and _I can get online, _and_ I can watch TV, _and_ on Tuesdays and Thursdays I can work on my killer tan." She did a little dance as she continued to scout the area around her chair for the lid.

Carly's mouth quickly snapped shut as she tried to figure out what it was that Sam was talking about. Sam seemed to notice and leaned towards her. "It's for the children" she mock whispered.

Freddie rolled his eyes from his perch. "She babysits for the Morgan's in 3B."

Sam nodded as she abandoned her search for the lid and opted instead to plop the open ice cream beside Freddie. "Well people, I'm out. Fredward, keep my seat warm for me." She began to climb through the window before in a split second decision she turned around, pushed Carly's feet off the ottoman, lifted up the top and extracted 2 bags of chips and a pack of snack cakes. "Later" she said flatly as she moved back through the window and disappeared into the cool apartment.

Freddie was staring wide eyed at the ottoman that Sam had just raided and Carly laughed.

She looked over at Freddie reassuringly. "Well at least she still ate the vegetables."

He nodded silently but it seemed his mind was elsewhere. Carly's mind returned once again to the elaborate setup surrounding her. She couldn't shake the feeling that the whole thing was just _weird_.

For the first time since she had come out on the porch she noticed that Sam's chair was painted in multiple different bright colors.

She broke the brief silence when she looked over at Freddie and cocked an eyebrow. "Sam's chair?" She asked, reading the bold sprawling print across the back.

Freddie glanced at the chair and then looked at Carly. "Yeah. I still don't know when she did it – but you know Sam, she tends to get a bit-" he searched for the right word "possessive."

"Yeah." Carly licked her spoon as Freddie moved over to Sam's recently vacated seat. He opened up the fridge, presumably to grab something to drink, and pulled out the missing lid to Sam's Cherry Garcia.

Carly watched as he shook his head, a smirk playing at the edges of his mouth. He covered the now melting pint, and placed it in the freezer before settling back into the chair.

Carly turned her body slightly to face him. "So are you really considering UW?"

Freddie lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. "Yeah. I mean, it would be weird to leave you guys. Plus--" he looked over at her and smirked "who would press all those crazy buttons that make iCarly work?"

"We would manage – not that I don't want you to stay, it's just, you have been dreaming about Berkley since I've known you."

Freddie stared down at his knees. "I know – I always looked at Berkley as a place where I could reinvent myself, leave dorky AV Freddie with the over-protective mother in Seattle and become cool, rocker Fred, who rides a motorcycle and just happens to know a lot about computers." He looked up at her with a lopsided smile and she rolled her eyes as he continued. "But now, I don't know, it just doesn't seem necessary. I would rather be with you--- and Sam."

Carly nodded slowly. "Speaking of Sam," she looked over at him tentatively. "What is all this?" Her arm waved out in a large arc to indicate the comfortable abode created around them.

He shrugged. "It's no big deal. We just wanted a place to hang while you were gone."

Carly looked at him long and hard before her exasperation finally got the better of her. "Okay! What is going on with you two?"

Freddie glanced up, startled slightly. "Nothing!"

If Carly wasn't sure there was something going on before, that one word sealed the deal. "Really?" The word was laced with sarcasm and skepticism, and she held Freddie's gaze in an attempt to break him down.

He threw up his hands in surrender. "Fine. Maybe it's not _nothing_ but it's definitely not _something_ – you know what I mean?"

She paused to study him. "No! Do you even know what you mean?!" she yelled in frustration.

He let out a long, heavy sigh and crossed his arms over his chest. "I just can't figure her out! She's all mixed signals and mysterious smirks. The girl should come with a manual."

Carly considered and smiled. "You're in luck – she does."

"What is there some how-to guide for understanding the sly touches and unreadable expressions of your feisty and mildly violent best friend who you think might be developing into something more?"

She rolled her eyes. "No – I meant me. I am your all access pass to the mysterious inner-workings of Sam Puckett's mind."

He hesitated and consulted his lap for a response. "I don't know Carly – Sam gets weird about this kind-of stuff."

"I have known Sam since elementary school. If you ever want to figure her out, I'm your best shot."

He seemed to consider his options for a long moment, as he stared towards the far railing on the fire escape. His face was twitching ever so slightly in contemplation and Carly could practically see the various pros and cons running through his mind. Finally he turned to her resolutely.

"Okay – what have you got?"

Carly tried to hold back her glee -- which was difficult considering her immediate reaction was to clap her hands and shriek "yay!" but she attempted to return his gaze in a dignified fashion. "So – let's start with the mixed signals – and did I hear something about sly touches?"

Freddie let out a half groan in protest, but a large smile remained plastered on his face as he babbled on and on about the various moments that had occurred between him and Sam over the past several months and his interpretation of every smirk, hair flick, and nudge. Carly listened in paralyzed shock as Freddie talked about all the times their hands had touched, fingers only lingering at first until they somehow graduated into full on hand holding. "She does this amazing thing where she rubs circles into my palm and drums her fingers across my knuckles." He described how their fights had recently morphed from playful mudslinging to exchanges of loaded innuendos and "all the things that remain unsaid between us." He talked about the time after his fight with Cameron, how he saw a completely different side of Sam when she cleaned up his cuts and bruises.

"We danced on the parkway when you guys got into that fight – I mean not like waltzing – crazy Sam dancing, but she was so amazing, and I thought for sure she wanted to kiss me." This led to an in depth retelling of every 'almost' kiss the two shared, which seemed like a preposterous amount to Carly.

"I asked her to prom." He said nonchalantly, and Carly felt her throat tighten slightly. Finally, he spent what felt like hours hashing out every last detail of their Spokane trip. Carly remembered the trip, and how when they got back she had asked Sam about it. "Freddie's so dorky. You know he has 129 car rules?" They had then spent hours going through the footage Sam had shot of the traffic jam, selecting the best bits for the show, but Sam didn't say anything else about the trip. With each of Freddie's descriptions Carly tried to remember if there was something she had missed. "She nudged her legs between mine – I ended up palming her head like a basketball – she nuzzled my neck and it was the most amazing thing…" How hadn't she mentioned _that_?

Carly was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't realize it when Freddie had stopped his endless Sam monologue. Eventually, his intense gaze registered and she attempted to snap out of her reverie.

"Huh?" She lamely asked.

"What do you think it all means? Does she like me?"

Carly shook her head in disbelief. "I don't know!" She half screamed, as she began shaking her head faster. She realized from the expression on Freddie's face that she probably looked a bit manic, so she attempted to settle herself and looked down at her lap.

Freddie sat motionless by shock for a long moment before quickly placing a reassuring arm around Carly's shoulders.

"Carly? What's wrong?"

Carly jerked her head up. "How could she not tell me any of this? She's my best friend!"

Freddie looked uncomfortable as he removed his arm and returned his hands limply to his lap. "Maybe she didn't think there was anything to tell. I mean what was she supposed to say 'Hey Carly, Freddie and I nudged each other today'?" He attempted a half laugh and a smile in her direction but the brunette was clearly too distressed to take notice.

"Yes!" She threw her arm out. "And clearly, judging by the _epic_ you just delivered, there was something to tell."

"Well maybe Sam doesn't see it the same way, I mean you know Sam."

She let out a humorless guffaw. "Apparently, I don't!"

"Carly!"

She began to pout. "Well it's true. I spent all year worried about grades and SATs and Peter and I didn't even see what was going on right in front of my eyes. She must hate me."

"She doesn't hate you. You're being ridiculous. If there is something going on, which I am not even sure that there is, but if there is, Sam probably prefers not talking about it."

Carly suddenly stood up. "Well that's just too bad, because she's _gonna_ tell me. _And_ she's gonna tell you how she feels." She spoke now with steely resolve and the manic glint seemed to have returned to her eyes.

Freddie gulped. "What do you mean? You can't tell her what I told you."

"Oh – I won't. She is going to tell me all about it on her own."

Freddie's frame seemed to deflate as he looked up at his friend anxiously. "It sounds like you have a-"

"I have a plan!"

He groaned and rolled his head back into his seat. "I was afraid of that."

"Come on Freddie – We have work to do. By the end of the summer, Sam Puckett will be eating out of our hands."

Freddie looked at her retreating form lamely. "What does that even mean?"

*

**A/N: So, there we have it! You finally get to see where the quote from the summary comes from. I debated a long time what to use for the summary, and I felt that Freddie's description of his and Sam's relationship to Carly as "mixed signals and mysterious smirks" provided the best glimpse into the theme of the fic as a whole.**

**Thanks for all of the great feedback so far! Keep it up! Only 2 chapters to go...**


	10. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or The Lone Ranger, though if I did, they would live happily ever after.

Chapter 9

August 1

Sam kicked the crushed can roughly and watched as it scattered down the alley before finally settling next to a dumpster. _Doing my part for the earth _she thought wryly before shoving her hands in her pockets and continuing towards the street. She had already been on two buses and walked over a mile, and she knew without looking at the time that she was seriously late for rehearsal. Carly and Freddie were going to be hoppin' mad and the fact she had stopped halfway for street meat and a nice chat with her favorite vendor probably wouldn't help her case. She had briefly considered calling Freddie to come pick her up, but she had nipped that idea before it had even properly formed in her mind. Over the last few weeks she had realized that she had become far too dependant on her dorky friend and his station wagon, and she was determined to cut the umbilical cord and redefine her independence. After all, she had lived 18 years without really needing anyone, why stop now? Besides, lately Freddie had seemed _different_. She tried to stop herself from automatically associating the change to Carly's return from UW but the connection was undeniable.

She loved Carly, but a miniscule part of her longed for the days it was just her and Freddie hanging out on his fire escape. The last several months had been confusing and tumultuous, and after various semi-intimate moments, she still had no idea where she and the dork stood. But after a month of casual summer lounging on the fire escape, she had thought that maybe their relationship was finally evolving, and though it scared the crap out of her, the way they were going about it seemed comfortable and natural. She just figured one day they would discreetly develop into something more. No life shattering confessions necessary.

She kicked a rock as she automatically recalled the last time she had talked to him. It had been several days ago. She had broken into his apartment before heading over to the Morgans per her usual Thursday routine. After roughly shaking him awake, she had smirked and informed him it was 90 degrees and sunny – perfect pool day. "Grab your speedo and let's go. I'm not becoming a bronzed goddess standing in your room!" He had sat up groggily and sleep had clouded his eyes – looking back on it Sam thought there may have been some other emotion there too but she couldn't begin to try and interpret it. Plus she may have been slightly distracted by his bare chest.

He had told her he had plans. She cringed thinking back on it. Not only had he told her he had plans, but he told her he had plans through the weekend and for the next several days, so he wouldn't see her until rehearsal on Wednesday. It was definitely a brush off. She liked to think that she kept her cool through the exchange, but she had to admit that she had felt rejected, and she feared that some sort of semblance of that had reflected on her face. When had she become so dependant on spending time with the dork?

She lifted her head to the sky and let out a small groan as she finally reached the street and realized she still had a good ten blocks before Bushwell Plaza. Why, oh why could she never figure out bus schedules? She pulled off her red short sleeved hoodie and slung it around her shoulders as the late summer sun beat down on her tired frame.

Her thoughts involuntarily returned to the awkward reunion she was approaching. The Morgans had left for a week in California on Friday night and she hadn't been over to Bushwell Plaza or seen either of her friends since then. When she thought about it, it was probably the longest span of time she had gone without seeing either of them since they started the show. Carly had called a few times, but Freddie had stayed true to his word and hadn't even attempted communication. _Busy with his mysterious plans_ she thought sardonically.

Sam felt what may have been guilt when she thought back on the multiple lame excuses she had delivered to avoid Carly. Her best friend had been acting weird lately too, and if she wasn't so dedicated to Peter, Sam would be convinced there was something going on between her and Freddie. _I'm not totally unconvinced_ she thought to herself as she rounded a corner and began to trek the last three blocks to the familiar apartment complex.

Regardless of the reason, something was up with the brunette. She kept pestering Sam about her feelings, no matter how many times Sam assured Carly she didn't have any feelings, and she kept dropping loaded hints about Sam's love life. She was asking about all of Sam's past relationships and why she thought they had ended. Sam probably couldn't have answered those questions the day of the breakups, much less months after the fact. She would suggest potential set-ups for Sam and occasionally she would start babbling about how handsome Freddie had grown up to be and how all the girls at Ridgeway seemed to notice. Sam assumed that her glares and rolled eyes delivered the necessary message because Carly was generally pretty quick about changing the topic.

After what seemed like forever Sam finally found herself knocking on the familiar apartment door. Carly opened the door widely and stared wordlessly at her friend.

"'Sup Shay?"

Carly let out a short mocking gasp before greeting Sam in a flat, emotionless voice. "Oh look. She lives."

Sam rolled her eyes and followed her friend into the apartment. "I told you the cat was depressed and couldn't be left alone."

Carly looked over her shoulder. "And why is Gravy feeling so blue?"

Sam smiled as she realized Carly wasn't seriously pissed about her lack of communication. "It's this damn stray in our neighborhood. He promised Gravy the world but then he went and knocked up the calico next door. She's heartbroken." Sam plopped down at the table as Carly pulled a bag of popcorn out of the microwave and poured it into a large bowl. "Where's Freddie? I figured the both of you would be gripping each other in anxiety and exchanging mild threats due to my tardiness."

Carly rolled her eyes as she made her way over to the table with the popcorn. "He's not here. I tried to call and tell you that rehearsal was starting late today, but your cell phone was off."

Sam frowned. "Oh – well I'm here now, so let's get the dork and get this thing over with. I'd like to be able to catch the 6:10 bus. That's the only one I know the route for."

Carly shrugged. "Just stay here tonight. Freddie won't be back until later, he is out on a date, _hence_ why we pushed back the rehearsal."

Sam swallowed back a sudden heavy feeling in her throat and worked to keep her face composed and normal. "Hence? Since when do you say hence? And since when do we reschedule iCarly around Freddie's pathetic love life?"

Carly got up and made her way up the stairs, gesturing to Sam to follow with her head. "I like hence. It's like 'via' except with a totally different meaning. I find it very useful in everyday conversation."

Sam followed up the stairs and stared at her back skeptically. "Uh-huh."

"And as for Freddie" Carly turned to look at her meaningfully as they approached the studio door "don't you think it's the least we can do?"

Sam jerked her head back as they entered the studio. "No – crazy person. You can't start giving Freddie power, before you know it he is going to demand billing and his new girlfriend will be on the show doing the weather in zany seasonal costumes."

Carly flopped down on a beanbag and popped a piece of popcorn in her mouth.

"Freddie already gets billing."

Sam scoffed. "You see, the power struggle has already begun!" She plopped down beside Carly and grabbed a handful of popcorn.

"Sam – that is not what I meant. What I meant was Freddie devotes his life to us and the show. We can stand to make a few sacrifices if he wants to go on a date."

"I already make sacrifices! You gave me that weekly limit for on-air Freddie insults and I follow it – mostly." She shoved popcorn in her mouth angrily. "Why couldn't he have his little date after rehearsal?"

Carly kept her face casual. "Because Missy has horseback riding in the evenings."

Sam spit out the popcorn and stared at Carly in horror. "_Missy_ – Missy Wetherington?" She gasped and looked over to Carly for some kind of confirmation. "Freddie is going out with Missy Wetherington?" She thought she was going to be sick.

Carly hid a faint smile and nodded.

Sam frowned and considered an appropriate response. "How can she ride horses with those knockers?"

The grin melted away and Carly was beginning to show some strain on her face and in her voice. "Now Sam, no need to be jealous."

Sam stared at her in confusion. "I'm not jealous. I'm just saying, things would be all off balance." She held her hands in front of her own chest and leaned forward as if to demonstrate.

Carly did not even crack a smile. Sam leaned back into the bean bag chair and grabbed a half empty soda bottle from nearby, hoping that it was relatively fresh. The light bubbles eased her nerves and she looked back over at Carly who seemed to be silently fuming. Sam was suddenly anxious to escape. Things were still weird.

She took another sip from the bottle and stood up, clapping her hands anxiously. "Okay – well when does rehearsal start? I think I'm going to go grab some grub across the street real quick."

Carly looked a little hurt. "We have food downstairs. We haven't hung out all week."

Sam rolled her head back and sighed. "I know – it's just – things have been – since you got back from UW – you and Freddie both-" Eventually she gave up her sad attempts at tact and stared Carly straight on. She jabbed a finger in her direction. "You're being weird."

Carly abruptly stood up and it seemed some vault of pent up anger and frustration crashed open. "I'm being weird?" She spoke at normal volume but the tone and accompanying actions were tense and shrill.

Sam nodded, trying to hold onto her resolve.

Her voice rose. "Well, the only reason I'm being _weird _is because you're being stubborn and difficult!"

Sam threw up her arms in frustration. "I'm always stubborn and difficult!"

Carly glared at her a long moment with her arms crossed before crashing back into the beanbag and sighing in defeat. Sam stood in complete confusion, debating her next move when the brunette suddenly looked up at her.

"Don't you trust me?" Her voice was soft and pleading.

Sam narrowed her eyes. This seemed like a trick. She spoke slowly and took a step towards the cluster of beanbags. "Yes."

"Then why won't you confide in me?"

Sam plopped down beside her friend. "Carly – I have no idea what you're talking about. Can you just stop with all the tricks and games and come out with it?" She picked up the bottle and took another long sip in attempt to somehow breakup the tense filled discussion.

Carly seemed angry again. "Fine! Why didn't you tell me you were in love with Freddie?"

Sam felt like she had just been punched. She had expected several different scenarios, a few of them involving Carly actually punching her, but she had not expected this. Love? Seriously? Root beer fell out of her mouth as her jaw went slack with surprise. "What?" she finally said.

Carly seemed unimpressed by the display. "You know what!" She began to gesticulate madly. "You and Freddie have this whole secret relationship and you don't even tell me? We are supposed to be best friends!"

Sam's eyes widened. Well so much for a discreet and natural transition. "Carly, I didn't tell you because I'm pretty sure there is nothing to tell. I don't know who you have been getting your information from but Freddie and I are _not_ in some secret relationship – he's on a date with someone else right now for cryin' out loud!"

Carly sighed in exasperation. "He's only on a date because you won't tell him you have feelings for him!" She shot Sam a steady glare. "We both know it."

"What?" Sam was now totally confused. "We? Who is this 'we' Kemosabe?"

Carly's eyes widened slightly and Sam knew instantly that somehow the tables had turned in her favor. "What we? There's no we. Who's talking about a we. I'm talking about me, just me. Singular. Me. A-lone. Just a Lone Ranger. No Kemosabe in sight." She spoke with a slightly erratic cadence and was staring around the studio, refusing to meet Sam's skeptical stare.

"Carly." Sam grabbed her friend's hand and quickly bit into it.

"Ow! Sam. What have I said about biting?"

"Who is we?"

Carly let out a heavy sigh. "Fine! Me and Freddie, but its not what you think!"

Sam ignored her as she felt the blood rush to her face in a mixture of anger and embarassment. "The dork told you I had feelings for him? Like 'love' feelings?"

Carly was flustered, and she shook her head as she seemed to search for the right words that would function as the escape hatch for her current situation while Sam just gaped, a million thoughts running through her head.

In a universe of the absolute best or absolute worst timing possible, depending on your viewpoint, the elevator dinged open at that exact moment and Freddie casually emerged.

"Hey guys." He waved his hand as he approached his tech cart, still blissfully unaware of the oncoming storm.

Sam clenched her fists.

Carly jerked her head towards her friend with wide eyes. "Sam…" Carly started slowly, as if she was talking a jumper off a ledge.

Sam shook her head and sprung to her feet. She marched quickly and angrily over to Freddie, who seemed to suddenly be aware of the tension consuming the room.

"Sam, hey…"

Any greeting he planned was abruptly cut off as she wrenched back her arm and propelled her fist directly toward his face. She felt the most miniscule part of her anger evaporate as she felt the solid connection between her fist and his jaw. He stumbled back a step, as his hand immediately went to his jaw and he stared at her in shock. His eyes watered slightly but it only served to fuel her anger. She punctuated the sudden violence by taking a quick step forward and placing both of her palms directly on his chest and shoving hard, sending Freddie sprawling backwards and off his feet which were tangled up in some electrical wiring hanging off the cart.

With barely a glance at either of her friends, Sam stormed out of the studio.

"Choke on those feelings!" She yelled behind her as the door swung shut.

*

**A/N - I struggled slightly with this one. I still don't feel like its right, but to be honest, I'm thinking its time to wrap this baby up, so I did less edits than I normally would have liked. I didn't want Carly to come off as the bad guy but I also needed to justify Sam punching Freddie at the end. Not that Sam really needs a reason to punch Freddie, but you know. Also, a few interesting tidbits. If you didn't get the Kemosabe reference, it is from the Lone Ranger, randomly, which I actually know very little about outside the Kemosabe/we reference, but it sounded like something Sam would say so I decided to throw it in for kicks. Also, this is the only chapter in the entire series that doesn't take place in a stairwell or a car.**


	11. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Even after 10 chapters, I still don't own iCarly.

Chapter 10

August 18

Freddie groaned as Carly offered up another of countless cheesy scenarios that she had dreamed up for him to reunite with Sam.

"You said 'love' and 'Freddie' in the same sentence and reacted by bruising my face and pushing me over. I can take a hint."

Carly shot him a brief skeptical look, and Freddie couldn't help but assume that she was thinking back over the many years he had pursued her relentlessly, despite her best efforts to stop him. "Come on Freddie – she clearly has feelings for you. Sam just doesn't really know how to handle any feelings outside the realms of mischief and violence."

"Well she definitely has violence down." He rubbed absently at his tender jaw. The bruise had pretty much disappeared but the skin still felt slightly different than the rest of his face due to the countless treatments his mother had applied over the past few weeks.

"Yeah, well, you know…" Carly trailed off and glanced around the room, refusing to meet his gaze. He knew that she still felt guilty about the whole Sam blow up, and he should reassure her with some comforting denial of fault. But the problem was, he sort of blamed Carly for it all – okay totally blamed Carly for it all. Sure the idea of Sam showing up at his door and professing her love for him was --- tempting. But he knew it was not traditional Sam. He rolled his neck in frustration. He should have known trying to trick Sam into admitting – well whatever it was between them -- would have blown up in his face. Literally. Initially he had been furious at the aggressive blonde over her sudden attack. He felt the punishment certainly did not fit the crime. But Sam never gave him the chance to express that. She actually didn't give him the chance to bring up the situation at all. Apparently, in her selective memory, the entire thing had never transpired.

He looked back at Carly. "I actually prefer the punching, shoving, and screaming version of Sam to the current version."

She nodded sadly. "I know -- me too."

They simultaneously let their heads fall back on the couch with heavy sighs.

Sam didn't handle anger in the way other girls did. She had the avoidance part down, but the problem was the web show forced her to come in regular contact with Carly and Freddie. He had expected her to spit in his face and fling insults at him every chance she got, but instead she remained calm and aloof. She put on a show for the cameras, but when the red light blinked off, Sam would usually just throw out a "good show people" and with a mocking salute, she would disappear. In rehearsals she did her part, but contributed as little as possible to any personal interruptions. They were co-workers, he thought glumly - just co-workers.

Carly had tried to talk to her a few times, but this was when Sam's adept techniques developed over years of avoiding any major trouble with the law came in handy. "It's like, she had me talking in circles and in the end I was buying her a cheeseburger and talking about the dangers of Mad Cow disease!" Freddie had tried too, but how can you fix a problem when the other party refuses to admit there is one?

He looked over at Carly. "I'm going to head home."

She nodded and he slowly stood up from the couch and made his way to the door.

"Freddie" he turned around at the anxious and desperate tones coming from his usually collected friend. "She's going to come around." He might have believed her if she wasn't looking to him for some desperate reassurance.

He shrugged noncommittally and exited the stifling apartment.

It was after nine, and his mom was still out on her date. She had started seeing a pharmacist a few months prior and from the way things were going, Freddie couldn't help but assume that a wedding was in his near future. It was nice in some ways, the developing romance gave his overbearing Mom other distractions, allowing Freddie more freedom than he had experienced in years. The problem of course was the fact that she no longer provided him with the same distraction, giving him way too much time to obsessively worry about the blonde stuck in his head. He threw himself on his bed and stared at the large window visible from the hallway. If he squinted he could see the same window flooded with sunlight and hear a familiar voice demanding filet mignon for lunch from the fire escape landing. He let out a heavy sigh and clutched his pillow over his face. He was pretty sure hearing voices was the first sign of insanity.

After little debate, he reached blindly for his phone on the bedside table. When his fingers finally grasped the familiar sleek shape, he pulled it beneath the pillow with him. He clicked out the sequence of numbers automatically and listened to the taunting rings.

"Hello?"

He flung the pillow off his face and jolted up in his bed, clutching the phone in disbelief. "Sam? Hey it's Freddie."

"Hellloooo?"

His gripped his phone tighter in his frustration. "Sam? Can you hear me?"

"Ha-ha. Gotcha. Sam here- well I guess actually I'm not here but after the beep promise me food and I promise I'll call you back – well maybe, I'm actually not that reliable of a person."

He fell back down into the mattress with the sound of the familiar beep. "New message. Tricky – I like it. Anyways, I promise you whatever food you want – ham, chicken, steaks, burgers, and other meat products in large quantities if you call me back." He let out a long breath. "I know that you're doing your invisible ninja act on me, but you have to talk to me at some point. And we need to talk about…well about everything. And…you know what" he sat up quickly "never mind, we _have_ to talk about everything. I'm coming over and I'll sit outside your window all night if I have to, and eventually you are going to have to…" the beep indicating the end of the message rang in his ear but he was too distracted to be bothered by it. He quickly pulled on his shoes, some new found resolve propelling him forward.

He scribbled out a note for his mom and grabbed a box of Fatcakes and his rain jacket as he dashed out the door. He hoped the snacks might be used as a bribe and though Seattle skies had been pleasant and clear all day, the tiny image of a rain cloud and lighting bolt had flashed at him ominously from the corner of his phone throughout the day, promising a 70% chance of severe thunderstorms.

He was pulling out of Bushwell Plaza's parking lot when his phone rang beside him. He glanced over and saw Sam's familiar smirking image.

"Hello?"

"Hey Freddork." He smiled brightly at the familiar nickname. "'Sup?"

"I'm on my way to your house."

"Impossible. You can't be simultaneously driving and talking on the cell phone – you signed a contract boy."

He smirked. "What can I say – I'm a rebel."

She let out an appreciative laugh and he felt elated and confused by how normally the conversation was progressing. "Sure you are. Well don't go breakin' the mold for me, James Dean."

"I should be there in less than ten minutes."

She paused and sighed heavily into the phone. "Listen Fredward – that's why I'm calling. I got your message, and it sounded like you were heading to my house to make some dorky attempt to re-enact a bad chick flick, but you can't go there."

He rolled his eyes, glad for once that the gesture would be lost on her. "Sam – I'm on my way there. I was serious, we have to talk."

"Well turn around, I'm not at my house."

He narrowed his eyes and scoffed. "I'm not falling for that. If you're not there I'll wait for you. I brought snacks."

"What kind of snacks?" The automatic response made him smile, but before he could answer she continued. "– you know what, never mind, it doesn't matter. I'm not at my house and I am not going back tonight. I told my mom I was spending the night at Carly's, so if you show up asking questions, she might think something is up."

"Are you spending the night at Carly's?"

"No genius – hence the problem."

"Hence?"

"It's a Carly word."

"Ahh – so if you aren't spending the night at Carly's and you're not going home, where are you going?"

"Not your concern." She attempted to sound snarky, but he could feel her nerves coming out in the words.

"Sam! Are you running away?"

"What?! No, drama queen. Do you know how much work running away entails?" He pursed his lips, and the truth behind her reasoning served to slightly ease his nerves. He heard someone else talking to her and perked up in curiosity. "Hold on" she directed at him, before somehow muffling her phone. He could make out snippets of words she was saying to the mysterious other party – was she talking about blueberries?

Suddenly his eyes lit up in understanding and he swung the Volvo around to cross lanes and head back towards Bushwell Plaza, ignoring the angry honks and rude gestures coming from the cars surrounding him. He was momentarily distracted when Sam suddenly turned her attention back to him, and as he bumped the curb he suddenly saw the purpose to his mother's contract. "So anyways Fredward – we're good. No need for any of this 'talking' business."

"Sam – we have to talk about everything."

"_Everything_? Really – I don't have the time or patience for that."

"You know what I mean."

She let out a deep breath. "We're good Freddie – there is nothing else to talk about."

He could feel her preparing to end the conversation, but as he pulled up beside the curb and hopped out of the station wagon he felt a desperate need to keep her on the line. He wanted to create a moment.

"I could buy you dinner. That would give us a chance to talk."

"Am I speaking Mandarin? I told you dork, I'm _busy_."

Her voice was joking, but he could tell by the hunch of her shoulders and the way she was playing with her hair that she was nervous. He smiled as he came up behind her hunched form at their regular table. "Well at least let me buy you a smoothie."

She spun around, her phone still attached to her ear as she looked at him in shock. She slowly snapped her phone shut and met his eyes. "Freddie – what the hell are you doing here?" She spoke with anger and was glancing nervously over his shoulder, but he ignored her and moved around to the other side of the table and sat in the seat across from her.

"I told you – we need to talk." He smiled widely, glad to have finally cornered the elusive ninja.

She turned back to face him, nerves painted all over her expression and movements. "No – you need to go. Like now."

He sighed and pushed back his hair. "Sam – Come on. I know things are weird but…"

"One Blueberry Banana Blitz with two energy boosters – though the girl at the counter said it went against her better judgment to give it to you."

Freddie stared up at the tall intruder incredulously.

"Shane?" His throat was tightening and he could almost feel all the color leave his face. "What are you doing here?"

Shane turned to him and laughed. "Hey Freddie. Shouldn't I be asking you that?" He scooted his seat right next to Sam and casually threw his arm around her shoulders. The casual movement was too familiar for Freddie to handle, and he looked over at Sam, needing some sort of acknowledgement, something to tell him that this was just an innocent smoothie with an old friend. She refused to offer up anything though, as she nervously twisted her straw, and didn't look up at either of her companions.

Shane was now glancing between the two of them, and he could see the other boy straining to understand whatever developing scene he had just walked in upon.

Freddie cleared his throat, and hoped his voice wouldn't betray him. "I was just grabbing a smoothie and saw Sam. I didn't know she was on a date." He trained his gaze on her, and her eyes flicked up for the briefest of moments to meet his before she looked away again and lifted her smoothie to her lips in strained nonchalance. _This is your cue Sam. Deny it's a date _he thought desperately to himself.

Shane laughed. "No big deal – you're welcome to join us."

Sam looked over at Shane in frustration as Freddie slowly shook his head. "No – suddenly I'm not really in the mood for a smoothie after all."

"Well, next time then." Shane was smiling, and he had no idea that Freddie was currently actively restraining himself from kicking the other boy under the table and ripping his arm away from her shoulders.

Freddie just shrugged, and again tried to meet Sam's eyes. "Yeah – another time." Suddenly his earlier conversation with Sam began to replay itself in his head and he looked between them, nauseous at the thought. "What are you two crazy kids up to tonight?" His voice sounded wobbly and weak to him, but if Shane noticed, he didn't let on.

"Oh – my parents are out of town so we were just going to hang out at my house." He had the nerve to wink.

"Really?" Now he knew that his voice sounded strangled, and he knew he needed to get out of here, go home before any further humiliation. But first he needed something from Sam, _anything_ to let him know he wasn't alone in this feeling of betrayal and loss.

Finally, after a few awkward moments of staring her down, she looked up at him. Her eyes looked tired and confused, but she tried to play it off with a shrug of her shoulders that unintentionally pushed her further into the crook of Shane's arm. "We are going to have a horror movie marathon."

If this was meant to be reassuring it missed the mark in a totally tragic way. "Oh." Freddie nodded once and looked down at the table. "Well, I better go."

Shane nodded and smiled, and when he winked again Freddie was prepared to rip the straw out of his strawberry splat and shove it up his nose, but instead he just frowned and exited the small colorful space without another word. He sat in his car for several minutes, and the rain finally began to splatter on his windshield as he waited for someone he knew wouldn't come.

* * *

Freddie fell into a fitful and angry sleep, which was not ideal but certainly beat out the alternative emotions he had to select from. He couldn't get the image of them together out of his head. She was all sarcasm and long blonde hair and he was all tall and _winky_. He felt like an idiot, obsessing over her for the last several months, turning every little interaction into an epic of hidden signs, and meanwhile, she was off finding her next boyfriend. He hated her. He had hated her before, he could certainly hate her again. He just had to remind himself of all her faults. She was mean, she was sarcastic, she was emotionally stunted and immature, she was violent, she was gross----dirty----loud----obnoxious---demanding----aggressive----impossible. That is what it all really came down to. She was impossible. They were impossible.

His dreams were erratic and disconnected. Real memories and fantasies combined to create an impossible illusion within his mind.

He could smell her hair, he could hear her whisper his name, he could feel her tugging at him insistently ---

"Sam?" The darkness of the room and her hood obstructed the majority of her expression, but she was standing with one shoulder hitched and her hands in her back pockets, a posed and practiced indifference expertly projected.

She nodded her head towards the hallway. "Come on." He couldn't tell if her voice was hoarse or if she was simply attempting to whisper.

He sleepily followed her out into the hall and through the large window to the fire escape. Rain was falling in sheets around them and the sky lit up every few minutes followed immediately by resounding booms of thunder. "The storm is right on top of us." He spoke just to have something to do, a way to break up the deafening silence between them.

She just nodded and shrugged as she pulled her bright hoodie a little closer around her damp body and fell haphazardly into the camping chair she had marked as her own in the months prior. He followed her actions, again, he thought, just for something to do.

Usually, in better times, they would both have slung their legs on the shared ottoman, crossing them over one another's, tangling their calves, feet, and toes, but tonight Freddie pushed the ottoman away with the ball of his bare foot, and kept his feet firmly planted on the cool concrete. She had her hands buried deep within the oversized pockets on the hoodie, and had folded her entire body into the chair in a way that left one knee exposed through a rip in her jeans and her face completely turned to face Freddie.

They sat there, settling themselves in, listening to the rain and the thunder, before Freddie finally turned to her. "What are you doing here?" Disgust and anger dripped off every word as he looked her square in the eye.

She cocked her eyebrow at his tone, but apparently selected to ignore it, or accept it, because she simply shrugged. "You're the one that insisted we have to talk." She dropped his gaze for a moment to look around the fire escape. "I figured this was the most appropriate place to discuss _everything_." She smirked briefly before she seemed to realize that he was not going to play along. She rolled her eyes and buried her face in her shoulder, looking away from him and shielding herself off slightly by the patterned fabric of her hood.

He scoffed, but otherwise remained silent. Several minutes passed, and despite the hour and the soothing sounds of the rain, he was only getting more worked up than before. He cleared his throat noisily, and when she looked over at him curiously he shot her a frustrated expression.

This time she did match it, widening her eyes slightly and freeing one arm to wave it at him. "So---_talk_."

He let out a humorless laugh and glared at her. "Maybe I wanted to talk before – but I don't really see the point now."

Her frustration seemed to change and expand. She rolled her eyes and turned her face to the Seattle skyline. "You're such a dork."

He leaned forward in his chair and made to stand up. "Well then, leave! I don't know why the hell you are here anyways - go back to Shane! I don't care anymore Sam! I don't know why I ever cared." The calm exterior he had worked so hard to compose crumbled as he abandoned his seat and his voice rose in his anger. "You can't just show up here after everything that has happened, and act all----" He struggled to find the word, but when no appropriate adjective came he just growled out in frustration instead.

"Sit down." She demanded it in mocking tones, as if his anger humored her in some bizarre way.

"No!" he crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at her, hoping that his eyes weren't betraying his uncertainty. "I want you to leave."

Her expression changed slightly but she made no move to stand. "Sit down Freddie." She pushed back the damp curls hanging from beneath her hood and let out a small sigh. "Please?"

He glared at her for a few seconds longer before slowly lowering himself in his seat. "Fine" he huffed out.

She wasn't paying attention to his display though because she was nervously watching the still open window leading to the apartment. "And can you watch the volume on your hissy fits? If your mom hears us she is going to freak."

"She's not here."

She turned from the window and looked at him in confusion. "Dude - its one o'clock in the morning."

"I know. Apparently Chris's road flooded and she couldn't drive so she is staying the night at his house."

"Ahhhhh." She said it in a knowing way and shot him a sly smile. "Way to go Mrs. B"

"Shut up" he was mumbling but still holding her gaze with his own cold stare. "I'm sure they are just having a horror movie marathon." He meant the words to be harsh, and received the desired effect when she turned her gaze downward and played with the loose ties hanging off her hood.

"Yeah." She bit her lip in a completely fascinating kind of way. "Freddie – about tonight…"

He quickly interrupted her. "I don't want to know." The clipped tone in his voice helped convince him that the statement was true.

She rolled her head back into the back of her seat and let out a long sigh. "Fine."

He was so angry, so over her lazy expressions and detached responses. "It's one in the morning Sam – why the hell are you here instead of with Shane? What, did he kick you out afterwards?" He wiped his mouth clean after spitting out the question.

She looked straight at him and seemed slightly confused. "After what?"

"You know what!"

She let out a surprised guffaw and shook her head in disbelief. "Oh come on, you can't think…" She trailed off and looked at him expectantly.

"Have you two been going out since Prom?" He had to ask the question. He couldn't get visions of Sam meeting up with Shane after spending the day with Freddie, laughing over his dorky attempts to woo her, out of his head. Though a part of him realized how unlikely this was, he wouldn't put anything past her at this point.

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, in all the free time I had when I wasn't here." She spoke sarcastically, and he glared at her. Something seemed to finally click because she looked down at her lap and assumed a more serious tone. "We're not even going out. We were just…" He could tell she was struggling to define what exactly it was she and Shane were 'just' doing. "…hanging out." She finally finished and glanced up at him.

He scoffed. "Oh, so that's what the kids are calling it these days."

She shot him a look. "Freddie – what I have been trying to tell you is that" she looked down at her bare knee and played with the denim fringe "no fried chicken exchanged hands tonight" she looked up to him with a smirk, but her eyes were clearly examining him for his reaction "or any other meat products either." Her face squinched. "Or any other nights for that matter." She looked contemplative as she spoke and he could tell she was getting slightly lost in her own metaphor. She wasn't the only one slightly lost, but he got the gist.

"Oh." His response sounded lame to his own ears, so he could only imagine what he must sound like to her. But she simply nodded her head, and turned back to the fringed hole in her jeans. "Well why not?"

The question seemed to catch her off guard as she jerked her head up to meet his steady gaze. "What?"

"Why didn't you, um, exchange fried chicken?" He stumbled slightly over his words, partially due to the nervous tension attached to the question and partially due to the fact that he wasn't 100% certain what that particular metaphor was supposed to represent exactly.

She seemed to become slightly exasperated. "I don't know Freddie – because you showed up and messed with my head!"

He allowed himself to smile for the first time since her arrival. "Really?"

She leaned farther back into the corner of her chair. "Yeah, you nub. After you left the Groovy Smoothie all I could think about was you and your dorky attempts at trying to work things out."

"Why?" He was smirking slightly now and well aware that he was pushing his luck.

She threw her arms up. "Why _what_?"

"Why couldn't you stop thinking about me?"

"You're pushing it Fredward."

He rolled his eyes. "Can't you just say it Sam?"

She looked at him lazily and jutted out her lips in consideration. After a long moment, she shook her head slowly, playfully, her long curls swayed beneath the hood and a smile played at the corner of her lips. "Nope. It's too tragic to voice out loud."

He rolled hsi eyes and she extended her bent leg to clutch the arm of his chair with the crook of her foot. She tugged his chair closer and shoved it to the side so it sat at an angle where her legs could fall across his lap comfortably. He absent mindedly rested his arms around her knees and drummed his fingers along the soft damp fabric of her jeans. After a brief pause, her smirk melted to a more serious expression. Freddie watched her as she seemed to wage a minor war in her head. Finally, she gathered her breath, and looked up at him.

"I'm sorry, okay? You know, for everything."

He nodded. Part of him wanted to address what exactly 'everything' entailed, but there were too many unknown factors in pursuing that path. Instead, he concentrated on the present moment.

"So----what are we exactly?" The question was bold. He would never have been able to ask it a few months ago, hell a few days ago, but somehow, things seemed different now.

She groaned and lightly shoved at his chair with her foot. "You aren't seriously trying to have the 'define the relationship' conversation now."

He shrugged. "We have to figure it out sometime."

She smiled and yawned widely. "The only thing I need to figure out is where the hell I'm sleeping tonight."

He shot her a toothy grin. "You can stay here."

She nodded twice and her face twitched as it struggled to control her own growing smile. She yawned again in an attempt to cover it. "Beats sleeping at the bus station." She removed her legs from his lap and stretched as she stood from the chair. She shoved her hands back in her pockets and nodded towards him. "Come on – I need my beauty sleep."

He rolled his eyes but stood up as well. He took two steps closer to her as she turned to shove the chair out of the way in order to be able to climb back in through the large window. As she made her way towards the wide sill, Freddie lightly tugged the back of her hoodie, and she turned towards him in questioning. He stared at her for a long moment and she stared back, her hands still safely hidden in her pockets. He reached forward and tugged lightly at the zipper hanging from the top of the hoodie, pulling her towards him. She responded by taking a half step closer to him and extracting one hand to lightly grip the bottom edge of his blue t-shirt. She bobbed one shoulder playfully and chuckled as she took another half step closer. "What you trying to do here Fredward?"

He frowned slightly as he tipped her chin up gently with his knuckles, revealing her smirking expression from beneath her hood. "Can't you ever just shut up?"

She shrugged and before she could bite out a witty retort, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. He could tell she was slightly shocked by the way her lips were just slightly open when he made his move, and it took her several seconds to respond. Once she did start responding, he broke contact and looked at her. She was still gripping the bottom of his t-shirt and seemed confused and slightly angered by the sudden interlude. He wrapped one arm around her waist and smirked. "You're going to break my arm now, right?"

She rolled her eyes and laughed, caught up in the same distant memory as him. "Nope" and he used his hold on her to pull her back towards him and her lips connected so perfectly with his, and when he slanted his face slightly she automatically responded. His teeth grazed her bottom lip and she sighed softly into his mouth, and as he breathed her air he nibbled her bottom lip and she pulled roughly at his shirt and tangled her other hand in the hair at the nape of his neck. Suddenly she was sucking his lip, and he was kissing the corner of her mouth. Her mouth was damp and hot. She pulled at his bottom lip with her teeth, and when he opened in response, she took the opportunity to tease the inside of his lips with her tongue. And what were once tentative and soft movements became rushed and hard. She was pushing into him and he was pushing back. They were pulling and tugging and awkwardly stumbling about. He was kissing the spot just between her ear and her neck and she was digging her nails into his shoulder blade. They were covering distance, but both seemed unaware of moving. Freddie tripped and one foot stumbled into the inflatable pool with a splash and she laughed into his mouth. He responded by kissing her harder, not ready to break the moment or mood, and pushing her away from the hazardous pool area. Suddenly her back was pressed against the wall away from the window, and the slanted rain and sudden gusts of wind were behind her, lifting the ends of her hair as her haphazard cotton hood finally fell all the way off. She broke away from him and leaned her head back into the downpour as he tightened his grip around her waist.

When she righted herself she wrapped her arms around his neck and he examined her soaking wet hair and dripping face with a smirk.

"You're crazy, you know that right?"

She gave a half shrug in response. "Thats what the court appointed shrink tells me." He smiled and began to blow feather light kisses all along her neck and jaw before she pushed his head slightly to meet her lips and the movements became hungry and desperate once again. Just as he was nibbling her lip and rubbing circles into her lower back, he felt a light vibration against his thigh.

"Hmmmm" he attempted to communicate without breaking the kiss but she quickly cut him off with her own mouth. When the vibration happened again, he removed one hand from her back and dug it into the front pocket of her jeans to extract the offending object. The action seemed to remove her from her daze and she detached herself from his face and looked down at the phone as he handed it to her. Freddie set to work on sucking on her neck and nibbling at her ear as she remained concentrated on the lightly glowing screen.

"Whose texting you at one a.m.?" he asked absently as he became enthralled with the spattering of freckles behind her ear and along her hair line.

"Carly."

He loosened his hold and leaned back to look at her. "Carly?"

She smiled lightly at his confusion. "I went there first." Without further explanation, she handed him her phone before returning his earlier attentions by mimicking the kisses he placed along her neck.

Sam's actions proved to be highly distracting so Freddie barely registered the words of the text.

_I assume you got your dork._

_*_

**A/N: I'm not marking this fic as complete yet because I am debating an epilogue. I think stories with prologues generally need epilogues (balance baby) and I have an idea for one that has been in the back of my head since I started the fic, but it has yet to leave my head and leap on the page, so no promises.**

**Let me know what you thought about the 'final' chapter.**


	12. Epilogue

Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of iCarly. I am simply borrowing Dan Schneider's characters for my own enjoyment.

**A/N - The fact that it has taken me so long to post this is why I try to complete a story before putting it up on the site. I figure some of you may be fuzzy on what happened in the previous 10 chapters, but if you remember the 2nd half of chapter 3, you should get all of the references in the epilogue. I think. Who knows.**

Epilogue

September 27

His phone buzzed along his desk, moving closer to the edge with each vibration and Freddie looked up from his note cards wearily. He was only half way through the 500+ terms that were promised to show up on his AP Biology midterm in a week, and he had sworn to himself dutifully that he would ignore any and all distractions until he had completed the daunting task. The phone vibrated again, and with a shallow sigh, Freddie reached for it and clicked to open up the awaiting text message.

_Where are you? Why aren't you replying? I need to talk to you!! It's important!_

He frowned worriedly at the urgent text, and scrolled through the numerous previous texts from Carly, each becoming more and more frantic with the lack of his response. He had a sinking suspicion that the "emergency" matter was somehow attached to one of Sam's schemes. She was constantly figuring out ways to pull him away from his important studies to feed her, or banter with her, or, you know, do _other stuff _with her_…_which he usually didn't mind, but dating Sam had seriously depleted his perfect GPA. He had received a B- on the first Bio exam, which was _not _part of the Freddie Benson 4-year plan.

With one final sigh, he neatly stacked his color coded note cards, snapped an elastic around them, and pushed them aside, resigned with the fact that the remainder of his Biology exam preparation would have to wait until later.

He crossed the hall and entered the familiar apartment without the usual preamble of knocking and was immediately greeted by Carly's anxious form.

"Oh good, you're here." Her words came out rushed and nervous.

Freddie took in the frazzled state of his usually collected best friend and his frustration was instantly replaced with concern. "Yeah. I got your text. Is everything okay?"

"Yuh-huh." Her wide eyes darted around the apartment as she spun the top off of the water bottle she held and guzzled a few sips before sloppily reattaching the cap and letting her arm fall back down lamely to her side.

"Carly, What's going on? Did something happen?" He followed her gaze around the surprisingly still and quiet apartment. "Where's Spencer?" His eyes widened slightly with a sudden realization. "Where's Sam?"

At the mention of the third in their trio's name, Carly's eyes widened even further as she nibbled nervously on her bottom lip. "Ummmm..."

Freddie lifted his brow in worry. "Did she eat the potato salad? I told her not too! It was a week past its expiration date! I knew she would get sick!"

"She's not sick...at least not physically." With a light flick of her wrist and a humorless huff, Carly brushed aside his worry and began to pace back and forth in front of him. Freddie took a step back, cocking his head in an idiotic display of his own confusion as he watched his friend walk pass, pause in front of him, open her mouth to speak, and ultimately shake her head in indecision before repeating the entire process. She mumbled quietly to herself as she paced the length of the couch, Freddie picking up pieces of what sounded like "crazy best friend" and "ludicrous" and "hussy". Around the 4th loop, Freddie cleared his throat loudly. "Ummm – Carly, are you feeling okay? You're acting kind of…loony."

She spun around to face him. "_I'm _not the nutty one!" She threw her arm up in the air, catching a piece of her dark hair on her ring and jerking it upwards in the process. "Ow!"

He narrowed his eyes slightly in response and took an automatic step back. "Did _you_ eat the potato salad?"

She avoided his gaze as she worked to untangle the chunk of hair from the small gem stone Peter had given her before leaving for College, but Freddie still caught the roll of her eyes. "No! No one ate the flippin' potato salad!"

He shoved his hands in his pocket and examined her closely. "Okay? Well where is everyone? Is everyone okay?" They both knew the real questions weren't quite as broad, but directed more to the whereabouts and well being of one particular trouble maker.

Her hair free, and tangled in a knot on the side of her head, Carly finally shifted to face Freddie straight on. She took another sip of her water before collecting her breath and looking him in the eye. "Everyone's fine. Sam's at-" she glanced around the room, her eye's finally settling on the barbells Spencer used as bookends "- the gym." As soon as the word left her mouth she cringed in realization.

"The gym?"

"Uh-huh."

"Like working out?"

Carly scoffed and squinched her face in overplayed humor at the statement. "Of course not! She is at the gym for a-" another quick scan of the apartment led her gaze to the open carton of eggs on the counter "Easter egg hunt!" Her obvious delight in the statement was slightly suspicious.

"It's September."

"So! There's not a law that says you can only have Easter egg hunts on Easter. Hunting out eggs full of delicious candy is a fun pastime year round!"

Freddie let out a slow breath and widened his eyes, partially in disbelief and partially in defeat. "I am so confused."

"I texted you to come hang out with me. Is that so weird?" She looked down, and by the restlessness of her feet Freddie feared she may start pacing and ranting again, but after a short moment, she gathered her breath and let out a resolved sigh before she took a half step forward and squeezed his arm awkwardly. "I just wanted to see you, you handsome boy – I mean man! You handsome man-boy." Her eyes grew a little wider as she let out a forced chuckle and quickly dropped her hold in order to return to her original position.

Freddie stared down at where Carly had grabbed him in confusion. "Ummmmm – okay? But your text said it was an emergency."

She nodded slowly. "Ummm yes…..a love emergency." She choked slightly on the awkward words.

"A _what_?"

"Oh you heard me" she snapped, jutting the water bottle towards him.

He took a step back and examined her in concern, attempting to wade through the hurricane of mood changes he witnessed through the last few minutes. After a long moment, his own frustration finally bubbled over. "Carly! What is going on?! What do you mean a 'love emergency'?" In an instant his confusion morphed to a dreaded understanding. He stepped towards Carly and jabbed a finger at her in fear and anger. "Is Sam breaking up with me?"

Carly just returned his stare in a shocked silence.

"Man! I figured if this ever happened she wouldn't have the decency to do it in person, but I figured she would do it via text, or through a blog maybe, but having you do it for her is too low! Even for Sam!"

Carly grabbed his arm, which had been flailing about angrily, and steadied her gaze on his red and angry face.

"Sam is not breaking up with you."

He examined her expression for any signs of deceit, and when it appeared she was telling the truth, he took a moment to calm his breathing and push back his anger. "Oh." He flushed slightly in embarrassment. "Well, what is the love emergency then?"

His regained composure and repetition of her earlier words evaporated her temporary calmness and she immediately picked back up her nervous pacing, twisting the cap of her water on and off continuously and taking sporadic sips from the bottle. Freddie watched in confusion as she passed back and forth in front of him for the gazillionth time, and just as she put the bottle to her lips to take another nervous pull of water, he reached out and grabbed her arm, causing a splash of water to her face but successfully preventing any continued frantic movement.

Carly swiped at her face angrily. "Freddie! Now my face is damp!"

He ignored her and steadied his own resolve. "Carly, what is going on?"

"I, uh- uh, ummm I-uh" the usually together brunette stuttered and stumbled within his grip, desperately looking around the apartment as if the furniture or décor would hold some kind of answer for her. After a long moment, she finally seemed to give up the mission and with a heavy breath, met Freddie's gaze. Her mouth had barely opened to speak when a loud chime erupted from her pocket.

"One sec." Carly held up a finger to Freddie and reached into her pocket for her phone. The movement forced Freddie to realize he still had a strong grip on her shoulder and he let his arm fall lamely back to his side and moved to put an additional half step of distance between them.

Carly frowned at the text message and scoffed in disbelief.

"What is it?"

Her eyes widened slightly again as she looked back up at Freddie and something heavy in Freddie's stomach dropped. Carly was acting bizarre and nervous around him, and Sam was apparently hunting Easter eggs in September at a gym, and Freddie was seized by a sudden desire to flee for the hills as fast as possible.

She ignored his question, and her eyes narrowed to their regular size as she discovered some new-found confidence. She steadied her breath and cleared the distance between her and Freddie so she could lay her hand on his shoulder in the same place she had grabbed him before. Though their positioning was bordering on intimate, Carly avoided Freddie's eyes and instead kept her gaze trained on the lightly glowing screen of her cell phone.

"Freddie, I am in love with you. I want to be with you. I can't stop thinking about you. You are the…" she paused from her mechanic speech and squinted slightly "the microprocessor that keeps my mobo going." Carly lifted her brow in confusion. "Mobo? I think I mean mojo."

His response was automatic. "Mobo – like motherboard."

"Oh. Well yes then, you really get my mobo going." She shot him a wobbly half smile

Silence encompassed the apartment as Freddie attempted to digest the situation. Something was off, outside of the totally random confession. He needed to take a step back so he could see things logically, figure out what the hell was going on, but Carly did not show any sign of loosening her iron grip on his arm.

When the silence moved on from being awkward to downright unbearable, Carly cleared her throat in a way that strongly suggested he respond.

"Carly, I – uhhhh…" He mimicked her earlier nerves by avoiding her gaze and scanning the apartment. Without looking at her, he muttered "Sam" hoping that the one word would say everything he couldn't articulate at the moment.

Her cell phone saved him from further stuttering by again chiming in her hand, and he silently thanked whoever was interrupting this awkward scene.

She let out a frustrated whine as she read the new message. After a second she finally dropped her arm and looked tentatively towards Freddie.

"Freddie, you know you and I are meant to be together. Sam will understand. You can't come between soul mates." She swallowed visibly and let out a heavy sigh before squinting her eyes shut and puckering her lips towards Freddie. He stared at her in stunned silence.

"Uh Carly? What are you doing?"

She half opened one eye, but kept her lips determinedly puckered. "This is where you are supposed to kiss me."

Freddie jerked out of Carly's hold and stepped back in shock. "What?! Carly! I'm with Sam."

The large smile that erupted on her face was inexplicable, and there was no hint of her monotonous tone from earlier as she tossed her cell phone on the couch and spoke with a mixture of pleasure and relief. "Okay. Wanna go get a smoothie?"

"What?!" He swung his arms wildly and spluttered at her in disbelief. Clearly, the world had gone mad.

"A smoothie? You know, a mixture of frozen yogurt and fresh fruit blended to the perfect straw sucking consistency?"

"Not that! What just happened? What about the 'love emergency' and me being your microprocessor and all that chiz?!"

She let out a heavy sigh. "You aren't going to just let this go, are you?"

"Ummmm no." Freddie was understandably flustered as he moved around the brunette and collapsed on the couch. "I have no idea what just happened."

A muffled chime came out from under him and he felt Carly's phone vibrate beneath his thigh. Without much thought, he extracted the phone to hand to Carly and glanced at the screen.

As it was prone to do, Sam's name caught his eye, and he pulled the phone back from Carly's reaching hand to read the text message.

_Good job dude, good thing the boy didn't fail - can you get me a strawberry splat and fries from gs?_

His face quirked in confusion at first, but slowly melted into understanding as the events from the past 15 minutes flashed before his eyes with a new clarity. Sam had set him up! She _tested_ him, just like all of the poor suckers before him. He looked up to Carly in shock and jabbed his finger at her in accusation. "You!"

She snatched the phone from him quickly and shuffled a few steps back. "Me?" Her voice was all squeaky innocence, but he wasn't buying it.

He quickly scanned the apartment, seeking out the telltale wire or other sign of the hidden camera he knew was currently projecting his angry face to the third floor studio. "Where is it Carly?!" He felt his cheeks flush in his anger.

"Uh." Carly bounced from one foot to another nervously, mimicking a small child waiting for the restroom, and studiously avoided Freddie's gaze. Just as she opened up her mouth to shape some form of a response, her phone buzzed again in her hand. She stopped bouncing and glanced down at it. "I don't know what you are talking about. Stop being such a….nub?" She hesitated on the last word, the unfamiliar insult sounding foreign within the tones of her voice. She glanced back up at Freddie and offered a half smile and half shrug. "How 'bout that smoothie?"

"ERGH!" Freddie spun on his heel and marched up the two flights of stairs that led to the studio. When he reached the studio door, he shoved it open with enough force that it banged against the far wall and then bounced back to hit him square in the shoulder. "Ow!"

"You're so smooth." The snarky tone was unmistakable. Sam sat comfortably in one of the brightly patterned beanbags, her knees bent up and her cell phone lightly gripped in her hands against them.

"Ha! I knew you weren't hunting for inappropriately holiday themed eggs at a gym!"

"Inclement weather." She pointed towards the small studio window where a beam of bright sunshine shone through the glass.

"That doesn't even make sense."

She shrugged. "I don't make the rules Fredderly, I simply follow them."

He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms tightly over his chest. "Sam! I can't believe you tested me!"

She finally looked up from her cell phone and examined him lazily. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

Freddie groaned and consulted the ceiling in his frustration. "You have GOT to be kidding me."

She shrugged and turned her attention back to the open phone cradled in her lap. "Nope. I have no clue what has you all in a tizzy."

After a long pause, filled with Freddie's glaring eyes and occasional grunts of indignation, she tossed her cell phone lazily to the side and rolled her head around to face him again. She cocked her head slightly and lifted her brow, as if to say 'your move'.

Freddie took a few shuffled steps towards his tech cart, not once breaking the gaze of his opponent. "Oh yeah, well what about this!" With an inappropriate amount of relish, he clicked a button on his laptop and the iCarly monitor swung out and turned on. Much to Freddie's dismay, the projected scene was not of the familiar patterned couch of the Shay living room, but rather of a lame dating reality show that played regularly on cable daytime tv.

Sam rolled her eyes and waved her hands mockingly. "Oh, you caught me. I love to see people's hopes and dreams get crushed on live TV."

He pursed his lips and continued to press buttons on the laptop, hoping to discover the live feed he knew that Sam had to have been watching of his and Carly's earlier exchange. After flipping aimlessly through various saved videos and broadcast shows, Freddie slammed the laptop shut and growled in frustration. He crossed his arms over his chest, and tapped his foot impatiently as he watched Sam pick at the ends of her hair carelessly. There was no way that she pulled off this whole thing without some remaining evidence of her actions. Suddenly his eyes lit up as a realization crept its way into his consciousness.

He moved tentatively at first, but when she lifted her head to look at him curiously, he abandoned any attempts at stealth and with three bounds and a small leap, he belly flopped into the beanbag next to Sam, her cell phone gripped tightly in his hand. "Aha!"

He turned towards her, a victorious smirk covering the bottom half of his face, and waved the phone in jubilation. He expected her to look worried, or perhaps angry, but she just lazily lifted an eyebrow, her features full of condescending judgment.

He narrowed one eye at her lack of response, but refused to be deterred. With the cell phone gripped tightly in his outstretched hand, as far away from Sam as possible, he quickly scrolled through her recent text messages. There was the damning one he had seen earlier, congratulating Carly and putting in a smoothie order, but prior to that there were only several texts to and from Freddie, and he cringed slightly as he realized how sappy his messages were. He was never texting Sam a winking emoticon again, especially considering she generally just responded with clipped replies.

_You're such a dork. _

_Captain Kirk wannabe._

_Seriously dude? _

He continued to scroll through the messages, diving deeper and deeper into her text history, hoping to find something that proved Sam had been texting Carly instructions on what to say during her 'love confession'.

"Whatever! I know you tested me." He threw the useless phone into the beanbag next to him, and steadied his gaze on the infuriating blonde. He would defeat her in a battle of wills.

She lifted her hands up and offered him a half smirk. "Where's your proof. No evidence, no crime."

They engaged in a brief staring contest, Freddie's eyes full of anger and frustration, Sam's steely blue gaze fully amused. After several minutes passed, Freddie leaned forward, pausing when his face was only a foot from hers. "Just admit it."

Sam cocked an eyebrow at his game, but didn't flinch back. Instead, she cleared a few more inches between them. "Admit what?"

He could smell her beeswax chapstick, and he had to willfully stop himself from clearing away the last few inches that separated them. This was a battle of wills, and for once, Freddie Benson was going to win.

He waited for her to flinch, but her steady blue eyes remained amused and unwavering. A stray curl hung across her face that he desperately wanted to tuck behind her ear, and her lips smirked up in the slightest of smiles as she watched his eyes dart around the features of her face. The proximity began to weigh on him, and after a few moments, he leaned back with a huff, Sam's smirk growing in her victory.

He turned to the monitor for a moment to escape her infuriating gaze. There had to be a way to get Sam to admit that she had forced Carly into the embarrassing display that had taken place downstairs. The alternative was…impossible. After a brief moment of consideration, he set upon a course of action. He smirked lightly and rolled his tongue on the inside of his mouth before dramatically flipping his head to face the blonde headed she-demon he sort-of loved. "Soooo, I guess you should know that Carly is in love with me."

She didn't flinch. "Huh. Interesting stuff."

"Yup." He cocked his head in faux confidence and furiously wiped his hands against the thighs of his jeans to hide the sweaty palms that revealed his true nerves. "After all these years, she finally came around. Of course, there is a minor wrench in the works." He shot her a look from the corner of his eye.

Sam nodded affably. "I take it that I'm the wrench."

"Well, yeah."

"Bummer."

"But don't worry. I told her as painful as it may be, I was going to see this thing with you through to the end."

She rolled her eyes and shot him a flat look. "My hero."

Freddie nodded, trying to hold onto his nerves. "Yeah. But as soon as you and I are kaput, Carly and I will finally be together. I think we will have daisies at the wedding." He flinched slightly as the words left his mouth. Daisies? Daisies were not manly.

Sam cocked her head, ominous challenge mixing in with her usual nonchalance. "Why wait?"

Freddie turned to her suddenly, a sinking feeling in his stomach attempting to warn his head of the change in the game. "What?"

She nodded and shrugged, and continued to look him straight in the eye. "I mean, it's not like we can't date other people."

His brow furrowed. "Sam! We are not dating other people!" He let out a tiny huff of indignation. Of all the things to say…"Are you dating other people?" he looked at her in alarm.

She shrugged lazily and waved off his question with a casual flick of her hand. "Meh, I haven't had the time to juggle boys." He visibly relaxed and she cocked her eyebrow in response. "But there is this new guy that has been hanging out at the Groovy Smoothie…"

"Sam!"

"What? This way, everyone is happy, right? I mean, I wouldn't want to keep you away from your daisies Benson. I wonder if Groovy Smoothie boy would be my date to the wedding?"

"Sam! Stop it. We are not dating other people. We're…" he paused a moment and considered the proper term "going steady."

Her casual indifference cracked as she let out a disbelieving guffaw. "Going steady? Seriously? Who are you - Greg Brady?"

He glared in response to her mocking, but the bane of his existence continued to laugh obliviously. "Are you going to give me your school pin?"

"I don't have a school pin." He spoke deadpan, staring her down, daring her to laugh again. Something in his tone must have clicked, because even though a smirk continued to play at her lips, she remained silent in response. "But you should know," he dropped her gaze for a moment, studying the various knick-knacks of the studio, gathering confidence from the familiar backdrop of their lives "I'd pin you if I could." He looked up to meet her steady stare, and just as she quirked her lips and opened her mouth to release some quip, most likely about his poor choice of words, he interrupted. "Iloveyou." The words were rushed and Freddie was left breathless in his relief to have finally put them out there in the open….though the situation was less than ideal. He expelled a short breath and grinned up at Sam, whose mouth hung open in shock. Within seconds she snapped it shut and examined him with a narrowed and calculating gaze.

After a long, heavy pause, filled with the lack of the obvious response, Sam rolled her eyes and neck simultaneously and threw her hands up in defeat. "Fine! I tested you." She jabbed a finger towards Freddie. "You play dirty boy. I like it."

Various emotions battled it out on Freddie's face. Initial confusion morphed into victory at coercing Sam to confess, and finally the slightest bit of disappointment flushed his cheeks as he realized she hadn't even considered the possibility that his admission was sincere. "Yeah, well" he toyed with the shoelaces of his high-tops and avoided her gaze "dating you is like a crash-course in manipulation." He attempted to keep his voice light, steady, appropriate, but the slight change in her expression made him doubt his success. She bit her lip as she studied him, casually seeking out some understanding in the features of his face.

After a long, awkward moment, Freddie finally cleared his throat and clapped his hands down on his denim clad knees. "I'm kind of hungry. Let's go meet Carly at Groovy Smoothie." Without waiting for a response, he clambered up from the beanbag and headed out the studio door. He could hear her a few steps behind him as he made his way down the back stairwell. She was humming to herself, and most likely daydreaming about french fries dipped in Strawberry Splat. He bit back his frustration and anger and bounded down the steps a bit faster. He really could only blame himself. He knew better than to get his hopes up with Sam. She would forever be emotionally stunted and immature, and he was fairly certain that 'love' was not even in her vocabulary, especially when it applied to him. The whole thing was just a horrible prank gone terribly wrong. Terribly, terribly wron-

"Omph. Sam!" Freddie tried desperately to maintain his balance as Sam gripped the back of his sweatshirt and jerked him roughly back towards her. His heel caught on the edge of a step, and within seconds he was flat on his ass in the stairwell, Sam looking down on him in amusement. He rubbed his back mindlessly where it had caught the sharp edge of a step and glared up at her, refusing to justify her actions with even the slightest of smirks. With rolled eyes and a heavy sigh, she offered him a hand up. He eyed it wearily at first, but ultimately accepted it as she pulled him roughly to his feet. "What was that for?"

She ignored the question and instead studied his face, unreadable emotions flickering on and off her own carefully posed countenance. "You know why I tested you, right?"

"Um – because you're crazy?"

She rolled her eyes but didn't refute his claim, or offer any explanation of her own. Freddie bit his lip slightly, realizing a bit too late that Sam was attempting to be serious. One wrong move on his part, one opening for a joke or a jab, and she would disappear, morphing back to her usual infuriating self.

The quiet between them became intense, and Freddie desperately wanted to interrupt it, knowing that the awkwardness of the silence would ultimately scare her away, but afraid that anything he would say would accomplish the same thing only that much quicker.

"Um, Sam, upstairs, when I said I--"

She quickly waved off the remainder of his statement and glanced lazily around the stairwell. "It's always stairwells for us, isn't it?"

"and the soccer-mom-mobile."

Her laugh was quick and sincere, and she nodded her head in agreement. "Yeah. We've had some interesting times in that lame car of your's Benson."

She scuffed the toe of her converse against the corner of the step, her hands tucked safely in the back pockets of her plaid shorts. The only thing that gave away her nerves was the slight hunch of her shoulders and her refusal to meet Freddie's gaze. He watched silently as she jutted out her lips and bobbed her head in an amusing display of indecision, before finally rolling her neck to meet his steady gaze straight on.

"Freddie – I" She cleared her throat and dropped eye contact for the briefest of moments before looking back at him with determination. In one swift movement, she joined him on his step, their bodies flush. The proximity was overwhelming and Freddie finally moved the long piece of messy blonde hair that hung across her face to behind her ear.

"Freddie -" She paused, worrying her lip and scanning his face with an intensity that was foreign within her features. Right as the silence became heavy and thick, she pressed her lips together in her trademark grin. She extracted her right hand from her back pocket and roughly mussed his slightly too long brown hair before she leaned in and kissed him. It was sudden, brief, and intense, like most everything with Sam and before he could properly respond, she pulled away."I like your hair."

His head jerked back slightly at her words. "You like my hair? No you don't! You hate my hair. I know this because every day when you see me you tell me how much you hate my hair!"

Sam's hand tucked tightly back in her back pocket, she lifted her shoulders in a nonchalant shrug, as she spun on her heel and began to make her way down the last remaining steps that led to the Shay living room. "Well, you know what I mean."

*

**A/N - Well there you have it! I hope it was semi-worth the way too long wait. I honestly never thought I would post this, because I just wasn't invested in getting it right and I didn't want to risk ending the fic on a sour note. But a few weeks ago I was reading some recent reviews, and I decided I owed y'all an epilogue, so I got to editing and now I feel pretty okay with it. So if you liked it, let me know!**

**Also, I am working on quite a few other multi-chapter fics but I have hit road blocks in each, so I am hoping that posting this will help me trudge through and find my way back to inspiration. If anyone out there is willing to bounce ideas with me, or beta some of the stuff I already have, let me know.**

**Thanks again for reading.**


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